I am proud of our dinner and the food I brought home; it was a hit. In addition to the Lobster Tail meat, we had roasted potatoes and crispy Kale from our garden. The candlelight meal (with Gracie Abrams singing in the background) had a harvest feel. I’m glad I got two bags of lobster meat and tail. It was devoured quickly with the help of melted butter in a bowl and a nutcracker.
Maria and I have been through an intense month or so. I had my concussion and collapse; she has been selling yarn, potholders, and quilts steadily. We both wanted a day together, centering on the now, on our excellent life and love together. We succeeded. We had one of the sweetest holidays either of us can recall.
We sat in the chairs out back, walked all over the farm, meditated, read together, talked, and laughed talked. My Edgar Allen Poe statue arrived just in time for dinner. I am a Poe fan and identify with his torment and occasional darkness. He was also a genius. It was nice having him to dinner.
We had a great discussion about how to gauge one another’s creativity.
It was also lovely having Zip around yesterday; he and I chatted several times and exchanged world views. He is a beautiful addition to the farm and to my life.
America being America, I was amazed (still naive, I guess) that my dinner managed to be controversial and sparked the only nasty messages of the day. I will never understand why people want to tell me what I am eating and spend their time and energy fighting about it. I can’t imagine doing that. We are becoming a nation of complainers and correctors.
Two people told me my food was lobster meat, not lobster tail. Belinda Betz called me a “know-it-all asshole” for saying my lobster was tail, not meat. (The fish store tells me it was lobster tail that they cracked and put into bags to sell. That’s good enough for me.)
“Your picture is of lobster meat,” Belinda wrote in her angry message, “not lobster tails. Both are good and expensive, but they are not the same thing. If you want to argue with you otherwise, don’t put up a picture. Read your label and stop being such a know-it-all asshole.”
Am I supposed to care about this, I wondered? I’m not taking the bait.
As I often do, I felt saddened at the idea that Belinda has nothing to worry about other than what kind of lobster I am eating and what I call it or was told it is. Sorry, but I’ll pass on the chance to study the label as closely as she did. To be truthful, I don’t care. I deleted her message.
Not that she cares, Larry, who has worked on lobster boats and lives in Maine, injected some rationality:
“I grew up on the coast of Maine, and I’m living here still. I’ve worked on lobster boats. I’ve eaten a ton of lobster in my 74 years. I know a little something about lobsters. I know you don’t need me to confirm what you’ve already said, but I’m seeing two pieces of lobster tail on that plate. The Belindas of the world have way too much time on their hands.”
Thanks, Larry, truth is still important to some people, it makes me hopeful.
Maria summed up these messages well as she often does: “how dumb, and what a waste of time.” Well put.
When I think of what is happening in much of the world, I can’t get into a fight about what I’m calling my lobster or what I was told it is.
I’m sorry this makes me a know-it-all asshole, Belinda; it was a great meal, and I am very proud of it, and we had a day of feeling gratitude for one another and our lives together. Maria said it was the best Thanksgiving meal she had ever had. That is what is essential to me.
I’m sorry that was not worthy of her notice.
I did have an interesting thought after reading her message. I felt gratitude that my tough and brilliant daughter Emma would never write a letter like that to anyone, stranger or not. Neither would I.
We did a good job with Emma in that way. I admire her decency, among other things.
Maria and I found a good way for us to celebrate Thanksgiving. We devoted the day to one another and the opportunity to reconnect after a grueling month or two that was distracting and draining. We discussed always remembering what is good in life, not just what is bad.
Yesterday, we were in the best place, and sorry, Belinda, Lobstergate will not deter us in any way. Have a good time fighting about it; it won’t be with me.
There are worse things than being a know-it-all asshole. I hope you decide not to be one of them.
Thanksgiving left a glow both of us felt. We hope to work for half a day this morning and then resume our holiday over the weekend. We don’t want to lose that feeling so soon. And I have even more lobster tail in the freezer (yes, I freeze it).
I’ve decided to go to that fish store once a month to enrich our diet. Poe is going into my office. He inspires me. Life goes on.
You don’t understand why people want to tell you what you are eating, but I don’t understand why you want to tell people what you are eating, or why anyone would care. So there’s that to think about too.
Something for you to think about Anne. I share my life, that is the point of my blog. Why are you reading it and sending messages about absolutely nothing? Your message has a snooty and superior vibe. I wrote about our dinner because people are interested in that and it’s important to me. Sorry you didn’t get it. This place is for people with something thoughtful to say, not only for what you care about. You need to be passing your bile somewhere else.You seem to be the only person around who couldn’t figure out why I was writing about the food I boughg. It’s your issue, not mine.It’s my blog, I work hard on it, and I don’t need your approval for what I write. Don’t bring it here.
To put in my 2 cents worth, I think your Thanksgiving meal looks absolutely delicious (and healthy). Made my mouth water just looking at the picture.
I grew up on the coast of Maine, and I’m living here still. I’ve worked on lobster boats. I’ve eaten a ton of lobster in my 74 years. I know a little something about lobsters. I know you don’t need me to confirm what you’ve already said, but I’m seeing two pieces of lobster tail on that plate. The Belindas of the world have way too much time on their hands.
Thanks Larry bless you
Good for you, Jon. And glad that your luscious Thanksgiving meal was so delicious (the photo of it looks wonderful). Continue to give thanks for ALL that you have!
Your dinner looks like a tasty treat, lovingly prepared. I’m glad you and Maria had a beautiful Thanksgiving! I’m thankful to be part of our amazing zoom group and to be able to call you and Maria my friends! Enjoy the rest of this weekend.
Josie, same here, thanks for existing and for your positive and creatie view on life..you are teaching me a lot…
Your meal looks beautiful and perfect ! Fresh and healthy ingredients prepared with love., who could ask for more? I won’t even tackle *lobster gate* as you referred to it……..but in some odd, twisted way……Belinda’s message just made me laugh. Some people………..
Susan M
That’s a healthy responde all the way, I’m learning to do the same thing…
Your meal looks absolutely delicious! Glad you and Maria are having such a special Thanksgiving. My Mexican food was delicious and I finished Richard Osman’s latest book.
This is so crazy! I loved seeing your delicious meal for Thanksgiving! Last year on Thanksgiving day I flew out here to So.Cal to our daughters! My husband drove me to Pittsburgh to the airport. He then turned around and went home. He was moving into our son’s house but was still emptying out our apartment and still had cleaning up to do. When he got home he turned the oven on and heated two turkey pot pies up for his Thanksgiving dinner! He likes them and was happy to have them. The thing was, it also just happened to be his Birthday! It will not be a forgotten day nor will your dinner! Love reading about your life! Please don’t stop!!!!!
Belinda’s message made me shake my head. Then, as you would have done in the past Jon, I got mad. Why does she feel the need to be so harsh and critical. I could have had a few choice words for her myself. Then I got to wondering if maybe she’s nasty because she can’t afford lobster meat or tail or any of it and resents it. Why is she even reading your blog? It’s truly a mystery to me. And then the person who complains that you write about what you eat. Just about everyone I know does that. This whole back and forth is a complete mystery to me. Until there was an internet, I used to think I understood people. Guess what. Your dinner looked luscious to me. Happy Thanksgiving to you and Maria. And I was mostly focused on the kale!
That looked sooo delicious!! Heck, it’s your food, call it what you like. Anyone who has such little regard for what’s truly important isn’t worth your time. Belinda is the new Karen, eh? My youngest elementary music school students had a saying that when you point your finger at someone else, you’ve got 3 in your hand pointing right back at you – don’t belittle others, you’re only belittling yourself.
Lobster tail or lobster meat? Blah, blah, blah. I don’t care what part of the lobster it is, it’s all delicious. We had deep fried turkey with all the trimmings. Thoroughly enjoyed it & I’m glad y’all did too.
Are you sure that woman’s name is Belinda? Or is it Karen?
I love to hear about what people are eating. Good food is such an important part of my life. And living in Colorado, I’d give just about anything to have access to fresh lobster. Sounds like a sublime Thanksgiving dinner!
If people have nothing nice to say……..
Please…please…please! Send me an invitation to your next Thanksgiving Dinner.!
Shalom and Bon Appetite!
I don’t eat seafood. But that meal looks lovely.
To quote my maternal grandmother, SOMEONE got up from the wrong side of bed!
Enjoy the rest of your weekend.
As Jon Katz wrote about Belinda and what she said, and as he deleted her message, he might have shouted as did Poe’s raven, “Never more.”
The stories you and Maria share
🌞 brighten 🌞 my day ~
every day.
Thank you!!
I loosely follow your blog when I decide to take some time to sit and peruse facebook. I enjoy what I read here and thoroughly respect your life choices. I am always stunned when people respond so harshly on subjects that should be none of their concern. Flip pass, hit delete, unsubscribe but don’t be cruel. As I was told as a child: If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. Bless you and your wonderful life!
Good grief! I think writing about your food choices is a good thing. It gives others with a sugar problem (like myself) some ideas about eating healthier. As far as the name calling, I don’t always agree with you and I’m sure you probably wouldn’t agree with some of my thoughts – but never and I mean never would I send anyone a nasty message like that. I hope you didn’t let this color your Thanksgiving.
Speaking of giving thanks…Lobstergate aside…six years ago on Thanksgiving we were traveling to the Pennsylvania family with some venison from a deer my husband had shot on our property and other Thanksgiving offerings. On the way there he had a seizure…while driving!…but was able to get the car to the side of the road. After getting him to the closest hospital, a mass was discovered. Luckily it was benign, but we weren’t sure of that until it could be removed three months later, successfully and with no lasting effects. I’m sure you can imagine the traumatic effect of this event, given your own experience. It is one of many life events for which we are most grateful. Note the anagram of my maiden and married name- serendipity/ synchronicity/ wonder
Everything I post gets me negative comments, which I simply delete and move on with my life. As for your Thanksgiving dinner, I think it’s amazing. I also approve of Edgar Allen Poe being included with the festivities! I am jealous that you had lobster for Thanksgiving, as ours was traditional.
Thanks Thomas, life in America…