Several people have messaged me asking for more details about what might disturb me from the outside world so much that I want to change my life and its expectations. I don’t have many answers, and I am not eager to share more information about my life than I already have.

When I think about it, I turn off my cell phone and find something satisfying and meaningful. It’s really that simple.

Then you can do it, rather than think and talk about the disturbing things that keep you up at night. I cheated a bit yesterday when I saw a news alert that caught my eye while trying to buy an electric water bowl online.

I saw a report that President Trump had decided to fire the entire board of the Kennedy Center in D.C. and make himself its President.

At first, I was confused. Was this a scam or a joke? Did he not have enough to do? Then I wondered about Hulk Hogan, a longtime friend of the President,  wrestling on the center stage as he collects the President’s Award. No more Aretha Franklins up there.

Then I stopped laughing. It was a poke in the belly, a wake-up call. Do I need to listen to this or get angry or upset about it? Thanks for the reminder, I thought. I hope you can get back on track.  I turned off the phone. By staying away from the news, I had missed nothing, lost nothing, and slept well.

This is just what I do not need or want in my life. I had nothing to say about it and no practical reason to pay attention. I’m on the right track.

 

 

 

At dinner, we never mentioned this news or the dozens of strange and often troubling stories pouring out of the White House. A shrink once told me there is not enough room in one’s head for evil or irrelevant lousy news. There will be no room for the good stuff.

Instead, she said, include the good aspects of your life—the people you love, the things you love to do, and the good things you do for others.

She said that if you have enough of these things in your head, you will be amazed at how lighter your head and soul will be. You have to make room for good.

I’m filling my head with the good things in my heart and life.

I am amazed by the first three days of my new experience of living calmly and purposefully in the new America. Life was instantly lighter and better for Maria and me when we undertook this experiment. Three days into

I learned as a journalist that there is no reason to listen to the same story 50 times a day when there is nothing new to say or hear about but more endless argument and accusation.

When I heard about the President’s plan to “make music in America great again”- honest, he said that (watch out, Bob Dylan), I immediately went online and bought three boxes of diapers for the Cambridge Food Pantry.

For people thinking of this plan, it means getting off the news and onto life. I can’t emphasize enough the importance of having something meaningful to do.

Instead of being angry, fearful, or too anxious to sleep, I had a great afternoon. I wrote, blogged, took photos, went to the barn, had lunch with Maria, read a mystery, and napped.

Today was the third day of my experiment with Maria: to get through the years without being sad, anxious, or afraid.  I have heart disease, and I am 77 years old. I have good reasons to focus on what is suitable for me, on what feels good to me, on finding people who are not hateful, greedy, ambitious, or dominant men or women.

Worrying or arguing about politics is not a good thing for me to do.

We are going to keep it going.

Linda captured the dilemma well in her message to me Sunday morning: “Thank you so much for this! I’m also going to start practicing it. I’m letting the news ‘get into my head’, and I feel tired physically & emotionally. I read the news on my phone right away in the morning & check it through the day using the excuse that I need to stay informed. So, this will take some deliberate behavior change! In the evening, I ‘visit’ your farm. Your blog posts & photos are meaningful, relaxing & enjoyable.”

Linda’s message struck a chord with me because it echoes the feelings of many others, including me. Yes, Linda, it will be hard, and I suspect you, like me, will need some help.

We tend to think of addiction as mostly about drugs or alcohol, but the truth is much more complicated. I needed to understand that this endless news trolling was an addiction. I was afraid not to do it and obsessed with hearing what was neither reasonable for me nor necessary or informative. Fear is addictive as well.

Linda, who seems both good-hearted and intelligent, may understand that this is not a simple thing to try and do; it goes against the very flow of American life now; the need to check bad and disturbing news day and night is like a person with an addiction might describe an addiction. I’m not diagnosing her; I don’t know her, but fear is an addictive feeling, as are the things that cause it.

She sees the value of my sanctuary idea.

No wonder many struggle to get their heads and feet on the ground. Years ago, the so-called media discovered that most people ignore good news, but they quickly become addicted to bad news because it creates fear, which creates need.

Then, Bob’s message was on the same page: “Jon, it will be constructive to understand your fears and your readers if you give specifics on what is bothering you and your readers. Just stating ‘noise’ makes it sound like a ‘boogeyman’ is lurking in the dreams. To date, democracy has not ended as predicted by some pundits. The majority of the public favors the actions being taken by the current government branches. Not sure why your readers are getting upset. You asked for a cordial dialogue with your readers. Let’s begin a conversation.”

I feel no obligation or desire to argue my beliefs with Bob or take his unwanted writing advice; he can express himself all he wants. But I don’t see it as a healthy approach to persuade strangers worldwide that I am writing the right thing or that I am obliged to share the details of my life and thoughts with every person on the globe.

I could be arguing all day for the rest of my life.

I’m not even sure of what I believe. I just wanted to let you know that I’m not at this point.

The whole point of the new Sanctury Blog is to avoid arguing and expanding on it. This will not happen here. That will take some discipline; a lot of anger is still locked inside of me.

This is the tragedy of modern media; everyone gets half the truth and lives unconscious of the other half. Somebody has to be wrong about something sometimes—no one is taking responsibility for anything,

I am happy for Bob; he is happy. I want the same thing, and Linda does, too. She is not obliged to explain it or argue it with anybody. That is not even close to the conversation we need as a nation.

Ideas have a right to live without being swarmed by people who disagree.

I consider myself empathetic and seek the gift of empathy. To talk to people openly, I’d like to see evidence that they are willing to put themselves in my shoes, and I would need to do the same for them.  That would be nice to see on my blog, but it’s not ready to happen.

That is what I see breaking out all over the country – smugness and contempt, no real conversation or dialogue of any kind.  I’ve been there before, and we all have. Sadly, I’m not going back.

There is nothing there for me.

And yes, both sides do that all the time. That will not be solved on my blog and is outside the range of my skills or intentions. Your feelings are welcome here, Bob, but it won’t happen here until the response does not become an argument.

I hope he stays and speaks his mind. I don’t wish for more argument here, but a zone of safety and free expression, not arrogance or contempt.

So, for all the complications,  the experiment is going well. It won’t be easy.

It fits my need for a spiritual approach. It fits my gift and skills. It fits my need to go good and spiritual work and keep my life devoted not to arguing but to doing good and having meaning. I hope it fits some of yours.

After writing this, I’ll return to the new program, post flowers, and send cat food to the Cambridge Food Pantry. This will work for me, and I can feel it in my bones for Maria. It’s a way of moving on.

Welcome to the Sanctuary Blog.