I had two experiences this week that rattled me and made me want to write about the cost of having a dog.
First, a friend came up to us one morning and offered a lengthy horror story about a dog – allegedly a Lab/Shepherd mix – that she bought from a backyard breeder in the Adirondacks for $350. “I hate to spend money on a dog,” she said by way of explanation.
She will hate the decisions she’s about to make even more.
Secondly, another friend who works in a store in town made a point of telling me – people were praising Zinnia in the store for being calm and responsive – that getting a pound dog was the most profound experience of her life. I couldn’t miss the edge in her voice. She did not approve of my buying Zinnia; it was not as “profound” an experience.
These conversations spoke to me about the inverted ethics of dog love, what I call the new and socially sanctioned abuse of dogs. I believe now that more dogs are harmed – abused – by being loved too much rather than too little.
We love our dogs so much we imprison them in crates for years or entire lives because we persuade ourselves that is humane. We abuse our dogs by getting them in the laziest, most impulse and unthinking of ways, and then making them pay the price for our narcissism and selfishness.
The first person, a woman I’ve known a while, said her dog is a “nightmare,” disruptive, unable to settle, untrainable, wild and out of control. She was upset; she disliked the dog so much she tried to give him away, and both times, the dog was returned in one day.
She showed no shame and took no responsibility. It was all the dog’s fault.
She has good reason to be thoughtful about getting a dog.
She is in her 80’s and needs a cane to walk with. She told us she wanted a calm and easy-to-handle dog, she found a breeder of German Shepherds with excellent references, the breeder charged $1,000 for her puppies, but my friend backed out of the arrangement, she said: “there is no way I’m going to pay $1,000 for a dog.”
She then turned to Zinnia, who was sitting in the back seat and said, “that’s the kind of dog I want. What a great dog.” I told her Zinnia cost $2,500, and she was stunned. “I would never pay that much money for a dog.”
And the odds are she will never get the dog she says she wants. I wanted to tell her that you pay, one way or the other. This friend is an intelligent and caring person; she would never treat a human being in so reckless and unthinking a way.
Perhaps my ego was stung. I know it’s not my business. I didn’t say much.
She knows I write about dogs, and she knows I write about getting dogs and training them. She never asked me or called me for help or advice. This morning, I asked her if she needed help, and she shrugged as if there was nothing to be done. I don’t force myself on people, and I believe in minding my own business.
I lose it sometimes when I see what people to do dogs.
I wished her luck and said for what it was worth; Zinnia was worth every penny I spent in getting her.
So was Bud, a rescue dog from Arkansas, who was in the car and is precisely the do this woman should have gotten and would have loved if she had bothered to think about it or talk to people who might have guided her.
Bud cost $1,000, the amount I paid the rescue group for his care and medical treatments. It was worth every dollar in both cases. I got the dog I wanted and can care for. I love giving Bud the love and safety he never had; I loved training Bud through his trauma. I love working with a dog like Zinnia; there is nothing we can’t do together.
I saw my friend staring at Bud as he came to the window and offered his head for patting. He was riding in Maria’s lap; he loves to ride in the car where he is quiet and observant.
She even said, “what a lovely dog he is; that’s what I was hoping for.” Really? From a backyard breeder/hustler in the Adirondacks about whom she knew nothing?
I could not have gotten Bud for $350, and he was a wreck of an abused dog worth nothing on the open market, sick, battered, starved, and traumatized. I could not put a price on Bud, but it’s well over $1,000.
He would have loved to sit with her in her restored farmhouse, looking out at the water all day. She would have loved having him. (And no, I would never give him away, it was tempting for a few weeks back there in October, but Bud’s vet and fosterer had assured me he could work through it. They were right.)
I know this woman is not poor; she owns and sells real estate, taught college for years and has a pension, and collects Social Security. She just refurbished an old farmhouse, turned it into a beautiful home near a lake.
She has enough money to buy whatever dog she wants, through a shelter, a rescue group, or a breeder. But that will mean paying money for a dog. Is this what it means to be penny wise and pound foolish?
Is being cheap about paying for animals somehow a virtue?
It was upsetting to hear this; I feel frustrated and helpless; the poor dog is headed for some Hell; he was the worst possible choice bought in the most mindless of ways.
Buying a dog from a backyard breeder in the Adirondacks is about as moral as buying a time bomb that is almost sure to go off. And it’s the poor dog who will ultimately pay the price. The leading cause of death for dogs in America is their being returned to shelters in America with no chance of adoption.
I wondered, as I often have, why a dog, an animal who will be living intimately with us in our homes and with our families for a decade or more, is not worth spending money to get? Why would this accomplished and educated person endure the difficulties and trauma of a hyper-aroused and probably inbred dog that she cannot train and will not pay train?
To me, this is the new and socially sanctioned abuse. She means no harm, but there is harm.
If she doesn’t want to spend money to get it, why would she spend money to train it?
Was it worth the $700 she saved on the shepherd’s breeder, or even the fees of a reputable rescue group or shelter, whose workers would take care to give her an appropriate dog for her at her age and in her circumstances? No shelter or rescue person I know would ever have sanctioned a big and troubled dog like the one she has for her. They care about more than money.
The second case was just annoying if less sad. I could feel the smugness in her suggestion that getting a “pound” dog was profound.
It was not a friendly observation; it was meant to respond to Zinnia. I was the enemy; I had bought a dog.
I said I had just come from an assisted care facility with Zinnia, and I had the “profound” experience of seeing a sick and dying woman smile and laugh before being transferred out to a nursing home.
There, she would almost surely die over the next few months.
That was profound for me. It is a disappointing thing to see the dog world clove in have like the political world, with its own “left” and “right” ways of looking at dogs. You must rescue one, or you must get one from a good breeder as if there are only two ways in the world to get a dog.
Dogs don’t benefit from this polarization any more than people do; just look at the mess in Washington.
Rescuing animals is profound; I’ve done it many times. Getting a therapy dog like Zinnia is also intense for me, getting a lap dog who wants to cuddle up in a house with a lonely and elderly person is profound for someone else.
What is truly profound is not our using dogs to feel good about ourselves; what is profound is getting a dog; we can offer a good life. What is profound is getting the dog we want and need, and thus will love. And what is profound is sometimes spending the money to making that possible.
A dog is not a moral decision for me; it is a very practical one. If I want to feel virtuous, I can do some good. I want the dog I can give the best life to, and in the case of a therapy dog, do the most good for people.
That doesn’t make me better than anybody else, it just makes me happy, and dramatically lowers the chance of a nightmare, or another dog sacrificed to the emotional needs of humans. I look forward to seeing the joy this dog can bring to me and other people in the world.
I gave this brief, but heartfelt speech and no more was said.
And I will be honest. To get this dog to do the things I wish to do with her, I knew I would have to spend a lot of money on a dog. I am glad that I did.
I pledge that I will never stand outside of somebody else’s car and tell them my dog is a nightmare that I wish to give away because I didn’t want to spend money on a dog, or that I wish I had their dog.
I am happy to spend $2,500 to have a dog like Zinnia for what is probably the rest of my life, and at least for a decade or two, and to know this dog will never harm another dog or a human.
You get what you pay for, with dogs, winter boots, full-frame cameras, with plumbers, with big-screen TVs. I am not better than you; you are not better than me.
I wouldn’t buy a microwave oven that narrow-minded way. I don’t hate spending a lot of money on an excellent lens, either.
(Note: My friend may read this, and I will perhaps lose another friend to my blog. Or she might wake up and listen to her better angels. Either way is okay with me. I needed to write this. I want to say that I will call her and give her the name of a good rescue group I know well. I will also give them her number. Then it’s up to her. I will leave her to her own business to make her own decisions in her own life – something I wish for myself – and will protect her privacy and space. I know her to be a right and admirable person.)
Wow, how sad. Dogs are not born “good” or “bad.” You can spend thousands or next to nothing for a dog but it’s the quality of care and guidance they receive from their owners that forms them. Not training a dog is just setting him up for a tragic end.
Thank you for your clear-headed and compassionate discussion here, Jon. I know people who are absolutely rigid on “adopt don’t shop”, I ‘ve had clients who’ve spent thousands on a dog from a puppy-mill, who had a host of genetic issues but they “liked how he looked”, others who’ve spent thousands on a carefully bred dog from reputable breeders, and I know people who go through the decision carefully and thoughtfully to decide what dog to get, and from what source. You’re right (as usual!) – it’s the dog who ultimately reaps the reward, or suffers the consequences.
Thanks Liz, I agree, there is no one way to get a dog, the best way is the way that works for you..nice note..
Truly appreciate this writing. So well written. I too share your view, your heart.
April
Hello Jon,
Thanks for your insightful comments in today’s blog posting.
I admire your authenticity & courage in speaking your truth.
Recently,
I have been travelling through W Virginia
&
Have encountered a cultural phenomenon that has me perplexed.
Many dogs here are tethered by a 10′ chain to a 4′ dogbox that is lined with hay.
They are chained 24 hours a day,7 days a week,
No matter the weather
(torrential rain,freezing blizzards).
They are only released when their person chooses to take them on a hunt for bear;
Which is typically only during warm weather,4/5 months a year.
I am appalled at this tradition.
Am I missing something in my interpretation?
Are the dogs ok?
Thank you for your understanding.
Thanks Ana, tethering is pretty common in rural areas, I think, the tethers I’ve seen vary. Some dogs are fine on a long lede where they can sit outside and watch the world, some tethers are way too short…It’s an issue in the animal rights world, some places make tethering illegal…
I bought my three Goldens. They are the breed I know best. I understand the pros and cons of owning a Golden. One con is being prone to hip displasia. I buy from breeders because I want a dog who had had their line checked for this. I had family members that always get their pets from the SPCA. They liked labs. Their lab had hip problems. My feeling is I paid up front by buying a puppy. They paid later in vet bills. I also didn’t have to see a dog suffer with pain.
Your opinions about dogs are very lopsided. I appreciate your belief, however, I personally think you are a snob and people that cannot afford the 2500.00 that you paid for Zinnia (a great little dog) should feel that they can go to the shelter and get a great dog. Not a high priced entitled bread, but a good dog for a family.
I try everyday to read your blog and Maria’s and more and more I find you to be the type of people that I would not want to have in my circle of friends. To opinionated and exclusionary. How curious that I don’t disagree with a word you wrote, and you haven’t noticed that. I must be doing a poor job of writing.
Teri, I believe all opinions are lopsided, yours don’t seem too fluid either. I’m sorry if we don’t meet your standards of friendship, my best advice to you is to go where you are happier and more comfortable rather than whine and write nasty notes to people you don’t know. It seems more productive to me. When I don’t like someone, I just stay away, I don’t write them snarky messages, it seems like the American disease to me. Good luck in getting the right dog for you, whatever you can afford, and whatever it costs. We’ll get a refund to you right away…oh, I forgot, the blog is free…(Sorry, we don’t do the nasty social media stuff here…) We are all free to say what we wish without attacking other people…
What about the misguided folks who pay literally thousands for what are nothing but mongrels, like doodles? Many of these people pay far more for a dog who has no health-tested parentage, no training, no thought for coat type, structural soundness, or correct temperament, than they would for a pup from a breeder who does test her stock for soundness, do early training with puppies so that they fit into their new homes with ease, and who is a mentor, advisor, and friend for that puppy’s lifetime. In most cases, a doodle will cost thousands more than a well-bred puppy, and cost thousands more because of health issues down the road, will be untrained, and cost hundreds per year to maintain a coat that is extremely time-consuming and difficult to manage for the average person. Whatever I pay for my heritage breeder puppies, is far less down the road than if I chose poorly produced “designer dogs.”
Hi, Jon,
Thank you for sharing your stories and giving us a glimpse of farm life, sheep, dogs ,donkey, elderly folks at the mansion, great students and wonderful photography and writing. I am not really surprised , but am flabbergasted that people tell you or insinuate how, and where you should get your dogs. from. I think you do best for you in each decision on where, how, and type of dog you get for what they will be doing. I haven’t gotten a dog from a breeder, but my neighbor is a Labradoodle breeder of great respect , who has buyers come from California, I will probably purchase from her one day. I have gotten to adult black labs from a rescue from a women who had to downsize, it wasnt’ free or inexpensive. They are great dogs!. I have gotten several dogs from the pound and have been fortunate that they were great dogs. All of these dogs spoke to me and I believe we picked each other. I thought about each dog, how they would fit in, time and attention they need, cost, food vet etc… I Think you have done a great job in picking great dogs for the work you and they do, be it therapy or on the farm, or just being a good pet. I think if people gave as much thought to their own dogs, picking as they do giving you advice or criticism for buying a dog from a breeder, they might have better experience themselves. Whether it be a pound puppy, breeder dog, rescue dog, keep doing what you do Jon. You Be you and keep making smart dogs choices and decisions. If people were more reflective in these decisions, there would be a lot less dogs spending days in crates, on chains in back yards, and being returned to and in the pound . Take care, and thanks for sharing your stories, knowledge and experiences!!
Thank you for saying this Jon. Having a purposely bred dog does make training easier as people forget or don’t understand that good genetics play a big part in a dogs eventual personality. HOWEVER, a person still has to put in the time to train that dog to its potential. It is not magic, I don’t know why people think that a dog should know what we want it to do. Does a baby just know what to do or do we also train our children? I know people don’t like that analogy,but it is true. All of your dogs are what they are from the time and consistency you take to train them and their genetic makeup. Training is a lifelong activity, not necessarily formal training, but the reinforcement of what they know.Unfortunately, it is the dog who pays the ultimate price for our poor judgement or laziness.
Thanks Marianna, a wise and sensible note, much appreciated…
Our 8 month old dog Skipper is happy. The trainer asks often, “who was his breeder?” We searched the rescue site, places and breeders listed by AKC, and asked at our vet, before asking to be placed on a vet-referred local breeder’s wait list. The breeder takes pride in her profession. Our experience with a loving and happy dog is profound.
I loved reading this.
Your training of your animals is so good I’m envious. Bud may have had a rough start but he landed in a bowl of butter when he came to you and Maria.
Zinnia is the most beautiful dog I’ve seen in a long time. As she grows all her quality shines forth. Her temperament is sterling.
Zinnia is a credit to her breeder. Strong, healthy, well formed animals don’t happen by accident. A good breeder cares about their animals enough to spend the time and money to produce the best. It takes decades to create a dog like Zinnia.
Even at $2,500 I can tell you the costs to raise a litter like Zinnia’s was massive over time. Good health doesn’t begin with the mother and father, it begins generations before with the health and well being of ancestors. I quite admire Zinnia’s breeder. She’s the real deal.
I admire you and Maria for knowing what you needed and searching it out as you did. You did well.
I gulped at the price, but when I think of the good Zinnia will do and the fun we are already having with her, I have no doubt it was worth it for me. There are, of course, lots of cheaper ways to get great dogs, but I think I hit the jackpot with Zinnia..Lenore Severni is a wonderful breeder..thanks for the note..
Drives me crazy when people think there is only one way to get a good dog. Your sweet lab is worth every penny if not more and so is Bud. All dogs are good dogs, no matter where they come from. I would hate to loose well breed dogs to all mutts and would hate to have just breeder dogs. Why do people care what someones preference is? If your friend who is elderly had gotten a rescue older dog small dog she would most likely be pleased, she should not have paid for a large breed dog it makes no since. Can’t people who really love dogs just love them all, not puppy mills and such but responsible animals love from everywhere. that my opinion. Love your dogs
I would aim to shift my perspective. Am I unwilling to invest $2,500 for a beautiful, well-balanced dog but not blink twice at $20,000 (or more!) every 5-10 years for a car? Or a home renovation? I’d want to make sure I examined my thinking and messages from society (“One shouldn’t pay a lot for a dog”) so I know I’m making as conscious a choice to align with my values. Personally, I’d prefer to invest in stewardship of a relationship with a living, joyful fellow being than more material stuff.