10 March

Re-thinking My Work: Plunging Into Memory Care And The Mansion Again

by Jon Katz

I spent an hour after my Mansion meditation class this morning with Paryese, the new activities director in the Mansion’s memory care unit.

We clicked, and her enthusiasm was infectious. I ended up ordering exercise balloons, an African drum, a crockpot, and a dozen pool noodles before I left the building.

I nearly wiped out the Mansion Fund but for a good cause.

I also ordered clothing for three of the Mansion residents who needed help and came up with three bags of the ’50s and 60’s clothes for the celebration.

(If you have any clean vintage clothes from that period, and you can part with them, please send them to Tania  Woodward, the Mansion, 11 S. Union Avenue, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816.)

I agreed to visit the Memory Care unit with Zinnia at least once a week. Paryese and I talked about re-starting the highly successful Mansion Wish Lists, which were suspended during the pandemic, along with my ability to visit.

I had a beautiful meditation class this morning. Ellen came from the Memory Care Unit, and she has the sweetest and most lovely face and disposition. I talked about how meditation can help people who are watching the news.

Ellen has been to every one of the meditation sessions and always asks the aides when she can meditate again. I want to try it with some of the Memory Care residents.

The aides think it will help them.

I am drawn to doing more work in Memory Care and helping them get the tools, games, and support they need and deserve. Zinnia is fantastic with memory care residents; she is patient, affectionate, and very gentle.

Two years ago, I worked with psychologists to offer memory-stimulating literature to the residents; we had some real success. There is no hope I know of restoring full memory, but I have seen some memory restored and improved.

It can be done.

I want to return to this work more seriously.

The pandemic made this work nearly impossible, but things are returning to normal there. I believe we helped the Mansion keep their residents safe for two years by purchasing masks and disinfectant sprayers early on.

With Maryse and Tania Woodward, I have two strong and dedicated people to work with and guide me towards what can help. We are moving again. I feel this right in my heart and soul.

It is better to do good than argue about what good is. These are people on the edge of life, often forgotten and left behind.

The three of us are working to return me to the creative work the Army of Good was doing at the Mansion until the pandemic slowed it all down.

I’m scheduling two visits a week now – my meditation class and memory care visit. I’m getting to know the residents again and learning more about them.

I’m beginning to post portraits of them. I want to write about them and their lives individually. Making these personal connections is so important, as you may remember.

My excitement and enthusiasm are returning, and I’m very excited about it. This is perfect for the Army Of Good – small acts of great kindness.

More than ever, we need ways to feel good.

We are also waiting to learn how to help the refugee children at Bishop Maginn when they move to their new school in the Fall.

I’ve had a minor response so far to our plea for help funding a prom. I’m reluctant to fundraise too much now, given what is happening in Ukraine.

Many people want to send their donations for good there, and I can’t argue with that and don’t wish to. Very few of us have a lot of money.

If people want to send any gift, large and small, for the prom, they can send a tax-deductible check to Mike Tolan, Principal, Bishop Maginn High School, 75 Park Street, Albany, N.Y., 12202.

If not, I understand. It’s a painful and needy world right now. And many people are in desperate need. I’ve gotten about $400 in small donations sent to me; I’m sending them to Bishop Maginn.

I initially asked for $5,000, but I’m not sure if it is or isn’t realistic in the middle of all this trauma and bloodshed. This is new terrain for all of us.

I’m not quitting on this prom stuff, though. Here will be a prom; the kids do need and deserve it as the school closes in June for good; I will continue to raise money for it.

I will make it work, one way or another. I can’t let these kids down.

If you wish, send whatever you want to Mike at the above address, or if you prefer, to me, Jon Katz, Bishop Maginn Prom Fund, P.O. Box 205, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816. You can also contribute via Paypal, [email protected].

Contributions send to Mike are tax-deductible.

When I started the fundraising, I didn’t imagine the ferocity and tragedy of the Ukrainian invasion. I am horrified by it, as are many of you.

I will continue my work at the Mansion, especially in the Memory Care unit and Mansion, over the next few weeks. I’ll also be visiting Bishop Maginn to understand better how I can help with this transition.

If you can and wish,  you can help build up the Mansion Fund by donating to me via Paypal, [email protected], or to the post office address,  Jon Katz, Mansion Fund, P.O. Box 205, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816.

There is so much need in the world. Our small acts of great kindness have helped so many people in many different ways.

We could use it. Thanks.

3 Comments

  1. Love and appreciate all you do for the Mansion residents and for the Bishop McGinn kids. I can’t support spending $5,000 on a prom even if the horrors in Ukraine were not happening. Proms don’t require private venues or special DJ’s. Our high school proms were in our gym and the most fun part was making our own decorations out of recycled materials. It was the spirit of our classmates that made it special.

    1. I understand how you feel, Jean; thanks for your honesty.

      I can’t argue that spending all that money on a prom compared to Ukraine is a simple or easy choice. I don’t fault you or anyone else who doesn’t want to do it.

      I don’t share your view that the prom as they imagine it is not essential or that these very pressed children and families have the resources to put together the kind of celebration they want to have.

      What you did for your prom or I did for prom doesn’t have any relevance to them, given their own lives and wishes. It is a different world in 2022, and they are not you or me. They very much want an American-style prom, not an art class cut-out prom. They had one of those last year. It has significant meaning to them, and the entire school, faculty and students.

      They have lost two years of regular schooling, and their school is closing, and many have spent years in refugee camps and sleep on the floors in one room to save heating bills and have two meals a day at best. They very much want a natural, traditional American prom, something to remember from a shattered school experience, the Ukraine tragedy is not their doing. They’ve suffered and sacrificed plenty.

      I’m going to do everything I can to help them do it. I respect your position, honestly, but I will continue to raise as much money as possible to give them the prom they want and deserve. I’m not going to argue with anyone about it.

      It may not be $5,000 (or it might), but I am confident we will give them a lovely prom and that it will not take away from much deserves support for Ukraine.

  2. Interesting question about blacks and Latinos, I think their families are more prone to caring for them, that’s what the experts tell me..

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