Last night, putting on my sleep apnea mask, I went to bed shortly before midnight, skipping my usual hour of scanning for British mysteries on Netflix or Amazon.

I looked at my sleep view on the apnea machine and was very surprised to see that I had slept just about eight hours last night for the very first time in my life.

I realized recently that I’m tired around midnight but am not tired when watching police procedurals. Somehow, they crank me up.

So last night, I decided to try something radical for myself. Go to sleep when I get into bed.

I’ve decided to change my relationship with food and also my relationship with sleep. Sleep and I have never been good to one another. I slept very little between my racing, anxious mind and running to the bathroom.

For 30 or 40 years, I drugged myself to sleep using valium; I didn’t know it could be addictive. I got off it about ten years ago and have never once slept more than two or three hours at once in all that time.

I started having sleep problems as a  young bedwetter and never quite got beyond that period’s anxiety and restlessness – and terror. For most of my life, I woke up in the night, in terror and worry, as I did when I was young.

When I was tested for sleep apnea, the doctors found that my heart was stopping briefly 80 times an hour, an extreme kind of apnea that needed urgent treatment.

So I started wearing the masks. It took me a few weeks to get comfortable, and I’m still playing around with the settings. But I almost immediately began sleeping for three or four hours.

The reason for the bathroom visits, said the doctors, is that every time the heart flutters, the bloody sends adrenalin out to the system, which triggers the bladder into doing what the body does when it is frightened -triggers urination.

Over the past few weeks, the apnea mask has changed my life. And last night was the most dramatic evidence of it.

Not only did I sleep for nearly 8 hours, but I never once went to the bathroom or felt the need. That was a profound change. Like many men my age, I wrote this sleep stuff was just another old man thing. Every old man I know complains about all the peeing they do. Thus my nighttime heart issues went unnoticed, and the waking up all night to get to the bathroom have entirely ceased.

I was so used to not getting enough sleep that I never noticed the effect of sleep troubles on the rest of me. People my age need between 6 and 8 hours of sleep every night. The body needs all the rest it can get.

I was often tired and often out of sorts.

As I sleep more and for lengthening periods, I feel my whole body changing. Sleeping is not the same as not sleeping. The occasional drowsiness is gone. I listen to music during my quiet time and read and think rather than sleep deeply.

It’s a contemplation period, not a rest period. That’s different.

I am alert in the morning; Maria says I am rarely irritable now, which I often get up. My focus is strong; my writing comes smoothly and naturally.

I can’t say I’m proud of myself for doing nothing but putting a mask on, but the experience is worth sharing.

I’m learning again and again to avoid old talk and the idea that everything that troubles me is because I am getting older. And thus untreatable.

Once by one, I face the physical and natural challenges of my life, seeking help and taking advice from professionals. I can’t reverse the aging process and have no desire try.

But I can be a lot healthier than I was and prolong my usefulness and life in meaningful ways.

Next week, I return to the sleep lab at Saratoga Hospital for more tests required for extreme apnea cases. I was reluctant to go the first time, mumbling about wearing a mask. I’m looking forward to going now.

I like sleeping for hours, now that I know what it feels like. I want to keep doing it.