Bedlam Farm Blog Journal by Jon Katz

12 June

Beautiful Afternoon, Scenes From The Farm: Wednesday, June 1, 2024. Images From Bedlam Farm

by Jon Katz

This is a new series of photography aimed at capturing the feeling and beauty of Bedlam Farm. Today, I went out with my Iphone to work on a piece on the myth of security. I was upset by a sad report about a family member; it was depressing.

We have a new ritual, Zip and I. He jumps into my lap. I hold and scratch him for 15-20 minutes, then I get to work, reading or writing for the blog. When I go to work, Zip gets it, hops off, and sleeps on the chair next to me, the one Maria often uses (she is belly dancing tonight.)

(In the above photo, the donkeys and sheep grazing just a few feet away from where I sit with Zip for a while every afternoon.)

I have to say that holding Zap and communicating with him makes me feel a lot better. He seems to have given up on the baby chipmunks for now; perhaps he gets them all at night when he is prowling around and hunting. I look forward to my afternoon session with Zip; he does, too. Perhaps sensing my sadness, which he does, he was soft, gentle, and affectionate.

I walk around the farm two or three times a day after going to the pharmacy, the food co-op,   Bernard Farm for fresh bread and vegetables, or the post office or bank. Tomorrow I go to Saratoga to see if my mouth is accepting the screw implanted for my implant crown. If so, I’ll get the crown in a week or so.

I realize I need to pay more attention to the beauty that brought and sustains us here. So, this is a way to focus on that more. No life is perfect or without suffering, but the beauty I see every morning sustains and comforts me.

It’s our 14th wedding anniversary, but it’s something to be grateful for, not necessarily something to celebrate by going out to dinner. We are going about our business as usual, but I never stop being thankful for Maria.

 

Zip is keeping me company while I work a foot away.

They were grazing in the afternoon. Always beautiful to me.

The garden bed is coming to life.

 

12 June

Sarah’s Healthy Pantry Food Choices For Tuesday: French Onion Soup, $20. 64 For 12, Prego Tomato Sauce, $5.23 For One.

by Jon Katz

God provides and the Army Of Good helps. The Cambridge Food Pantry is out of two important things today, Tuesday, and Sarah is asking for help. Her choices just below. Pantry Director Sarah does not ask anyone to do something she doesn’t do, she works so hard day after day. I hope we can ease her life today for just a few dollars.

One of the things she works so hard on is getting people who are hungry the food that they love and miss. Today, a somewhat fancy and rare dish for the pantry: French Onion soup, something different, something new.

 

First Choice Today: Campbell’s Condensed French Onion Soup, 10.5 Ounce Can (Pack of 12).

Also: Prego Italian Tomato Pasta Sauce, Flavored With Meat, 45 Oz Jar, $5.23.

You can see and purchase other items on the Wish List today, just go here. Many of you have been donating more than one thing at a time. Thank you. You are transforming lives.

Scores of boxes arrived from the Albany Food Bank yesterday. Sarah and Maria opened them, sorted them (Sarah never quite knew what was coming), and puts them on the shelves. Almost all of them will be gone by 3 p.m. today.

12 June

Happy Anniversary To Us: 14 Remarkable Years. Two Lives Were Saved.

by Jon Katz

Maria woke up this morning and reminded me that today is our 14th Wedding Anniversary. I sometimes forget that we married in a big barn with donkeys and sheep outside the door. It was the perfect place for us to get married and set a tone that continues in our marriage today.

There is not much I haven’t said about our marriage. The bottom line is that Maria and I each helped to save the other’s life and teach the other what it means to feel joy, love, and happiness.

Maria said that the length of our marriage doesn’t matter; it feels like we’ve been together all our lives. That is what it feels like. I seem to love Maria more daily; if that is even possible, and for reasons I may never comprehend, she loves me in return.

She told me the other day that she loves me more than ever as I learn to face my problems and flaws, support her dreams, and appreciate her gifts and worth to be better and healthier.

Maria is not like the other children. She is different, a fiercely individual and passionate human being. She is caring, forgiving, generous, and, above all, creative.

We love being together.

We laugh all the time, fight sometimes, and are more respectful of our different lives than ever.

We both understand that I will likely be the first to go, and our conversations about death have been honest and helpful.  We both accept life.

I lost a close friend and neighbor this week, a vital, strong-willed, and passionate man who collapsed and suffered a massive heart attack. He was a good friend and was younger than me. His death reminded me to live honestly and well and think of people other than myself.

I accept death as a part of life, but he is the closest person who physically has died so abruptly. I need to absorb it. His death made me appreciate my life with Maria and cherish what is left. He had a good life; he lived the way he wanted and died the way he wanted. I’m grateful for knowing him.

Maria has grown and changed dramatically over these years, but her core has remained the same. I could not have been more fortunate. She is the greatest gift from leaving my ordinary life behind and moving to the country.

I still can’t believe we can live together in a remote town in upstate New York with more cows than people. It was the last place I ever expected to meet anyone I would come to love. There are miracles.

And here we are, 14 years later, together on the small farm with our dogs, barn cats, sheep, and donkeys. Our paradise, woods, and beauty.

When I am low, she lifts me; when I am small, she makes me large. When I am wrong, she makes me right. Together, we share the meaning of life, good and bad.

We have no plans to celebrate our anniversary, at least today. We’re both too busy. This weekend, we might go to a movie and have dinner or stay at home and celebrate what we have.

Life is always too short in some ways, but whenever I feel low or vulnerable, I think of Maria as my love and partner in life, and it just lifts my heart and makes my soul sing. A life with Maria is joyful and meaningful, no matter what else happens.

We are both an excellent team, different but entirely in sync. The German and Sicilian in her blood makes her all the more interesting. When she’s angry, I tell her she’s like a raccoon caught in a trap, hissing and steaming.

Every time I look at her, my heart lifts. We even enjoy fighting occasionally; it’s great fun to make up. When I wake up and look at her each morning, I thank the spirits for being married to the person lying in bed beside me. She is, along with my daughter, the greatest gift of my life.

Happy Anniversary, Maria! You are the heart of my life.

11 June

Flower Art: Into The Whirlwind. Celebrating Color Madness. Flowers Are Mother Nature’s Kisses. Hang On

by Jon Katz

I had a lot of fun with my flowers today. I took some out into the sun and went to town. I hope you enjoy it too. I’m signing off; I’ll see you in the morning then. The flowers are all bunched together; there are too many names for me to mention. Bless the sun.

The sun is my flower friend.

A dance of some kind.

Looking me right in the die and daring me…

I did toss in a Garbera daisy or two.

She was singing to the sun.

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