Lucy came to the Memory Care Unit of the Mansion a few months ago. She was struggling to adjust in what is almost always a jarring transition.

One of her aides in Memory Care contacted me and said she thought Lucy needed some help; she wondered if I could help her get one of the very realistic baby dolls I have been getting for a growing number of Mansion residents over the past couple of years.

I know they have made an enormous difference. Yesterday, I got a letter from Lucy’s daughter thanking me for bringing her mother the baby doll, which the aides say has made a profound difference to her and helped her make a loving and peaceful transition to this new stage of life.

In my years of work at the Mansion, I’m not sure anything I’ve done or asked the Army Of Good to do has done more to make the extremely elderly happy than these life-like dolls. Watching Lucy read to her doll today was wrenching, loving, and beautiful. The aides say she is a different person.

First, her daughter thanked me: “You go the extra mile, doing what you do, and ordered my mom her new baby doll. My heart has exploded with your kindness and thoughtfulness. I almost couldn’t believe it when they told me that Beauty was actually at the Mansion for my mom.”

Natalie told me a story I have often heard at the Mansion – a son or daughter’s struggle to witness a parent’s decline and bring them to assisted care. That is often a decision that carries enormous guilt and pain. She had been Lucy’s caretaker at home for two years and finally was overwhelmed and asked for help. I know the story well.

She was losing herself; she said, “caring for the woman who loves me the most, but it was the best decision.”

The doll, she said, has made her happy about her decision. “Mom loves her new baby; we were laughing too. I mentioned that she even has her nose.” I was thrilled to get this message; Lucy seemed to be having a new time until she got her baby doll.

We went over to the Mansion today to see how she was doing. Lucy is a student who comes to my Meditation Class on Tuesdays.

She was busy with her baby – talking to her, reading to her, feeding her, holding her. Memory care is intensely complex and challenging for the staff. It’s sometimes hard t know what the residents need or want or what will comfort them. So often, they can’t explain themselves or talk about their feelings.

I can’t overstate how vital these life-like cats, dogs, and dolls have been to some, not all, the residents at the Mansion and the Memory Care unit.

I see that many older people – especially women – are left with a massive hole in their lives when they come to the Mansion and are no longer responsible for their lives, needs, and care they have provided to their spouses and children, and grandchildren for all of their adult lives.

They need something to hold and love, of course, and to fuss and worry about.

But I see they also need another entity to be responsible for – to worry about, clothe, keep warm, hold at night, and talk to when the loneliness strikes.

These realistic animals and dolls made an immediate and profound difference in people’s lives in assisted care, nursing homes, and memory care units.

They light up, smile, and stop drifting or seeming shocked into silence or passivity. They talk and remember things. Their loneliness and confusion ease, and they have a powerful reason to get up and focus on something they love.

All kinds of people at the Mansion, from published poets to former executives to tough and burly men, have loved these life replicates, thanked me profusely for them, and told me they are immensely grateful.

They bring them to meals and give them baths, keep them warm and clean, buy them clothes, sleep with them, sit in the dark when they are alone and afraid, and hold them in their laps.

I’ve bought more than 20 realistic animals and dolls for the Mansion residents; everyone has succeeded enormously. I buy the more expensive ones; I’ve found the cheaper ones break down quickly and don’t last long. If they break down, that can be a severe blow to their new friends and caretakers.

These dolls evoke and replicate life at a time when many people think they have nothing to live for and no one cares about them.

I’m going to the Mansion at least twice a week now, to Memory Care on Mondays and to Meditation Class on Tuesdays. In the Fall, I’ll resume my work with a new class of refugees coming to Sue Silverstein and Bishop Gibbons.

Visiting Lucy today made me very happy and proud of the work we have done and will do.

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I’ll be asked to get more realistic dolls for the Mansion and Memory Care  Units.  They make an enormous difference.

Donations to the Mansion Fund pays for things like shoes, sweaters, baby dolls, cats, and dogs. If you can and wish, you can do so via Paypal, [email protected], or Venmo, Jon Katz@Jon-Katz-13.

You can also donate by check, Jon Katz, Mansion Fund, P.O. Box 205, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816. Thank you.