The night of the 2016 Presidential Election, I remember being surprised and anxious. I  admit I did no expect the years-long and volcanic eruption of hatred and grievance and drama that followed.

But in the most curious of ways, they have been good to me and for me.

I remember thinking that I somehow grew up aspiring to a world of honor, love, and truth, although I knew that was, in some cases, a fantasy.  I was a political reporter in my past life, and I did have a sense that night that the world was changing, and my values were being challenged in a new and profound way.

I believe in truth and facts, and I believe in treating other people with decency and honor.

I think everybody reading me grasps how I feel about what’s happening in our country, but I’m no pundit, and nobody needs to hear my daily perspective on division and hatred. I write about my life, not about conflict.

My politics lie in what I do, not what I say on Facebook or Twitter, or even my precious blog.

I don’t subscribe to the idea that everyone who loves the President and his policies is an enemy or a bigot, or committing a crime. I still see America as a place where you can like whoever you want and vote for whoever you choose without stain or penalty, although I sense this is not a universal value any longer.

This and other values I esteemed too lightly, are under siege and being abandoned by millions of people. Some mornings, I no longer recognize my country.

I had this idea that my role in this new universe would be to find good and to gather people around me who shared my desire to do good rather than to spend much of their lives arguing about it and learning how to hate other people.

This idea became the Army Of Good, it was perhaps the best idea of my life.

I like to wrestle with people about my ideas sometimes, but I’m not good at hating people. It’s not how I wish to spend my time, or any significant portion of the time remaining to me on this earth.

Like Northern Ireland, we will one day refer to this time as the time of our own “Troubles.” If you love history, as I do, you know this is not the first such dark time in our country and is unlikely to be the last.

I always believe that wonderful things are ahead of me, and nothing the Washington politicians can do or are doing will stop me from feeling that way. I’m no seer, I can’t say how it will all come out.  I am one person in a vast world.

But I can say we’ve done a lot of good since 2016 and are doing more and better good now.

I don’t mean to brag, but I’ve learned that doing good is the right thing for me, a calling long-buried under self-inflicted wounds and confusion sicknesses of the mind. Doing good is healthy for me, rebirth and resurrection. I am learning other people feel the same way.

I don’t people can upgrade their souls for another, but I do believe we alone in the animal world have the capacity to be better and do better.

So in this time of ugliness, likes, dishonor, and falsehood, I renew my own vows to respond by doing good every day and helping others figure out how to do it. And keep our sanity and bearings.

It comes down to this. Do I have faith and hope, in our country, in it’s people, in the power of love, truth, and honor?

I can say this with all the honesty I can muster. I believe I am loving and being loved more than at any time in my life. I believe I am more truthful than I have ever been in my life. I believe I am more honorable than I have ever been in my life.

This, as is evident, does not make me a saint or a perfect human. Rather, my flaws, mistakes, failings, and anger are precisely what have brought me to a better place.

Every day, I learn more about who I do not wish to me, and also who I am. I have learned to treasure love, empathy, truth and honor.

I believe they are the most powerful and enduring values in the troubled history of human beings.

As many of you know, I admire the writings of Thomas Paine greatly, a common man who rose above himself to find truth and honor in uglier times than we now face.

In the dark days of the revolution, he called upon people to look for their better angels:

“These are the times that try men’s souls,” he wrote in an essay called The Crisis. “The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country; but he that stands by it now deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolidation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly; it is  dearness only that gives everything it’s value.”

This writing helped turn a failing war around and helped to save a democratic revolution. It seems just as relevant to me today as it was when Paine wrote it in the winter of 1776.

I think everyone reading this is a soldier in this new and bitter conflict of values. These times try our souls, and we are all called upon to decide how we will respond. My idea is to be better and do more good.

A conflict like his or ours is not easy or short. But the harder the conflict, the more meaningful and glorious the triumph. I esteemed my freedom too light, truth, love, and honor are dear to me, they give everything its value.

But I believe in the long view. Things change, for the worse, for the better.

I’m not getting worn down or discouraged, and I’m not about to quit. I thank you, good people, for standing with me and behind me. We’re just getting going, we’re on the march. Let the summer soldiers whine and argue, there is a lot of good out there waiting to be done.