The ninth degree of humility in the Rules of St. Benedict invites us to speak gently to one another. In my lifetime, we have never been less conscious of this critical dimension of life than we are now.
We have become so angry and cruel to one another that it often feels that we are losing the very fabric of trust and courtesy, and as a result, weakening the fabric of society, our willingness to talk to and listen to one another, and abandoning our historic care for the community. We are also losing the ability of our government to address and deal with governing sanely. We are electing the worst of us, not the best, and threatening the lives of our families and children.
It has become almost unbearable to watch the news, read about it online, or listen to congressional hearings, which, believe it or not, were once bipartisan and essential ways of learning about issues rather than exploiting them to hurt and punish people we disagree with.
But I won’t spend the rest of my life quivering, resenting, and worrying. It’s my job to be in a better place. The question is how.
For most of my life, American civility and its long history of peaceful power transmission have been known and admired worldwide. The long and deeply held embrace of decorum, decency, seriousness, respect, and joint deliberation now seems a thing of the past. It’s hard to find nations that admire us now or even citizens that do.
Instead of campaigning to report the damage of divisiveness, we seem to be campaigning to extend and expand it.
Honesty has become a hellish and inverse act, more suiting magicians than legislators. Lies make money and win voters. Truth is increasingly born of lies, “tweets,” AI creations, and conspiracies. One day, something is hailed as the truth; the next day, it is condemned as a lie. How difficult it is for any rational person to keep up. After a while, many of us don’t want to try.
Our so-called news – more and more visual and digital – are repositories of cruelty, violence, lies, insults, and denial.
The people we elected to lead and guide us – our anointed guardians of the law and the judges of national values and character- have turned into middle school playground bullies, full of cruelty and complaints. Perhaps the most painful of all, it is hard to believe that one of our most influential leaders and influencers, a former president himself, is the cruelest of them all, the witch in the mirror, lying, cheating, and peering at his many critics with nicknames, insults, and lies.
It’s easy enough to say I’m moving away from politics; there is nothing there for me that I can find.
But the problem is that politics are essential, and the kind of politics we are confronting erodes the quality of our lives. That alone should be a good reason for hating and rejecting hateful politicians, but it isn’t working that way anymore. Lies and hatred are now the way to the top. As long as the stock market is fat and happy, most people will also be content to be satisfied. And there are many bloated and rich and happy people around these days.
While the stock market keeps increasing, our country’s precious values are falling. Returning them will take a long time and a lot of hard work. Our country is sick right now.
What does this mean for the rest of us? What does this mean for me? t means that no one is left up top to save us but ourselves.
I stand with the spiritualists who argue that if the country, our children, our work and partners and neighborhoods, our temples and churches, are to salvage anything of the national spirit and character of this country as the world has always known it, then the first step for me in this new challenge is to stay out of the fray.
Arguing with strangers is pointless now, a waste of time and energy. I need to be gentle and kind.
I can believe what I want and keep it within me; I don’t need to argue with anyone or persuade them of my beliefs.
I’m joining the decency movement. I believe that decency should return as a value we share, as well as kindness and compassion and experience standing as walls against moral corruption and the politics of cruelty.
St. Benedict’s call for humility in the sixth century has long been considered something that brought order and compassion to a world in turmoil for over a thousand years.
I wonder if humility can do it again just as it did then, with people like me starting at the bottom – maybe you and me – working up, now down.
I accept that those who depend on for leadership can’t lead right now. I think it has to come from inside of me, not outside from others.
I am working to learn to speak softly, not a natural state for me. And to be compassionate. That is not a natural state for the nation now.
Humility is out of fashion now.
I have been thinking about humility, and I believe it is the glue that binds the human race together.
When I know myself, I see my needs in the eyes of the rest of the world, and I plan to respond softly and accordingly.
