I am learning what it’s like to be one of those Dutch children who sticks their finger in the dike. In this case, the breaking dike is truth, decency, and respect, things I was taught were necessary, even if I sometimes forgot them.

I have a front-row seat on this ugly social and technological revolution.

And yes, I will fight it to the end and challenge it when it comes to me. I want a part of my legacy to be that I fought for truth, which is now a losing battle in America.

At least I didn’t lose quietly. I’ll go down with the ship. And I’m sorry, I’ll never love a whiner or complainer.

Earlier this week, Maria and I recorded the first video in a new series, “This Is Us,” about our life together. Many people wrote to say they appreciated the video and thanked us for sharing our lives. We enjoyed it.

Then, others (see below) wrote to call me a thief or Frankenstein or to say they heard loud lip-smacking sounds from me in the video, which ruined their experience. Why didn’t you stop the Dry Mouth?  Your Lip-Smack ruined it for me. Could you just make it go away?

Maria and I reviewed these messages on our phones or computers. Here are some of the early ones. These and some. of the others made me sick and angry.

For those who might like to understand the issue rather than demand it go away instantly, Dry mouth, also known as xerostomia, is a condition in which my salivary glands don’t produce enough saliva.

This results in a dry, often uncomfortable feeling in my mouth, making it sometimes difficult to chew, swallow, or speak properly. It can usually be caused by certain medications, dehydration, or underlying medical conditions.

It’s not a deliberate choice. I have no wand or switch to pull.

At the outset, I will acknowledge but never apologize for having a “Dry Mouth,” probably caused by one of those super medicines I am taking for diabetes. We don’t hear the sounds on our tech equipment, but others listen to them on theirs; most don’t.

Here’s how some responded. My case is mild and is somehow amplified by computers that aren’t connecting to mine. It is not curable but can sometimes be controlled, like diabetes itself.

Here are some of the first messages:

“Just a tip-Maria sounds great, but you constantly smack your lips, and it’s extremely distracting. If possible, you should be aware of that and try to get it under control because it seriously detracts from what could otherwise be an enjoyable experience.”  – Pauline.

Pauline, my response is this: get lost. Can you imagine having a Dry Mouth and not knowing it? I’m not eager to be an “enjoyable experience” for you. Try TikTok.

Then from Sylvia: “You’re stealing a trademarked title from an extremely popular TV show, which seems unimaginative. Maybe find another, more original one?”

Instead of writing obnoxious and offensive messages, Sylvia might go to Google and ask for “Dry Mouth.” This took me about four seconds to find. I’ve never heard of your TV show, Sylvia; titles cannot be copyrighted. Why not find out the truth rather than blow smoke out of your ass?

Then:

“There’s a weird audio sound in the background – it sounds like someone is constantly making a kissing noise with their lips. Can you just adjust it so we don’t hear that? It could be a setting on your camera. It makes it hard to understand you.” – Donald.

I’m the weird audio sound, Donald; it’s called getting older. And no, I can’t erase my condition because it suits you.  My camera has nothing to do with it. It’s a lot more complex than that. And most people had no trouble.

Then, there was  David,  the inevitable defender of the Social Media Secret Police And Whining Association: “It doesn’t bother me much, but to be fair to your commenter, the sound is neither soft nor occasional – it’s constant and pretty loud. Maybe it sounds different on different speakers.”

If it doesn’t bother you, David, and you’re not breaking my heart, Please mind your business. I don’t need to be fair to Donald; you can do it. I’m busy working.  And yes, it differs on different speakers, making it almost impossible to eliminate.

I shouldn’t leave out the bulk of the messengers I received: the courteous and appreciative non-whiners like Susan. “I have always loved Maria’s Monday Morning Videos. What a treat to finish the week with you both!Many thanks !👍“

About 80 percent of the messages said they loved it and enjoyed seeing us talk together. At least, at first, I did, too. Then I remembered that this is America in 2025 – nothing is good.

You are most welcome, Susan. I give thanks for people like you.

And Chris: “What pitiful lives if that’s what a few people got out of your very enjoyable video. I’m a nurse practitioner, and I didn’t notice it. I hope your delete button gets a lot of use. Please remember all the joy you bring to so many by sharing your lives. ”

I appreciate Chris’s message.

I will never look or sound as good as Maria. That hasn’t stopped me, and it won’t. Nor would she want it to. But our partnership comes through in our videos, and we are proud of them.

When push comes to shove, it’s often about what we hear, not what is said. I’m beginning to sniff something I’ve never experienced: contempt for the old and seeing them as disgusting and gross, something to be fixed out of sight and dismissed.

My simple blog triggers one bizarre struggle after another. Our beautiful country is crawling with broken people.  For example, I was once assaulted for daring to give an apple to a farmer’s horse. (I give him one every week, and the farmer loves it.)

Then there was the battle over euthanizing a dying horse, and then Zip; I was accused of being a murderous abuser for not bringing him into the house every night to sleep but getting him a heated Cat House out in the barn instead.

My misspelling of a flower caused weeks of outrage, not to mention the Spelling Correction By Spelling Addicts who don’t like my Dyslexia. A Massachusetts art class and professor led an assault on the way I used “still life.” That went on for days.

I hope the people with medical disorders who blog don’t quit. I won’t.

Now I’m in trouble for Dry Mouth. A big problem in America is that too many people have nothing to do but send nasty messages to strangers. As is evident, I have little respect for these people.

Screenshot

Social media is transforming our culture, sometimes for the better and often for the worse.

It’s never been easier for fools to jump to conclusions or imagine their truth. Respect for honesty is evaporating. Social media is a gift to the lazy, the whiners, and the complainers. They take up so much space.

To my surprise, ageism lives on and thrives on social media, as elsewhere. You can’t appreciate this until you are older.

People who are ill or aging are constantly defiled and defined as being disgusting or repulsive or ridiculed on TV or in Hollywood, as if aging could be eliminated technically at any time. Boy, are these people in for a surprise.

All my life, I’ve heard talk of the pain of bigotry. I never imagined I would be a victim or target of it. Going after the elderly is simple; they rarely have a chance to respond. I have a chance, and I will use it. I’m no victim, but I’m looking at it differently now.

I never whine, complain, or make demands of others about their work, especially if it’s free. And I never ridicule or complain about physical problems, not for Dyslexia, not for Dry Mouth.

To people online with illness and disability, hang on. There are lots of good people out there and lots of support. You will get cruel and obnoxious messages as I have. One cliche I’ve learned is true is this: what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

_____

Here is some truth and a dose of reality for those who care – and there are many of you blessedly.

I am 77 years old. Maria and I have been posting videos for years, and we do not hear this loud and continuous lip-smacking. Neither do many of our readers and followers. I occasionally hear some of it, but it is neither noisy nor continuous.

We will investigate these complaints, but don’t kid yourself—different computer browsers and phones have different audio systems. Nobody can fix all of them at once, surely not me.

My usual Lip-Smacking is not loud; I can’t control any devices but mine. In the meantime, your choices are to put up with it or skip it. Nobody is putting a gun to anybody’s head. I hate whiners and complainers; I’m allergic to them, and my tongue hasn’t killed anyone yet.

If people can’t bear my voice, which is more often praised, then that’s your problem, not mine. Nothing worth having in life is ever completely free.  I hope to be worthy.

I’m not going to hide who or what I am. Next Friday morning, Lip-Smacking and all, Maria and I will post our videos; the third version of “This Is Us,” I’ll be sucking on one of those Biotene Mouth Lozenges. I’ll be as soft as a summer breeze, and thanks.