We drove by the Mansion to drop some things off for the residents and Madeline, who is 93, was sitting out on the porch, it was a beautiful afternoon. Madeline has been at the Mansion a few months, and has brightened the place considerably, she is active, engaged and fun to be around. I could sense she was in a reflective mood, she enjoyed some quiet time alone with Red, who seems to sense what people want and need. He sat quietly with her for 10 minutes or so.
I am happy to report that the Mansion has raised over $4,000 on the first full day of its gofundme project to help purchase a van to take the Mansion residents to doctors and on field trips, visits to their families and other necessary outings. Without a van, the residents cannot easily go anywhere, and the one the Mansion has is dying.
This is a very encouraging first day for a gofundme project. The Mansion owner, George Scala, is prepared to pay half the cost – $10,000 – and is seeking to raise the other half online. So they need $6,000 more dollars to be able to purchase the van. I am hopeful and excited for them.
“Happy To Help,” wrote Kathie Lehtonen, who donated $25, “enjoy some lovely rides this Spring and stop and get ice cream! That’s what my Mom loved.” The Mansion does, in fact, set out in their van for ice cream on some hot summer days
The Army Of Good is turning out to be mighty, they don’t argue or scream, they just do good. Thank you. You can follow the details here. You can donate here. The big untold story in America is that people are good, given the chance.
Connie’s room is the talk of the Mansion, is is crammed with boxes of yarn.
We brought her a dog brush to keep in her room, and she loves brushing Red. It is a nurturing and comforting thing.
Connie told me some of her back story today, she lived in upstate New York and she had a close friend, and their husbands went hunting together – he worked in construction.
While the men were gone, she and her friend knitted and crocheted, and they began selling sweaters and blankets and mittens and scarves. “We made a kind of business out of it,” she said.
She is deeply into this work again, I see it has given structure and focus to her life. It is very difficult for Connie to move around much, she needs an oxygen machine nearby to breathe.
She is insistent she does not want to sell the things she makes, she wants to give them as presents.
We offered to take some of the yarn out of the room if it’s too much, but she says no, she wants to keep it, she may start making blankets and sweaters. She means to give them away to people, and although she said she didn’t know where she would put any more, I see she is not giving any up.
Connie is already making baby caps for newborns at Albany Medical Center, three of the boxes she received this week are baby wool, three more, behind Red, are regular wool.
She is dumbstruck by your generosity, I think Connie was not ever given much in her life.
She surprised me by handing me a hand-written note on her “memo” pad and asked me to share it on the blog.
“I would like to thank everyone for your patterns and needles that you have sent. If possible, I would like a pattern for crochet baby hat and blanket as I like to crochet too and it would be nice to switch back and forth. Again, thank you very much.”
Connie asked me if it was all right to make that request, she wasn’t sure about it, and I said of course, people will help if they can and wish to, and not if they can’t. It is good for you to ask, I said, you have never asked for a thing, and I have asked you a hundred times if there is anything you want.
I just guessed right about what you wanted and needed. Now, it’s good to know what you want. There is an Army Of Good out there, I told her, and they care about you and the other people here. Red loved his brushing, by the way.
While at the Mansion today, I learned that they are in desperate need of a van to transport residents to doctors and take them out on field trips and shopping excursions. There are no funds to buy the van, so I suggested that they consider a gofundme project and I would support it on the blog.
I think they liked the idea. They are looking to see if a used one is available.
More later.
If you wish to write Connie or the other residents of the Mansion, you can do so at this address: The Mansion, 11 S. Union Avenue, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816. Several new residents are coming next week, but I was given a list of first names today of residents who wish to receive messages: Bruce, Allan, Sylvie, Jean G., John Z., Carl (Bob), John R., Alanna, Peggie, Ellen, Joan, Brenda, Christie, Connie, Alice, Madeline, Mary, Barbara, Bill H., Brother Peter, Diane, Helen, Jean A., Gerry.
Maria and Connie have become friends, and Connie said she hoped Maria could come by before she left for India, she wanted to wish her a safe journey and good trip. Connie asked if she could give Maria and a hug, and this scene did touch my heart in a particular way, I don’t know how else to say it.
Connie has greatly opened up to Maria and as a result of your gifts and messages. She is smiling all the time, her door is always open, the lights are always on, she is always busy and connected. So much of what has been taken from her has been given back.
No one can reverse the aging experience, or give back all of the things left behind, but attention and love and thought makes a staggering difference. You are helping to give these good people a way to live their lives with meaning and hope. Thanks.
Connie is looking for baby wool so she can make baby hats for newborns at the Albany Medical Center. This is a wonderful and ambitious project for her, if you have any baby wool you can sent it to her c/o The Mansion, 11 S. Union St., Cambridge, N.Y.., 12816.
If you wish to send letters to the Mansion residents, here are their first names: Ellen, Mary, Gerry, Sylvie, Diane, Alice, Jean G., Madeline, Joan, Allan, Carl (Bob), John K., Aileen, Christie, Helen, Connie, Alanna, Barbara, Peggie, Dennis, John R., Bruce, John Z., Bill.
I loved seeing this hug, and was grateful to be able to hug both of these beautiful women myself.
Yesterday, we went to the Mansion to drop off some Valentine’s Day gifts – they are now pouring in – and Katie Perez, the Mansion director, called us over to say hello to Ellen, who is new to the Mansion. I sat by while Ellen cuddle with Red – she misses her dogs and cats, like almost everyone at the Mansion. Katie was reassuring Ellen about life at the Mansion, she said she saw she had already made one friend – Diane, and that she, Katie, was another friend.
“I know,” said Ellen, “I love you.” Of all the emotional moments I see at the Mansion, the most powerful are those of the first days or weeks, when the residents first arrive. They have left everything they know and love behind, almost certainly for good, they are crossing from one phase of life to another, and they know it.
It can be a lonely time, especially before they have a chance to settle and meet people.
However loving the care, there is a sense of loss and sadness about that, and Katie was so skillful and loving about dealing with it, the two held hands for a long time. There is much love around the Mansion, it is a Medicaid Assisted Care Facility, and people’s lives are not always simple.
Red makes a difference, he just lights up the spaces he occupies, and is patient and living and valuable.
Your Valentine’s Day messages are the talk of the Mansion, everyone is so excited, and how great to let them know that they are loved and thought of you. Thank you.
Current list of Mansion residents. Ellen, is new, and there are Jean, Mary, Gerry, Sylvie, Diane, Alice, Jean, Madeline, Joan, Allan, Carl (Bob) John K., Aileen, Christie, Helen, Connie, Alanna, Barbara, Peggie, Dennis, John R., Bruce, John Z., and a new Bill.
Thank you all for doing this, it really matters. You bring the light.
Maria and I came to the Mansion to visit residents with Red, but when we came into the activity room, Maria was invited to sit down and talk. The women at the Mansion are fascinated by her colorful leggings, they want to know where she buys her clothes. She is a fashion hit there.
She was also asked a lot about her upcoming trip to India, and we had a great discussion about hygiene, toilets, food and sex trafficking. At least three of the women in the room – Madeline, who is 93, Jean and Barbara, said they would love to go to India with her.
Everyone talked about the trips they had taken, and the experiences they had in their other lives. We had a good time, it was a fun and lively discussion. Barbara, who was sitting next to Maria, talked about a trip to Alaska, and the blue ice she loved there. She said she’d go again in a minute. “I’ll go to India too, if I can,” she said.
Maybe next trip. As the residents get to know us, the stories and the memories flow more easily. I have received several invitations to come to the Mansion for dinner while Maria is away. I accepted for one evening, Red is invited also. The activity room is a nerve center for the Mansion, we talked for a half hour, but had to make other visits to people. Maria comes along sometimes, she is a big hit there.
I think the women there are especially interested in hearing her story, she is comfortable telling. I am often struck by the openness of women to friendship, to talking to one another. It is not something most men experience.
