In her essay Fulfillment, Joan Chittister writes that most life is one long emotional revolving door. We are busy, busy, busy every single moment.

But then, somewhere amid the emotional throes of middle age and beyond, we settle in and settle down.

This has been true of me. One of the most important lessons I’ve learned as I grow older is that most crises are not really crises at all. They are simply life. Along the way, I stopped being so intense, dramatic, and fearful. I began to find a balance.

Whenever I am sick or face a different health issue, people speak to me as if I am in a grave and shocking crisis. But I no longer feel this way. My idea for aging is to accept it, not hide or run from it.

I am just experiencing life at 75, where every human being is or will be.  By the time aging became a reality and not just a fear, acceptance had prepared me to meet change and loss calmly,  even-handedly, sometimes fearlessly, and even cheerfully, much as I learned to do when a beloved dog or animal died. What do we expect will happen?

At long last, I can look life in the eye, stare it down, and meet it on my own terms, not everyone else’s.