At my Mansion Meditation Class on Tuesday, I read passages from books by Thomas Merton, Henri Nouwen, and Joan Chittister.
Chittister wrote about the stereotypes of the elderly; the image may have of them as doddering, confused, and helpless. The residents bristled at these stereotypes and said they all had heard them, often from their own families.
(Above, Michael, a member of the meditation class.)
“It’s just not true,” said June, “I’ve slowed down, but I know what is happening around me.”
I told them that one of the things I taught my creative writing students was that their stories were necessary; we were all, I said, on the exact search: for a life of passion, purpose, and joy. I wrote that there is no reason you can’t have such a life today or at any age.
I asked how many of them felt the stories of their lives were meaningful and worth telling. All but three raised their hands.
“How about we start a new class next week?” I asked, “I’ll write down your stories and collect them, and we’ll self-publish a small book. I’m sure we can give copies to your families, and the bookstore will sell them there.”
The residents got excited; everyone wanted to participate, even three from Memory Care. We’ll get the families’ approval, and I’ll set up a new writing class at a different time. It is essential that these people feel that their stories are worth telling, and a significant boost for them to see their stories in book form.
The new class will start in a week or so. The meditation classes have been beneficial to the residents; they have grabbed onto the idea of being alone with themselves, drinking in silence, and being calm.
Jon: Brilliant idea !
What a marvelous idea! I wish, now as an adult, I had paid more attention to the stories my parents and other relatives told. I have so many questions and no one to ask.
Jon this is excelkent and honor you for offer to write them down and get them printed.
Tell them fir me thank you for wanting to tell their stories, there are so many ( for whatever reason) aren.t wilking to tell their stories, even when asked ( as is the case with many of the elders in my family, who have long since died)
Those who say their lives are NOT worth telling will be the most interesting (if you have a set of questions they may want to address).
The book Elderhood talkings a lot about one not becoming the FALSE stereotype. Also Georgia Artzberger presents to Congress a lot on this issue
I love how your classes at the Mansion are evolving……. based on the residents needs, with your well honed intuition. I think creating a book with their deepest feelings and thoughts is a wonderful idea! Their voices *can* still be heard ……..just in a new and different way. I applaud you for all you do there, it continues to amaze me
Susan M
Question — why do mature adults need their families’ approval to participate?
Because some of the residents are impaired and are not able to make some decisions about their lives. Memory Care, stroke victims, or those with cognitive issues in very advanced age. I would never wish to take pictures or write about someone in that condition whose families disapproved or new of good reasons why it might be harmful.It’s very rare in my experience, but it does happen. There are good reasons for it.