“The essence of our practice can be described as transforming suffering into happiness. It’s not a complicated practice, but it requires us to cultivate mindfulness, concentration, and insight. First, we must come home to ourselves, make peace with our suffering, treat it tenderly, and look deeply at the roots of our pain. It requires us to let go of useless, unnecessary suffering and look closer at our idea of happiness. Finally, we must nourish happiness daily with acknowledgment, understanding, and compassion for ourselves and those around us. We offer these practices to ourselves, our loved ones, and the larger community. This is the art of suffering and the art of happiness. We either breathe, ease suffering, or generate joy. With each step, the flower of insight blooms.”
-Thich Nhat Hanh
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It was a hard night for Maria, me, and many others; it felt like I was trapped in a merry-go-round. I went around and around, fear, sorrow, surprise, anger, confusion, and some tears. I cried for the end of my idea of what America means (I always think of my grandmother; America saved her life, and I suppose mine, when she came to our country.)
So many people are happy this morning, and so many are suffering. I am one of them. But I have learned that when I suffer, suffering is not all there is. Happiness belongs to now, not some other place. But there is no happiness without suffering, as I have repeatedly learned. Here is another chance to remind me that grief and joy are not separate.
I sometimes wish I were a donkey or dog, going about business without concern for humans’ complexity.
I don’t understand what happened last night; I feel oddly removed from my country. I will need to understand what happened before I can truly move beyond it, which I intend to do. I need to rethink what America means. There will be a lot of good to come from it.
I decided to move forward and think about what this night would mean for Maria, me, our farm, and our country. I can’t speak for millions, only for me. America was always an idea for me, one of the best ideas ever. We are not seeing the end of America, but our shared values and ideas about her seem to be gone for good.
I love my country, but I must try to figure out what my country is now. I am hopeful.
I intend to turn this pain into good, not hate, as I have always tried to do. Grace is not about dealing with what you want but with life as it is.
My ego got a battering. Hubris can pop like a balloon. I was way off.
I always understood most Americans’ feelings, but I had no idea what was about to happen was going to happen.
As a result, I intend to step away from this world; it is not my world, and I want to focus on the things I love and do well.
I am surrounded in my town by a sea of people who think differently than I do. But these people have been good and welcoming to me in my years here. Many good people see the world differently than me. Everyone has treated me well and respectfully, and I will not succumb to judging or condemning anyone for disagreeing with me.
Perhaps that is Commandment One. Keep working to be a better human being; great opportunities exist.
I got up to think about my new Commandments after the long night:
My commandments:
One: I will not become a hater of anyone who disagrees. That is a poison. I want to respond to yesterday with grace, hope, disappointment, honesty, sadness, and acceptance.
Two: The Army Of Good was born in the Spring of 2016 as a way of doing good rather than hating and arguing. It continues to thrive and do good, and my response to yesterday will be to do more good, the same as before. Suffering can be turned into good. Then, it makes sense to me.
Three: My commitment to the Cambridge Food Pantry is deep, intense, and renewed. Jesus pleaded with us to help those with nowhere to go, and I take that to heart. The pantry work has been a great gift to me and others.
Four: I re-commit myself to supporting my wife in her life and work and supporting women in their search for freedom, equality, and dignity. There is no going back.
Five: I cherish my blog and will continue to work on it every day and improve it in every way. I am also committed to keeping the blog a safe place free of cruelty and hatred. I have finally learned to quench the fire the blog has absorbed inside me.
Six: I am committed to developing my work as an artist through flower photos and photography. Something important is happening inside of me. Thanks so much for your support.
Seven: I am committed to living with animals and nature on Bedlam Farm. They heal and enrich me, and so does the natural world.
Eight: I am committed to a lifetime of meaning while it lasts. That means devoting much of my remaining life to helping those with nowhere to go.
Nine: I am committed to believing that people are good and wish to do good.
Ten. I am committed to the happy lives Maria and I are living together. For the first time in my life, I have everything I want or need; there is nothing I yearn for that I do not have. Politics can never do that for me; I leave them behind until it makes sense.
Politics will never mark my identity of well-being; I will never stick a label on me that chokes off thought.
I will be out here in your internet circle of friends, working to live with the same mindfulness, intention and love that you have so eloquently presented here. I will not drink a poison. I have a beautiful life for which I am so grateful. I will offer service to others as I deepen my relationship to my own soul. Thank you for being the writer and man that you are. This helps on a day when I feel like a caged lion.
Kathy, your message helps me too. Thank you…
Thank you, Jon. Your journal means a lot to me
Thank you..
“This, my dear, is the greatest challenge of being alive: to witness the injustice of this world, and not allow it to consume our light.” – Thich Nhat Hahn
Thank you for your writing today, Jon. I will save this to read again… and again…
Thank you Jon. I woke this morning believing we had a new, talented and caring President-elect only to find the exact opposite. Then things got worse personally when I had a collision this morning. No injuries but car will likely be totalled.
Here’s to a better day
This is the art of suffering and the art of happiness. We either breathe, ease suffering, or generate joy. What a beautiful statement. It puts so much into perspective for me this morning. I cannot yet find “my” country or democracy in all of what has happened, and what likely will happen, for many years. My own years are short, so I will take a deep breath, look for the joy in easing the suffering of others in my own meager ways (Cambridge Food Pantry), and pray. I will immerse myself in your flower art on the big screen each time I feel troubled, or maybe just need a smile. I will not go back. Thank you for this blog and all that it gives to readers. All the best to Bedlam Farm!
Best to you Barbara..
You are a wise and thoughtful man. In the midst of my thinking this is a huge, irretrievable step back for women, you shine the brightest sunlight on my sadness. Thank you, Jon, thank you. Now, on to my own commandments…
Thanks, Diane, it’s not going to come from the outside but the inside..thanks for the lovely message; it was a heartbreaking night… I feel better.
Your thoughtful response to this election is helpful to me. Recently I have started a journey into looking at my energy resources. Results now confirm I was right in making that choice. Rather than get angry, I am going to evaluate and use my feelings in a positive way. Will adopt my own version of your commandments. Thank you!
Thanks Jane, sounds great…
Thank you
Thank you for this, Jon. I needed this today…..and am embracing it (trying to!).
Susan M
Beautifully written Jon! The Phoenix rises from the ashes in new beauty, and with acts of kindness, respect and dignity we too will rise from our personal ashes to bring joy and light into our communities and purpose to our lives! So blessed to call you and Maria my friends! Thank you for being a beacon of hope for so many!🌺
Josie, we both admire you greatly…good luck tomorrow
“The people have spoken.” But I’m not sure what they said.
When we look at leaders like Margaret Thatcher and Angela Merkel, I wonder about the bias Americans have against women as presidents.
Harris’s defeat took the re-election of a president to non-consecutive terms for the first time since Grover Cleveland in 1897.
John, thank you so much for this. It is very helpful to me and dealing with what happened. The vision I had of my country has been shattered. In some ways, I feel I no longer have a country. I need to disengage from the political arena and focus on family, friends, and being connected to my community. I want to spend my remaining time living in as close accordance with my values as I can, and then enjoying every single day to the fullest your blog today helps me do that. By the way, in a completely different manner, I tried to make a donation via PayPal, but they said you were not registered with them and they returned the donation. How can I make a donation that will get through? Again, thank you for this post today and all you do.
Thanks, Ray, nice message, I am registered with Paypal, thanks…[email protected]
Thank you!!
Kamala Harris appears to do most everything for a reason. It’s no mistake that she gave her closing speech in front of a Frederick Douglas bldg. Talk about adversity! And, like you, he chose love and light. I’ll get there too I hope. Meantime I’m thinking: BREAKDOWN…BREAKTHROUGH. Meaning our breakthroughs are as big ( often bigger) as our breakdowns.
“Grace is not about dealing with what you want but with life as it is.”
Words to live by. Such great writing today
Take care. I wish peace for you and Maria zo
Jon, I feel so much better after reading this post. Now I have an idea about transforming my own suffering after Harris’ defeat. I may even write my own commandments. I’ve been steeped in the fundamentals of finding solutions rather than focusing on problems. I’ve been taught that my suffering around the problems is optional. I need to feel all the feelings with the precious pause button, breathe through the hard feelings, ponder my responses, and then proceed with actions. I think that feeling helpless, as if there is nothing I can do to affect change in this world, is one of the ways I can sink underwater. You and your commandment list have shown me that yes, there are things I can do, even in the smallest ways, to make this world a safer and better place. Thank you, Jon.
Suggest you go to Jean’s Diner and talk to the regulars to better understand the thinking for voting for Trump.
Thanks, Bob; I don’t need to go to a diner to understand voting for Trump better. I can go right next door, across the street, and anywhere else in my town. We talk about it all the time here, both sides.
Thank you Jon & Maria, for being some of the those “billion brilliant stars” in my life.
Your words give me strength and courage to move ahead looking for all the light I can find in these dark times.
Namaste.
As I watch the sunrise on this first day after “the day after,” I am heartened, strengthened, and extraordinarily grateful for your words’ calm and grounding wisdom. I am noticing my feelings and my emotions today as well, compared to 2016, and am resolved to “not going back.” For so many reasons and in so many ways. This individual, this outcome, will not consume me or my good life and how I move forward for the remainder of it. In a beautiful and unbidden way, it has quieted my heart and opened my eyes even wider to see and to cherish what matters most. Kindness. Compassion, Curiosity. Grace.
Thanks, Leslie, for a beautiful and honest message.