Greg Burch came over to drop off another cord of freshly chopped wood for our woodstoves – straight from the forest to our woodshed. I sensed something was off, and I asked him how JD was. The dog was always with him.
JD, you might remember, was the 16-year-0ld Pug who drove around with Greg for years on his logging runs. JD was the inspiration for my small dog experiment – first Gus, then Bud.
I noticed that most of the big tough men in trucks around here had small dogs they loved so much, they couldn’t even talk about them without crying. And these are not men given to crying.
Greg told me exactly how JD died right on the vet’s examining table in April. This dog had a great life, I told Greg he ought to be proud of himself.
I asked Greg – he’s been bringing our wood for six years now – if he was getting another dog, and I saw the pained look in his face, and I knew what was going on. It was just too soon, he was still grieving.
We are good buddies by now, so I let him have it, which I rarely do. I don’t like to give advice to other people.
“Listen” I said, “you and I are not teenagers anymore. What are you waiting for? Get another dog, and you will stop grieving and get on with your life. You know you want a dog.”
“People like you should have dogs, people who love dogs should have a dog. I got Bud there because of you, but you tough guys in trucks are wussies. You don’t need to be crying, all kinds of jerks get dogs, people like you should really have one.”
Greg was nodding and when Maria came out, he told her about JD. She asked if he was getting another dog. “I don’t know,” he said, “it’s awful soon. But Jon is working on me, he’s getting to me.”
I never tell people how to grieve or when or how long to grieve. But I know Greg, and I know much it meant to him to have JD in the truck when he was out in the woods all day and much of the night chopping wood. The dog meant everything to him.
I told him my theory of dog grief: I celebrate the lives of my dogs, I would rather love a dog than mourn a dog.
When he left, he thanked me and I hope I really gave him something to think about. Greg is a tough guy, a big man in a truck, he will make up his own mind. I hope I see him soon with another dog.
So now we have two cords which my Willa Cather wife says she wants to stack. My plane is to have the woodshed filled with wood and the barn with hay by July. I take winter seriously, and I’ve learned not to wait everybody else is freaking out for their hay and firewood.
The prices go up fast in October.
I appreciate working with Greg. He is honest, and the wood is great. I have a wife who loves to stack wood. Life is good. I hope he gets a dog. Godspeed, JD, and thanks for the inspiration. Small dogs are great.
I have many friends who had wonderful loving relationships with their dogs or pets. and never get another one. They say they never want to feel that hurt and pain again. For me, each animal I have had has taught me how to love and laugh, have fun, play, rest, and get up and do it all over again. I can not imagine a home without the warmth and unconditional love of my furbabies.
I hope your friend allows his heart and home to open to a new dog, he seems like a gift to a dog who needs love and human touch.
Thanks, I normally wouldn’t push anyone, but Greg needs a dog..
There is a dog waiting just for Greg.
Wish I could ‘edit’ my post.
I did Virginia, don’t worry about it. I need editing myself…all the time..
Greg’ dog will find him.♥️
In February I lost my beautiful girl Ziggy at 15 and half. It was her time and I knew it. Shortly after someone pointed out Gypsy to me on a rescue site. With each dog I bring into our home and then passes, I realise that a new dog does not replace my dog that has passed. Gypsy did not replace Ziggy, but she relieved my grief and allowed me to talk about Ziggy with good memories, Each dog has there own special gift they bring to us . Yes Greg needs another dog, I know I did.
And, as much as Greg needs a dog, there is a dog out there who needs Greg.
I’m a firm believer in getting another dog soon after one passes. I also agree that small dogs are great! I’ve shared my life with 10 small dogs since childhood. The few years where I couldn’t have a dog were awful for me. I would cry at dog food commercials. Thankfully I was able to find my lifetime dog. ?
You are so right in what you said. Grieving lessens when you open your heart to another animal. I love your writing and look forward to each post you put up.
Blessings to you.
I hope he gets another dog. I hope he gets another pug! In our house we have 3 of them and the other 4 are all big dogs. Pugs are special little dogs and I hope he gets another one. Rest In Peace JD.
I had the same feeling, I think he really wants the dog..
Jon He needed to hear that – there is a dog just waiting to ride in the truck with him, you know it, we all know it – now Greg needs to know it and I am so happy you went all in!
If you were as forthright in person with Greg as you mention……I’m rather surprised, Jon. You are such an advocate for not telling people what to do or how to grieve……… I’m not being critical at all- just observant. I found your response to Gregs grieving interesting, that’s all. A bit forceful, sounds like. But…….I do hope he gets another dog soon-
Susan M
Yes, as I wrote, it was unusual for me…felt good though and he is a friend..that does make a difference to me..
agreed! You know him well and I believe some people CAN benefit from a *boost* from a friend in order to move ahead.
S
I hope I don’t ever do one thing only and never change..but he is very much his own man..
It is a funny thing but once the hay is in and the wood pile is stacked then winter is not so much of a worry. That is what I loved about living on a farm. The rhythm of it all.
I live on a tree farm in Washington State. My
Chainsaw, my tractor, and my dogs get me through most days. Enough said.
I’m with you…I love my dogs very much, I think I’m a good dog owner..When I have lost a dog, I believe it is an honor to my past dog to give another a good life. My house is very empty without a dog.
When you see someone like Greg with a dog..you can see how he is with that dog. He has a lot of love to give another!
When I lost my Boston Terrier, Fanny, I was numb for a day or two then I saw a Boston puppy looking for a home. Fanny died on Monday and Willow arrived on Sunday. Six days may seem too early but it was not exactly what I needed to heal. She is almost 6 now and my absolute lifetime dog. Love her to bits. I hope he takes the plunge soon. Another pup out there would love to spend days in the woods with him.
Beautiful advice to your friend!