From the first day, Maria and I have been switching gender roles and positions. Zip, our barn cat, has accelerated the process.

For the first few years in Hebron with Maria,  I was what people used to call the “man” of the house. It was my farm, not our farm. As the years wore on, Maria became the one who made decisions about the farm and the animals; I was the one who took iconic photos while she climbed ladders and rooftops to fix them.

I pity “strong men” who think they are more challenging than strong women, they should go out and find one. Mine has made my life easier and more comfortable from the beginning. Our new cat, Zip, has seen this turn from the inside.

Our Gender Switching was a significant role switch for a former best-selling author and TV producer. When I was young, the men made all the decisions in my family. I became more comfortable with it as I got older and more impressed by my very competent and handy wife. She is a lot smarter than me, and I am not stupid.  I highly recommend to men that they stop being stupid and let strong women rule the home and, soon, the world.

Our Barn Cat, Zip, has been outstanding and controversial since we got him. He’s a fenine rock star, loved all over the world.  But I am the one who worries about him and spoils him rotten.

Maria thinks I’m a squish. We agreed on one thing: he never came to live in the farmhouse. He has no desire to go in, either. Zip’s world is happy and busy; he has everything a barn cat could want, including mice, rats, chipmunks, and moles everywhere.

The animal rights people were unhappy with me (one even called the police to accuse me of abuse for not letting him sleep in the house.) Fortunately, enough animal people in our rural world,  including the sheriff,  who know what a Barn Cat is and understand animals, rushed to my aid. Most of the accusers have been driven into hiding. It’s not easy to make a case that Zip is an abused animal.

Zip turned me into an instant “cat person,” the male equivalent of the cat woman that became a focal point of the presidential election. I’m finally in a group that will accept me.

Maria is much more of a hardass with Zip than I am. He has entered my heart for good. I’m his human, and I constantly fuss and worry over him. She says he can take care of himself, as she can take care of herself. She thinks I’m cute.

As is too often the case, the Animal Rights People were much more interested in hating a human than helping an animal. To do that, you have to know something about them.

They didn’t know that long before they started attacking me, I was worried about Zip and whether he would be warm enough in our often harsh winters.

Maria, who knows much about barn cats, thought I was silly to worry about him. Zip has always lived outside in his three years and loves finding warm spots in the barn and wood shed to sleep.

When it’s snowing, I look out the window and see him dancing, rolling, and catching the occasional mole (once a rat). Why on earth would he rather be inside watching a British Mystery series with an old fart like me?

As winter approached, I pestered Maria to set up the heated cat house we kept for Flo and Minnie (until they were close to death; neither would sleep in it), but Zip was uninterested. Our roles in marriage had changed, and I wouldn’t have considered buying anything for Zip without Maria’s permission. As men get weaker, women get stronger.  She finally relented; I was bugging her.

To our knowledge, Zip had never slept in the heated barn house either, although the sheriff laughed his socks off when he showed up to investigate my alleged abuse.  He knew pretty well that there are more warm places in a hay barn than any farmhouse. Zip does know also know that.

This week, we unplugged the thing. During last week’s brutal cold, Zip slept most of the night in Maria’s wooden box stuffed with leather-lined sheepskin.

He loves it there, day and night. I suspect he’ll find a cozier spot in subzero weather, but it will be up to him, not me.

Maria thinks the pad should go inside the heated barn cat no longer heated. I think it’s a good idea. She says he did go in once or twice..

But I am still anxious about it. Today, a well-reviewed heat pad from Amazon arrived. It has one of these super safe plug-in systems, and we will put it in the barn and plug it in. Maria laughs about it and says Zip will almost surely ignore it also much of the time.

But he’ll have it if he needs it.  The fragility of barn cats is a myth; Zip has a heavy black coat and can find a warm spot if he needs one. So far, he hasn’t. I feel better that Zip has a heated pad to lie on if he needs one. It’s going to be cold this week.

I’ll be watching and taking pictures.

But I know in my heart that it will make me feel good. Between you and me, I suspect he couldn’t care less. He loves his leather wool box. Maria smiles when I talk about it.