“…those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must undergo the fatigue of supporting it. The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain is too cheap and esteem it too lightly; dearness only gives everything its value.” – Thomas Paine.

Of all the visionaries who labored for years to free our country, Thomas Paine was the most influential for me.

In his writing, he reminds me that freedom is not accessible, simple, or easy to keep. And only some people will like you fighting for it.  

Today, the founding fathers are rarely quoted by the many people who ignore their warnings and turn to conspiracy theorists, dishonest politicians, and liars to steal and distort the idea of freedom and betray it.

Our country is fighting a severe struggle for freedom. Although I am much less important than our country, I relate to the idea of freedom and its implications for all of us. If we don’t fight for it, everyone can lose it.

Our political crisis is too complex, huge, and uncertain for me to write about today. I can relate to it personally, which is true of all.

Instead of the big picture, I’d like to write about my idea of freedom on this holiday—now the holiday is more about traffic and hot dogs and reservations than freedom, but I believe I have to think of it almost every day.

And I feel I have the need. As Paine said, there is a fatigue in supporting that, but I think it, too. It seems a struggle that never ends, for me or you.

I’m not the most important thing happening right now, but I can only make sense of freedom if I shrink it to a level I can articulate and others might understand.  

Craven and dishonest politicians are not the only things threatening freedom; I feel that our descent into the world of social media and the life of computers is doing its best right now to take it away from us.

Many of you do and will disagree with me. That’s okay. I don’t need to be agree just understood, I need to be honest, interesting and thoughtful.

As a writer for almost all of my life, I take being free seriously. The thing about America that means the most to me is that I must constantly fight for it, as Paine warned.  

Billions of people have access to my writing every day worldwide, and every day, one or more find something not to like about it.

My test is to protect my freedom and maintain my humanity and civility. I often fail.

Social media has given all kinds of powerless people the power to invade and challenge the free thought of strangers anywhere in the world.

I had two exchanges last week that I want to write about today and share my feelings about them out in the open. People who seek power never like to let go ot it, which is why social media is getting so cruel and nasty.  

I’m in the thick of it, like it or not. I have lots of opinions and share them all the time.

I’ve come to believe that social media is most often not promoting freedom but stifling it and choking it with endless attacks on strangers people know nothing about and have no business interfering with or passing judgment on.

I know far too many people with good ideas who fear posting online, knowing someone somewhere will attack them, often cruelly and ignorantly.

I don’t take my freedom for granted; I will fight for it whenever I feel the need to, right or wrong. People who would silence me or tell me what I can and should say on my blog are enemies of freedom, whatever they think they are.

Social media has given many broken people a lot of power, and I see them abusing it daily.

I will repeat again and again that  I started my blog 15 years ago as a memoir, an account of a life, not an account of other people’s lives.  

Yes, it is mostly about me; memoirs are about their authors. It’s not about everyone else.

I am the person who expresses my thoughts about the evolution of my thinking and my evolution as a human,  not other people’s thinking. I am often told that I don’t care what others think of my writing, which is true.

I don’t write seeking the advice of strangers, many of whom are hostile to anyone thy think is powerful. It’s not a reality show.  

I have gotten to know several good and thoughtful people through my blog, and I listen to them and welcome and invite their thoughts.

But I don’t write based on what others think; I write based on what I believe. That’s the whole point of a memoir. I’m not running for public office or making decisions by poll or the opinions and criticism of strangers I know nothing about.

These two exchanges below help me explain and articulate my notion of freedom related to my blog.

I hope they help others understand it, but if they don’t, go your way in peace, but go.

I publish a take-it-or-leave-it blog; I’m not looking for or needing approval or uninvited thoughts about my writing from strangers.  I have never asked for that or promised it.

Billions of people can read my blog, which is free and open if they wish to.

No, I am not interested in all of their opinions of me. Every good writer in history listens to him or herself, takes his or her chances, and accepts their fate. It is a profoundly self-centered calling. It requires quiet time and space to think.  Endless hostility and anger take my freedom away.

E.B. White, the New Yorker Columnist (One Man’s Meat) who  inspired the Bedlam Farm Journal, once told complaining readers, “There is one of me and ten thousand of you.”  

Times have changed; there is one of me and billions of you.  I am not open to all of your opinions about every word I write.  I could not survive that.

Individuality and freedom are about continuous discussion and argument, not rudeness, intrusion, presumption, death threats and bad manners.

Read my blog if you can, and thank you. I share my life; I don’t give it away to you. I’m not taking a poll on my likeability.  I don’t need or wish to be explaining or defending myself for every word I write to people I don’t know and care little about me, if anything.

My job is to be honest about my life and thoughtful about what I write.  I don’t owe a soul more than that.

I listen to those I know, those I trust, and those who wish me well or are civil and thoughtful.

 

_____

 

Yesterday, I got this message from Mary. I was writing about politics and was annoyed with a post that had nothing to do with my writing. Here was the exchange:

 

” Mary: Curious. You certainly are not interested in hearing what others think of you. Respect is a one-way street?

My response:

Thanks, Mary. I’m curious about what you sent me. I hear what people think about me every day of my life, but the truth, as I’ve said many times, is that my blog is the story and evolution of what I think of me, good or bad, not what you or often hostile people on Facebook think of me.

Why, I wonder, do you follow my writing if you feel so little of me and are sure I don’t want to hear it? … I’m not running for political office, and my life will never be shaped by 3 billion strangers on social media or polling.

You know nothing about me, and I know nothing about you. I don’t see much respect for me in your message. How could there be? That’s not how I shape my precious time on the planet.

___

Then Josh, who felt  I wanted to hear his criticism of my response to a blog poster named J—

 

From Josh: What name did J– call you? He criticized your ideas, not you. There’s nothing ad hominem in that post. If you’re going to write controversial things, you need a thicker skin.

 

Here is the message Josh thinks was not ad hominem, although I can’t swear I know what that means. (Ok, I did look it up: it means (of an argument or reaction) directed against a person rather than the position they are maintaining. Am I losing it like our President, or is this precisely what Josh’s friend did in his message? Decide for yourself.”

 

“From Jay to me: Man, you keep doubling down on this Biden-will-drop-out nonsense, even as it’s becoming clearer and clearer to anyone with an ounce of political savvy that it’s ain’t going to happen. I can’t wait to see what you say when you’re proved wrong. Hee hee!”

My response to Jay:

Hey Jay, welcome. You are the first snarky and insulting note on this post, which is impressive for a political post in America. You’re welcome to run your mouth off here, as I often do, but a rule has been in place for a few months and works great for me. Disagree with me all you wish, but no name-calling here on the blog, my digital home. Name-calling is rude and adolescent – Middle School comes to mind – persuades no one and achieves nothing. You have no idea what my political background is or what I am like and are too lazy to ask, as happens often on social media. Best Jon

Jay’s welcome annoyed me in tone and content. As a former political writer for newspapers like the Boston Globe, Washington Post, and Philadelphia Inquirer, I take the presidential crisis seriously.

It’s not funny to me.  It will greatly affect my idea of freedom.

I also found his giggling over the prospect of my being wrong annoying. His suggestion that I couldn’t possibly have an ounce of political savvy because I disagreed with him was not “ad hominem.” If he wants to talk politics with me on my blog, I would ask for some actual thought and respect for people who disagree with him (something I have often struggled to do.)

P.S. Jay is also dead wrong about the presidential crisis; Biden is in awful trouble and has admitted he is fighting for his life.

I do not need to laugh at Jay for being arrogant, pompous, and almost certainly wrong.

Only the weak-minded are afraid to be wrong. I don’t need to be angry either.

But on my blog, which I work very hard to publish, I have the right to say whatever I wish, justified or correct or not. For me, this Fourth of July is a question of freedom, for me and the rest of us.

People like Jay (and Josh, for that matter) can do much harm. If I’m wrong, which is quite possible, Jay might have very little to hee-hee about.

If that’s thin-skilled, I’ll take it. I can’t respond to anyone’s posts without someone else getting offended and calling me names.

I am always amazed at the number of people who ignore what I work hard to write and tell me instead how to respond to posters on my blog. That would be my definition of arrogance and needing real work.

This growing rain of intrusion, interference, awful manners, and presumption online does more harm to freedom of speech than almost any politician can do or has done.

And while I’m at it, Josh, don’t you have something better to do than analyze my blog posts and tell me how to respond to them?  What business is it of yours?  And why do you assume I want to know?

How would you react if I sent you a message like that? You seem to take yourself quite seriously.

I’ll go with Thomas Paine over Jay’s flippant trivializing of our crisis and of me. Freedom does require us to fight for it all the time, in every way we can.  We are all learning the consequences of forgetting that and taking it for granted.  The message did piss me off.

I’d love to have a thicker skin.  I know I need one for the work I do. But it wouldn’t be good for me. I like to feel things.

People often tell me to take it if I dish it, but I’m not in the business of dishing it out to usually broken strangers. I want to write about my life and what  I am learning. I’m not changing my mind.

____

 

And here is a message from someone I know and trust who e-mails me frequently, like many other excellent and thoughtful people.

Some are critical; some are comforting. I am grateful for their comments, always expressed with consideration and empathy.

I learn a lot from them. They never tell me what I should write, think, or feel. They have often urged me to be less angry and more tolerant.

They never make me feel that my freedom is being challenged.  They mean no harm and think about things rather than shout about them. I am happy to listen to them any day or any time.

They have encouraged me to be a better human. I’m working on it. But see how one of the people I listen to thinks. Compare this message to Jay’s.

“Kaaren: One must respect individuals as they are, not what we wish them to be. Differences are what makes people so interesting. Aging is an adventure; one learns new things about oneself daily and dares to be oneself, not caring what others think. Continue to grow, Jon, you’re doing great.”

Thanks, Kaaren; I am doing well.I hope I never stop growing. And thanks for your message.

As you know, I happily admit and acknowledge my many flaws. It’s the point of my life right now.

I have a lot of work to do to be the person I want to be.

One thing I want to be is free, and I will never take that for granted or stop fighting for it. I was raised and taught by people who knew first-hand what can happen when tolerance for free thought fades.

The people who take freedom away never give it back without a struggle.

I wish everyone a meaningful and peaceful holiday. I hope you will think about freedom as I do, in your way and with your thoughts. That’s what it is all about.

___

 

“Freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed.” – Martin Luther King Jr.