The funny thing is that I was hurt when I saw the election news last night. I felt dismissed, discharged, and ignored.
I’m sure many other people feel the same way about me, and if so, that is one place where we can connect.
Yesterday, I saw my neighbors and friends lined up for blocks waiting to vote, and I knew almost all of them were voting for Donald Trump. The local paper said many more people in my county voted for Trump this time around than in 2016.
I went to the Post Office this morning, and I thought the men around me were avoiding me, rushing past me and giving me grunts and nods more than the usual smiles and hearty “good days.”
It wasn’t so much that they were hostile, more like uncomfortable. I guess I was too, for the first time since moving here. And shame on me for that.
A lot of them read my blog, and they know how I feel.
I’ve had a number of conversations with people around here about Donald Trump, not because I’m social but because I wanted to understand why they supported him.
I did learn a lot and wrote about it, but I guess I didn’t learn enough. It makes me sad, for them, for me, and for our country.
Nothing every good comes to anyone who gets too close to Donald Trump.
From their recent comments, it seemed clear to me that they were getting fed up with him. I don’t yet understand the change.
I am always open to talking to them, but not right now.
I didn’t want to talk to any of them today either; the last thing I wanted was a political discussion or to share my confusion about what they did. And we have managed to keep from turning on one another.
I am angry about it, even as I recognize this as unhealthy and pointless. It’s my problem, not theirs. And I didn’t want to show my hurt.
They have the right to be respected for what they decide, as do I.
Trump had asked his supporters to vote on Election Day; he said they would give him a much-needed boost in his struggling campaign. So they did.
I half expected them to look at me today and tell me to go back where I came from.
They know it’s not quite over also, but it is still a big victory for them and the way they see our country and a big defeat for mine.
Resenting them is unfair.
People here have always been kind to me and welcoming and helpful when I need it. They have never made me feel uncomfortable.
I know them to be good people, family people, hard-working people, good neighbors, and friends.
We have always connected on a human level. Why is it I wonder that we are so very far apart when it comes to understanding our country and choosing our leaders?
I am not a local, nor am I seen that way. I don’t have those ambitions.
I have never needed to belong.
People who move here from the blue world are refugees, no matter how long they live here. That is okay by me; I come from a refugee family and have been an outsider all of my life.
I’m a city boy, and everybody sees me that way.
I love where I live; I love the country, the people’s openness, and the acceptance I have always been shown.
But I feel like a visitor this morning, not someone who lives here. I feel more alone than I have felt. We put up a flag that says “All-One,” but that is a daydream, not even close to being the truth.
Talking to Maria is healing, this brings us even closer to one another.
What, I wonder, does that even mean in a country so terribly divided? Yesterday felt like a rejection. I know many other people feel the same way, my e-mail has a lot of mourning in it.
I was happy to put up the flag that Maria and I made, but it looked a little hollow this morning flapping up there in the wind, marking my distance from this community and country much more than my belonging.
It sure didn’t work out the way I hoped.
I want to say that everyone out there is welcome here, no matter who they voted for. I love this country also and yearn for the day when we are not so torn and divided and hurtful and contemptuous of one another.
Small steps, one person at a time.
But I won’t lie about it. It won’t sting so much in a day or so. This week hurt me on a deeply personal level. It just hurts.
I know it will heal, but I don’t want to pretend it hasn’t happened.
The horror is that even without his clothes, the revolting naked Emperor still elicits love and devotion from his 100 million+ brainwashed devotees
It’s an amazing thing, I hope to understand it one day..
That is the biggest challenge for me. I just don’t understand how or why someone would want to support him.
Totally agree with this statement, Carol. I hope to be able to someday sit with a Trump supporter to ask questions. It is so perplexing to me.
I understand how you feel, Jon. I am very upset too. I had so hoped that the country would find its was back together. I know a lot of people who was big Trump supporters and I cannot comprehend how their minds are so different. I think, mostly, I fear for our planet that Trump has no regard for, for the species that will be forever lost.
I don’t want to hate anyone or feel awkward around them, but I really do not understand how 50% of Americans are in favour of what T believes and does. I feel physically sick. And if Mr Biden actually wins, what will the poor man face? I guess you’re right, it will feel better in a few days. Thank God for Nature surrounding us, We can breathe.
I am right there with you.
Me too. I feel as if I have been to a party last night and got up with a bad hang over.
People have free will to do whatever they wish, bad or good. BUT
I just cannot understand how the voting public can give another four years
of our lives to this narcissist.
Agreed. It was bad in 2016 but at least you could be generous with the idea that they were hopeful that a change might be beneficial. Now it’s an endorsement of everything we have witnessed for the past 4 years. Very saddened by this level of support for the current establishment
You are kind, perhaps too kind in my opinion. The lapse of democracy in our future is on their shoulders. I hope the weight is heavy upon them.
It’s not. This has happened before and we’ve come through it..I think we will come through it again..
I live in a very rural farm based REPUBLICAN community. I voted for Biden/Harris and am proud of it. At 70, i LIVED thru the 1968 Democratic convention, the draft, the terrible terrible times we thought would NEVER end….and here we are again, basically fighting for THE SAME VALUES …it’s getting old. BUT, i persist, as i believe (maybe foolishly) that there is MORE good than evil in our county. Todays morning brought me an incredible feeling of nausea and anxiety. I turned off the TV and went out to visit with my horses. They are calm no matter what, they live day to day, minute to minute and i’m trying my dam best to emulate that. I pray Joe/Kamala win, if they don’t it’s a tragic commentary on this country and it’s failure to see out the best. I will be ok, all of us “good folks” will be ok….we just need to believe in ourselves!
Why would you be hurt Jon when it appears that the guy you wanted in there probably will get in there…well, for a little while anyway until Kamala takes over.
Sally, if it wasn’t clear in the piece, it wouldn’t be clear to you here, and I don’t repeat my columns on blog posts, I hopefully have much better things to do.
Hang in there. I’m bewildered too. Trump never has had anyone’s back. He’s the guy that would enslave the very people who support him. Hard working Americans who I bet have never missed a tax payment nor have the funds to play endless golf. But it’s not over. Trump never misses a beat. Claiming he won the election last night. Good God this will take days to sort out.
I’m startled. And I have a deep sense of not understanding millions of people. That’s unsettling. I know THEY are a conglomeration, not a simple group with a simple list of unattractive characteristics. Who are these people who want HIM to run this country? And, part of me is embarrassed for us internationally. I know in time you will address all this and I look forward to your thoughts.
Exactly how I feel. Forlorn. Confused. Alone in caring for those who don’t sit in my place of privilege. Am I ridiculous because I want rights for every single person in the world, never mind this nation? The IDEAL expressed in the founding documents of this nation ( I know it was no more real then, but at least they thought of it!) is the same ideal I hoped to see in my lifetime. I am more certain than ever that I will not and that breaks my heart.
Now I have to fight for my own soul. I can’t allow them to turn me into a selfish hateful shadow of what Americans should be.
Sharing love with you and Maria. We can shine light in our own little corners.
Jon…
I’ve been an outsider much of my life. I’ve lived in most sections of America and worked abroad. The price you pay to experience diversity is that the others get to experience you, too. So, don’t worry about it. Your love of being there demonstrates a common bond with your neighbors, which might be temporarily discounted.
Your neighbors might be feeling as disappointed as you did; maybe even more. They might be wrestling with how to express it, and to them, you could be an unpleasant reminder.
We look for a leader who could bring about good, and I believe Biden could be such a leader. Time is a great healer: Someday your “buddies” might say about Biden under their breath, “He’s not so bad after all.”
We are no worse off than we were five days ago.
Jon, thank you so much for this – and for you calm, steadying perspective throughout this insane election season.
I have never been one to resist change but I was truly hoping that this election would take us back to the good old days of politics and government, those days where we all complained about how our government just doesn’t do much for us. But I feel instead that we are coming into a new time, a radical right wing wave. And not just a “oh, the Republicans are in charge now” time, but a real change throughout the whole world. A scary time where freedom and democracy are seriously in jeopardy. It’s sad because I feel like so many people are letting this happen because they want to protect their 401k and their guns. I feel like I’m mourning the beginning of the loss of America, the best country in the world. Joe Biden being cast as too liberal says a lot about the times we live in.
Well Jon, you are experiencing exactly what you’ve been writing about in regard to Trump. His anger, his divisiveness . Sad when it reaches it’s tentacles out into the country where collegial meetings and greetings happen at the Post Office or grocery store.
I live in the country, I know what it is like. When I lived in the city, people dressed up to go to the shopping mall where I lived. Here, people drive pick-up trucks with dogs sitting in the front seat and you’d never know if they had money or not. The country levels people out.
I’m sorry you experienced discomfort but Trump seems to have a long reach.
Sandy Proudfoot
I had a conversation with my mother yesterday, who is 76, and voted for Trump. She is one of the kindest, biggest hearted people I know and we were both in tears over the discussion. I am so heartbroken that she sees the world so differently than I do, and I truly have a hard time understanding. From our talk, I learned that she was very scared that Harris (although not Biden) was too “Far Left” and would take away capitalism. She also thought that democrats wanted to take away medicare, social security, and private doctors and make everyone be on medicare. Also very fearful of the looting and rioting, and thinks the economy was much better under Trump, pre Covid, and that democrats would kill the economy and lead to bread lines. She’s convinced that Biden and Harris would make our country socialist. She watches Fox News and CNN so believes she is getting both sides. This is a smart, hard working woman, who is pro choice, not racist, feels bad that she doesn’t have a college education, and truly loves people and respects me for my education and opinions. I just don’t know. It feels hopeless. I am glad we connected on a human level and healed some of the hurt there as we are very close, but if she (and so many others) think that way, and is so brainwashed by the media, I don’t know how we change things. Thank you for your writing. I always enjoy it and appreciate your take on the world.
I am confused, baffled, and full of despair and dismay. Somehow I underestimated the strength of Trump’s ideas. And, yes, we will get through this too. But at what cost to the environment and to the rights of all. I find I keep having to remind myself that the election is not over yet.
Ease up, Biden is about to win the presidency..
Like so many others, I too was surprised and deeply disappointed to see all those red states on the political map. I’ve always felt that your vote should go to the candidate whose values and beliefs most closely align with your own. And to the person you trust the most and like the best. If that’s true, it says a lot about the people who honored Trump with their vote. But the good news is there are votes still to be counted and the election isn’t over yet. I’m proud to say my home state of Wisconsin turned blue. No matter how this ends, I know who I am and what is important to me. Life will go on. Thank you Jon for this blog … for giving us a place to come to for truth and hope and humor!
I live about 5 miles from your farm, and so I’m very aware of that feeling of ‘not belonging’ when it comes to politics in Washington County. We hung a flag this summer, but didn’t put up political signs for fear of having them shot at. (Literally).
There have been numerous instances of the ‘Trump trucks’ with their flags, of the bullying. Racism can be ugly here.
I wrote a FB post when Trump first showed up on our political scene, and I asked about the values of those who had influenced my upbringing. They taught me the values I live with today- to be kind & generous and so much more. They taught me much of what I know today, yet I can no longer see them in the same light. As another poster said, they are willing to sell their souls for their 401Ks and their guns.
I’ve lived here all my life, started out as a Republican, and by the time I was 23, I realized that in many, many ways, they either no longer represent my values, or maybe they never did.
Living in small towns can bring great joy- but it can also bring much loneliness. I am sorry that you feel awkward today. Please know that, while not a majority, there are many of us here who did not vote for Trump, and who wish for a kinder, gentler town – and nation.
Nice message, B, thanks..
Yes, Biden will win and that is a wonderful thing. I’ve felt your same kind of disconnect today walking in my neighborhood in rural NC where my county went for Trump 65%/35% this time and 2016. No movement at all. I put up a Biden Harris lawn sign since my neighborhood where I walk 5 miles a day in is full of Trump signs and flags and one confederate flag—somehow I felt like I was hiding the real me if I didn’t. I’m already thought a bit odd since I was born and raised in California and don’t have a local accent. Those homes that support Trump are upscale and filled with mostly people in their 30s and 40s. They aren’t struggling or left behind exactly, but maybe it’s more of an emotional thing and they are fearful of “the other” and a changing way of being together. Racial tension and increased immigrant population is a big factor. Some of them are friendly with me since I’m always walking a beautiful Lab, a perfect icebreaker, but I could feel a bit of a change after I put the sign up. The few other Dems in the neighborhood approached me shyly, almost secretly, and complimented my sign. I think people were reticent to put up signs like mine for fear of property damage. It crossed my mind too. But one of my favorite neighbors (in her 70s) whose yard is full of support for 3 or 4 Republicans has made a point to come out and speak to me more often than usual and bring my dog treats. We stand in her driveway, next to a Trump sign, and chat. Politics is never mentioned, just an intention on both our parts to remain friendly neighbors, as we always have been, even though I’m sure she was surprised to see my sign. I appreciate her kindness, yet struggle with understanding what has happened and is happening and what could possibly be the appeal of Donald Trump who does not care one bit for any of them. So today I felt wistful walking in this in-between time.
Jon, as a retired social studies teacher, I have a flag that has flown over the US Capitol. I’ve proudly displayed it outside my home during Veterans Day, Election, Independence, President, Memorial and Labor Days, I’ve also flown it for the OKC Bombing anniversary, 9/11, and the USA’s entry into the Gulf Wars. I’m proud to be an American with all of her strengths and challenges. It will never be in the back of a pick-up.
Jon, I read you daily and Heather Cox Richardson to stay sane, thanks for your help. I’m reposting something I saw this morning from the Unofficial Heather Cox Richardson’s resource and discussion group. I think it may help us all understand this devide and how to Bridge it. You can watch the trailer.
https://www.thebrainwashingofmydad.com/
I think the main reason your townsfolk and most of rural America vote for Trump is because he listens to them. It’s sad that he lies to them, but he communicates with them. That’s why he won the first time. Hillary and Democratic elite didn’t listen to them, and most of the that elite still don’t. The need to go to the hollers and the hoods and get to them and understand what their needs are. This time, it’s so close that he has almost won, but is likely tonight to lose as Biden takes Pennsylvania. Biden and Harris, particularly Harris did more work listening to working class folks, but not nearly enough in the richest country in the world that some 150 million poor and low income people.
Of course, neither major part nor any of their politicians ever mention these folks, the white, poor, black, latinex, indigenous and other folks who are disadvantaged because of the huge corporations that control the major parties. With Biden in power, there will be some change people in rural America and poor areas in cities won’t see much of this change.