I was pretty pleased with my progress and plans for my health this now and through the Summer. I’m working through my Cinque or five-point health plan, it is going well, or so I thought.

Not everyone felt so.

I got a lot of supportive messages today about my plan. I also got one from someone who says he is someone named Bob Lysaught. He was not happy with my positive thoughts about my health:

“What about your weight as it has been a chronic health problem for you and one in six American adults suffering from it? Obesity is closely related to several other chronic diseases, including heart disease, hypertension, type 2 diabetes, sleep apnea, certain cancers, joint disorders, and more which you also suffer from (Obesity Medical Association https://obesitymedicine.org/why-is-obesity-a-disease/ ). Your photos depict your weight problem, and you have alluded to doctors’ suggestions to address your weight. With your upcoming toe surgery, your weight issue will be a battle due to your inactivity during recovery.”

I blocked Bob as a part of my new delete/block jerks program. I am not interested in arguing with him or explaining why his list is grossly inaccurate or that I am not interested in his loopy medical opinions. Thank God for my real doctors.

If I had all or even half of the illnesses and problems he lists, I’d be long dead or paralyzed, and the truth is I am happy, loud, and full of myself. I guess it really is okay online to make things up.

I am healthy. I do not doubt it. For me, health is as much about how I feel as it us how much I weigh. There are a lot of other factors as well. I feel very good. It’s a sign of the time – distinguished doctors surround me, and here is Bob, advising me that I am fat and near death.

We live in a great country. If I stop laughing, I might die. The worst thing about getting old for me is that people keep asking me how my health is in a voice of deep concern.  That is really annoying. I’m not into self-pity or suffering.

There are all kinds of people in our world. On the eve of my surgery, some wish me well and are thinking of me.

And one calls me obese, cancer-ridden, hypertense, and near death and presumes to diagnose me as if there were no doctors in the world and I didn’t have any.

Wishful thinking Bob; I’m not there yet, and my doctors say I’m doing fine.

Social media survivors are strong and determined people. We don’t break easily and are allergic to liars.

Maybe Bob should try Hallmark E-Cards or flowers. Or speak to a real doctor and get some help for himself. There are worse things than death.

I didn’t delete Bob’s post because I wanted to remind myself and the good people who read my blog why being honest, open, and willing to share one’s life is essential, especially in our upside-down country.

My motto is never to let the peckerheads, toothless ducks, and midgets (a/k/a little people) get me down.

The blog is my memoir, and I can’t hide the truth. Bob speaks a lot of lies but some truth as well. I am getting older and need to lose some weight. There, I’ve said it. Did he think I didn’t know it?

I’m in a good place; I like who I am and getting comfortable with how I look and look in the mirror, although seeing an older man in those pictures rattles me. He does look too big and a bit stooped; I’m working on it. Diabetes is tough on the weight.

Putting one’s life out there is difficult and quite often painful.

It is also essential. Honesty and authenticity are rapidly vanishing from the digital world as the Bobs single out their victims and work hard to make them feel shittier and bad about their appearance or health. Social media is a creative space; you can make up all kinds of bullshit and send it for free to anyone you wish.

No cost and no penalty. I am understanding the idea that men can be both vulnerable and strong at the same time. I feel vulnerable at times these days; I’ve never felt stronger. I can’t explain it.

It is also selfish for me. This hostility and intrusion is how I have learned to frame my identity, strength, and versatility. It challenges me to know myself. It’s about how we teach and learn from one another about what it means to grow older or even soft in the belly.

Bob probably has no idea that he is being rude, hostile, and ignorant all at the same time.

It isn’t my business—shame on his mother.

I don’t care to diagnose him or pretend to know his problem. I hope he gets the help he needs, as I am doing.

Many hollow people like Bob – lost souls to me –  are out there, and living with them is vital to being creative, grounded, and honest.

I write this hoping people who wish to share their work – their stories, experiences, insights – especially creatives and the young- do not back away, hide, run, or hide because of people like Rob. Indeed, they are not worth it. I will never give in to them.

Many are hurting out here; they seem to have nowhere else to go to feel valuable or important. My idea is to accept the reality of them but never cave to it.

I would urge people –  especially young people – not to be run off, hurt, or discouraged by people like Bob.

They have worse troubles than you or me. I am learning to feel for them and even pray for them occasionally. When I used to get really angry at them, I imagined being one of them, and I felt better and better about myself. I felt fortunate.

They can do that for you, as they have done it for me if you let them.

It seemed wrong to me to return anger with anger and hate with hate. I gave it up.

I don’t like to tell other people what to do.

But I would urge anyone who wishes to live freely in the open not to quit because of social media trolls, vultures, and disturbed people.

You can come out the other side as I have and learn to love who you are and even forgive them, no matter what anyone else says.

There are lessons for me. Maria always wants to take pictures of me, and I’ve been shy since I’ve gotten older and chunkier. That needs to stop. I am who I am and proud of who I am. And I am getting old.

Finally, no one can take pride from me.

My job is, to be honest and authentic about my life.

In our culture, we will pay the price for being open. And we can also reap its great rewards. I have nothing to fear, nothing to hide. I am happy to be able to write freely and openly about my life. The Bobs are a small price to pay.

The Internet is great in many ways, but it has erased many people’s very ideas of manners, decency, privacy, and compassion.

I am blessed to be able to fight for those things and to practice them into my life.

It’s a very cheap toll. I’ll gladly pay to be free and be me.