I used to love to write around midnight when it was dark and quiet, and the world was silent. Free of distractions, I could think.

This afternoon’s rain has been torrential; I took this photo when I woke up from my food poisoning fog and saw the torrents of water pouring down the roof. Our dog Bud, a usually brave Boston Terrier, trembles at the thunder and is curled up in my lap, shaking. Zinnia was at my feet, Maria in her studio working; she checked in on me but left me alone if she saw me sleeping.

I don’t remember too much of yesterday; I slept from 6 a.m. to noon and then again, from 2 p.m. to 8 p.m. I’m not yet ready to sleep again; this is a sweet moment; the rain is just quieting. I woke up meditating about Goodness and faith. Silence is precious.

I especially love writing in the quiet and the dark. No cars, no trucks, no information pouring in on me like a tsunami. I was thinking about faith when I woke up.

I think everybody in the world believes in something. No one is an unbeliever. Organized religion is not the only way to have faith. I think that I become what I believe, what my faith is; we all draw from a well of inspiration, observations, and experience. Some are ours; some are borrowed.

The midnight silence is holy to me; it brings me back to what it means to be a human and pushes the chaos away.

We decided to sleep downstairs tonight in case I got sick again. When I came into my office to write this, Zinnia followed suit and took her position by my chair. Knowing she is there, chewing on a bone, or sleeping, is always comforting. Maria is asleep in the living room next to me. How fortunate to have such support.

Silence is the best friend of thought.

When I looked at the news today, I shivered as I often do and felt some fear and worry.

And I thought about how Goodness has become my faith. I believe in goodness because however powerful and vibrant evil seems to be, the idea contradicts it – and my belief –  that good is the highest aspiration of humanity.

I believe in love rather than hate because love brings out the best in us, the best feeling, the most spiritual, and the most affirming. Good makes us bigger; hate makes us smaller. I believe in the people whose hearts I hold in my hands because I am myself nourished by good and love and depleted by hate and anger.

A religious friend of mine told me that the God who created hate also created an alternative for us too choose – love and good. I can’t control what others say, do, feel, or tell them what to believe. I can only control what I say and feel and what I think. I chose goodness.

I don’t know if God is real, but the idea of God fundamental to many people. That makes the picture very real. I respect it.

I look inside myself for the answers about my faith, who I want to be, and what I wish to believe. The globe is in our hands; life is at our mercy. I have faith in Goodness.

I’m getting weary again and will head back to the living room to try and sleep. Thanks for sharing this quiet moment with me.