Thomas Merton writes that happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm, and harmony.  There is no decision I have made or can make that doesn’t come with some kind of balance or sacrifice.

Shannon Adler has written that a life out of balance is one lived by a person who doesn’t believe happiness can be achieved now, or in the future. That is a life without hope and is a  hard one to live.

Most of my life has been out of balance. I had money but was spiritually poor. I had work, but not love. I had energy, but no peace. Nothing I did apart from work made me happy or brought me peace.

I was out of balance. I think spiritual balance is the principle and process that allows the mind to be still. I believe this is also true for dogs and other animals. I can’t expect the world to settle down, for everything to work out in order for me to be happy or peaceful. I have worked hard to get control of my mind. Some days now, I even do.

The political crisis facing the country is the greatest opportunity in my lifetime for me to find balance. Our President and the polarization that preceded and follows him are deeply upsetting to many people on both sides, frightening to some, uplifting and long overdue to others.

I believe this anger and conflict is upsetting to almost everyone on either side. It is no fun to be angry, vengeful or aggrieved. The danger is to believe people who think differently are happier than I am, or less worthy. We all feel pain, we all suffer.

I am learning that I don’t need to love my President or any political leader or party to be happy. Like money, that’s not where happiness or balance comes from.

I don’t need to have things my way to feel hope or peace of mind. I no longer require everything to go my way to find joy and meaning in my life. Every day I pause, often more than once, to go inside of myself and pause.

I no longer expect to have all of the money I want or need or enough money to put work and worry behind me. Many months, money oppresses me, but it has not made me hopeless or unhappy. Sometimes, I fear my fading place in the world, but it does not derail or stop me.

I am doing more good in more ways than I ever imagined possible, I am learning to push away the hatred and judgment in our world, I am drawing good and compassionate people to my life and work for the first time. I cherish this, and will never again forego it in my life.

Love Donald Trump or hate him, I appreciate that this great conflict has helped me to find balance in my life. For me, the trap is in believing that him or anyone like him controls my emotional life and view of the world.

I have love, work, meaning. I have my writing, my photography, my dogs and animals.

The Dalai Lama says if you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. I have found this to be true in my life, it is the greatest lesson on my path to healing and recovery. I practice compassion every day of my life now. I am happy. I can’t speak for the others around me.

Like our politics, mental illness can be a great spiritual gift. It can force us to understand who we are and who we wish to be.

Spiritual balance for me is how I deal with opposition, outside of myself and within. I sometimes succeed and I sometimes fail, but the very effort is both healing and uplifting.

The philosopher Frederick Lenz wrote that spiritual balance is the answer to the obsession that sometimes accompanies religious (or political) or occult practice, philosophical understandings.

Balance is the answer to the assertion that I must be right – that what I do is better than something someone else is doing, and the way I do it is better than the way someone else is doing it.

For me, spiritual balance is the ability to remain happy when others are being hostile and to refuse to be drawn into the raging stream of argument, discord or hatred.

I am late to this idea of balance, and I have a long way to go to achieve it in the way I wish. But I am closer than ever before, happier than ever before, working within to find and keep the balance in my life.

And above all, balance for me is learning how to be authentic, to never lie to myself or anyone else.