Bedlam Farm Blog Journal by Jon Katz

Tonight is Belly Dancing Class for Maria, a new tradition is for me to cook something special on Thursday, from a healthy Storm Pizza to rich, delicious and even healthier veggie casserole, which may become my new specialty as Spring approaches.

It’s one of the most flavorful and creative meals for me, and it gives me a wide range of options and choices. I can innovate, you can put almost anything in there.

I cook this casserole at 450 degrees for 40 minutes. I can try out all kinds of things in a casserole.

I will try to remember all of the things I put into it, I’ve been shopping for two or three days in different places for the ingredients.

In a month or so, when the Moses Farm Stand opens, I’ll be able to get most of what I need at one place, but summer is a great time for eating up here, there are good farm stands all over the place. The fresh farm food is a boon to living here.

But back to the casserole.

Let’s see, I cut vegetables and spread them out in layers. Between layers I spread nutritional yeast,  CBD hearts, veggie sprouts, parmesan cheese and Panko crumbs (on the top.)

The layers include beets,  sliced potatoes, regular and sweet, red and yellow peppers,  two kinds of squash, yellow and Butternut, kale, parsley, scallion, oregano, tarragon, tofu.

Maria loves a crusty top and so do I, so I top the casserole with some wheat Mennonite pasta, layers of tofu, broccoli, covered with parmesan cheese, sprinkled goat cheese with garlic, and finally,  Panko crumbs and Virgin Olive Oil.

I sprinkle some olive oil over every layer to keep the casserole moist. In the oven, it sinks a bit.

I’ll add four or five teaspoons of marinara sauce to the top row to add some flavor. I served this the other night to friends, it was a big hit. I shied away from veggie dishes for awhile, they seemed to bland to me, but then, up here, I started eating fresh vegetables (and Maria loves fresh vegetables,) and I discovered their many different flavors.

I love eating them now. Maria gets home around 7:30 on Belly Dancing nights, she is always happy and tired, I’m happy to give her a warm and healthy and filling meal.

I had an extraordinarily beautiful experience this morning, I hosted the first ever Mansion Meditation Group for residents who wished to learn how to meditate and incorporate this into their daily lives.

Of the dozen  residents I invited, five or six raised their hands immediately, which surprised me. We left the Activity Room and went to the Dining Room, which was quiet and private it. I can also use the Great Room.

We sat in a small circle around a dining room table, within easy earshot and reach of one another.

There is a trove of evidence showing that meditation can be very healthy for the elderly, it decreases blood pressure, helps the heart,  and supports mental health. The extreme elderly are under great pressure and stress, even if much of their traditional life has been taken from them.

Six residents signed up, including Sylvie and Madeline and Wayne (I didn’t ask the others for permission to use their names). I conducted a five minute guided meditation, using my Iphone as a timer.

I suggested to the residents that they first breathe in and out several times, then scan their body, then leave judgement and anxiety behind in so far as they could. I reminded them there is no failure in meditation, it is not a test, there is no messing up.

They can just follow their minds, and when they feel too distracted, just pay attention to their breathing again.

Our minds our minds, all we are trying to do, I said, is find a sweet and calm place inside of ourselves, lives are not simple. None of them had ever meditated in their lives, and only one, Sylvie, had even heard of it.

They took to it instantly, they closed and opened their eyes as suggested, breathed deeply, and then sat in quiet.  There was a marked calming about them, almost a white light I could see.

I could also see them settle into this peaceful and calming exercise. They were shocked by it, several said they had no idea what to expect, they all said they enjoyed it very much, they all asked me to come back regularly, they all wanted to sign up for my Meditation Group.

I feel I am approaching a level of trust with the residents, I don’t think they would have tried this if I was just a man walking through with a dog. We have been through a lot together. Red joined in, he is a viscerally spiritual creature, and lay down right next to us, and didn’t move.

This was meaningful for me beyond description, their lives are very difficult and full of stress and worry, even though they have voluntarily given up on so much responsibility. If there was ever a way to do good in a small and free way, this was it. Doing this felt as good as anything I can remember doing at the Mansion. I also love reading to them, I have some great stories for next week.

I meditated with them today, and thus felt a closeness that was  deeply spiritual. I appreciate taking what I have learned from my daily meditating and sharing it.

I am eager to return to the next Meditation Class, next Thursday and I also offered this to the staff and the aides. I doubt they will take the time to do it, but I hope they do. The people who need it the most seem the most reluctant to do it.

It has helped me more than I can say.

(caption: Gus on Fanny)

Maria and I have  decided to create a weekly podcast called “Awoke: Life At Bedlam Farm.” We hope to launch it early in April. The podcast will be free.

Maria and I will do it together, we will talk about our lives together, our “awakening” as creative people seeking a life of fulfillment, and our lives with one another, and with dogs, donkeys, sheep, chickens, and barn cats in rural America.

We share a life of creativity and purpose. I’ve asked Mannix Marketing, the designer of both of our blogs, to help setting up the podcast, which will be accessible through a button on our blogs.

They are looking into it.

Our tentative title is “Awoke: Life At Bedlam Farm.”

There will be no charge, but people who like the podcast and find it valuable, can make a donation or contribution to support the podcast if they wish.

Maria has been appearing each week on my weekly broadcast “Talking To Animals,” and we enjoy appearing together and talking about our lives with dogs and other animals.

We’ve also gotten a strong response to our talks together, they have inspired us to finally get moving on a podcast, something we’ve talked about for several years.

A podcast – an increasingly popular form of media – is a digital media file distributed over the Internet using syndication feeds for playback on portable media players, smartphones and personal computers.

There are millions of podcasts now, the medium has become enormous.

The podcast itself is a particular type of webcast which, like “radio,” can mean either the content itself or the method by which it’s distributed, the latter called podcasting.

People can subscribe to this kind of digital feed by submitting their address a distributor like Itunes or Podcatcher, which is software downloaded to your device. Unlike radio, podcasts are not in real time, you can listen whenever you please.

Some podcasts, on hosts like “TalkShoe,” can be live and interactive, and can receive phone calls, like a radio show. People could sign up and participate in the podcast with permission.

We’re looking into that format as well as the convention podcast, which is a file of Maria and I talking. We could read and discussions questions e-mailed to us.

I think this is an exciting and timely stop for us to take, our farm is a deeply spiritual and special place, from Maria’s walk in the woods to our love of donkeys and dogs, to the passion we both have for our creativity.

We have a lot to say to one another, and to you, about our lives. Many people have asked me about a podcast. It’s time.

My radio show, “Talking To Animals,” inspired us to move forward, the program is going well, which is something of a miracle, but in the event it fails, or the station is sold, we’ll have an interactive backstop in place. I don’t wish to lose what we have built up there.

Maria and I will be in touch with the details as they emerge.

I’ve been raising money for various things for several years now, ever since the 2016 Election, when the country seemed to be pulling apart. I’ve come to know many of the loyal people who have been supporting the refugees, the soccer team, the scholarship children, the wish lists, community radio, farmers in animal rights trouble, the New York Carriage Horses, and the Mansion residents, my longest last task of good.

Most are strangers who I will never know, an irony of our times. CDobbs is one of those strangers, yet I feel especially close to her and grateful for her.

Most people send contributions online, but there are many letter writers still, people who still want to take time and think about their messages to me, and every day I go to my Post Office Box and get these letters, this has become such a cherished ritual for me.

Among my favorites are the $5 people, the people from small towns and villages all over the country who take the time to place $5 and $10 bills, sometimes a few single dollar bills, write them out, put them in envelopes, put stamps on, get them in the mail.

Their contributions are small, and I couldn’t do this work without larger contributions, but the $5 people have a special place in my heart.

A Paypal or credit donation – just as precious to me –  takes two or three seconds, these crumpled handwritten letters take some time. All contributions are special to me, they make our work possible. But some of these get lodged in my heat and my imagination.

Every month for several years now, I get a letter from CDobbs, she lives near Indianapolis in Indiana. That is all I know about her, and for all I know, it might be a him. But I think it’s  woman.

Each letter contains a $5 bill, and a short letter filled with inspiration and appreciation and enthusiasm. She uses a lot of exclamation points.  This latest letter is typical

“Hello, Mr. Katz,” she wrote on February 27. “Thank you for your beautiful photographs and the Story Of Red! Please use this donation you would like, C Dobbs.

The letters are a bit formal, she calls me “Mr.,” which almost no one does and she never tells me her full name. Online communications are much less formal. I picture CDobbs as an older woman, perhaps retired. In college, one of the few courses I took was in handwriting analysis, it stuck with me.

I see CDobbs in my mind as coming down to her kitchen, sitting at her table with a cup of coffee, turning to my blog and perhaps Maria’s blog as she drinks her coffee and perhaps scans her morning paper for local news and obituaries. I see her as being retired, on a fixed income, perhaps a widow.

I imagine her in sensible shoes, sitting in the cold Indiana winter in a sweater, following my adventures and the lives of the animals on Bedlam Farm, clucking at my stumbles and missteps and outbursts. She is an enthusiastic and positive person, I think of her as being religious.

I think of her as being nice, and as being empathetic and thoughtful. She has never written a nasty letter to anyone in her life, online or off.

She is a dog lover, for sure, I don’t know if she still has a dog, I think she does. Maybe a cat now.

On her calendar on the refrigerator is a reminder to send me $5 every month. She wants and expects nothing back, she is just thanking me for my photos – such a sweet thing to do – and for my writing about the dogs and other animals here.

I think she has been following me for a very long time, and has chosen to stick it out with me, as some others regularly storm off in a bilious huff. I am very glad there are people like CDobbs in the world, they encourage me to be  better.

This morning, I called a florist in Indiana and ordered a floral arrangement and a box of chocolates for CDobbs, they will arrive either today or tomorrow. They asked for a telephone number, but I don’t have one.

It’s cold in Indiana right now, but I’m betting she will be home. I told the florist they can leave the flowers with a neighbor or on the porch. I sent a note, saying, “thanks CDobbs, I am grateful for your kind words and support, and for your monthly contribution of $5.

You are an inspiration to me, Best, Jon Katz.

When I looked at this image a few minutes ago (I just put it up for sale), I saw it, and then several readers messaged me about it. I see a figure in this image, a woman. The setting sun is her heart, her arms are outstretched, her fiery skirt is flowing, and she has a hat on top of her head.

Maria says this is a goddess for sure, she sees it also. I never saw it when I took the photo. I brought up the yellow in my Aperture photo program, that is when it hit me that there was a powerful spirit up there. Or I could be losing my mind after a long and hard winter that doesn’t seem to want to let  go.