We thought last Thursday was the day the bandages came off, and the stitches came out, but we were off by a week; that procedure is scheduled for this coming Thursday; it can’t come soon enough.

The surgery took more out of me than I realized, and I saw today that my strength and energy were finally returning to me; it took longer than I thought it would, but then, I am older than I sometimes realize. Surgery is surgery.

The extra time has given me a different perspective. There is no pain or discomfort in my foot; my balance is not affected; I walked more today than I have in a long time. I am tired but thrilled.

Soon, the specialists will start building a second brace, and my years-long struggle to walk normally will be successful (even if it means wearing a brace, or especially if it means wearing a brace.

Soon, people will stop looking at me with pity and deep concern and stop being pleasantly surprised that I am alive. It was a big deal, but not that big a deal.

Minah, a waitress at Jean’s restaurant and a kind person, said something this morning that was important to me – she said women who have undergone hysterectomies also feel that something important was lost, and a part of them was taken. That part is a lot more important than the part I lost.

The staff at Jean’s (we had breakfast there this morning, our favorite brunch place again) are all social workers, in a sense, as many good servers are. Ninah saw my surgical boots and wanted to know what happened. They seem to care.

Sitting on the front steps with Zinnia and my gargoyle was revelatory. I feel excellent. It is over now; the bandage is just a formality.

My decision to get the toe removed – however squirmish it made me – was an excellent decision. I feel perfect about it and am eager to finish the job of walking often, well, and comfortably. The toe was in the way; the toe had to go.

I wish I’d done it a couple of years ago.

But still, there are always things to learn.

I learned that I no longer bounce back from these things in a day or two as I used to. I can feel the body recovering at its own pace. But this weekend, I still feel tired but almost fully recovered.

Rest and quiet made all the difference. In a couple of weeks, I have a different kind of surgery in the hospital – would wave bombardment that can (no guarantees) shatter and remove a growing kidney stone that is causing some trouble.

It has no pain, and I hope to keep it that way.

I will take the surgery seriously, invasive or not, and make sure to allow time to rest. I think I am around 40 years old. It’s time to get real.