Billy was so happy to see Fate the other day in the Mansion’s new Memory Care Center, I brought her back to see him this afternoon.
Fate has all of the intuition a good therapy dog needs about who to approach and how.
Bill remembered her and lit up again, and Fate spent an astonishing 30 minutes sitting next to him and wriggling up in his lap and snuggling while he looked at her, stroked her, glanced at the TV.
Bill told me he grew up in New Jersey in a town right next to the one I lived in for more than 20 years. I didn’t get to find out how he got up here, I might not ever find out.
Fate was a wonder to watch, she has all the instincts she needs to do this work and a lot of sensitivity about moving slowly and calmly.
I asked Fate to jump up on the couch, and she did.
She didn’t move too close or jump on Bill, she was soft, slow and very loving. These two just seemed to connect with one another on a deep and almost instinctive level. I can’t say I understand it, but it was sure a wonderful thing to see.
This dog has a wonderful heart and a genuine love for people.
We will be seeing Billy regularly, along with the other residents in Memory Care.
I’ve learned a lot about talking and reading to the memory-impaired in my time at the Mansion. Bill and I talked easily in his disjointed way, I follow him, go where he goes. We talk easily and comfortably. It was a very good visit.
He is a story-teller in his own way, he loves to talk. It’s my job to listen.
Fate has some great therapy dog moves. About 15 minutes into our visit, Fate put her head in Billy’s lap and he just smiled and petted and stroked her and told me some disconnected stories.
I got the drift. He was happy, and at peace around Fate, and she loved him back, for a long and focused time. Good, good dog. She is really figuring out what this work is all about.
Hello Mr. Katz,
I love the photos of Faith at work. Thank you for sharing them. The images have encouraged me to write about a person/dog issue, which lives in our house. Husband Wm and dog Theo.
My husband is on the Aspbergers Spectrum- very competent on everything except emotional and social interactions, which he dreads and avoids. He has several phobias, phone calls being one of them, and a “thing” about surprises. Like many who are on the spectrum, he is very attached to our 21/2 year old Bichon. And I think that the Bichon, very smart/emotionally aware/protective has responded to the unspoken dread that Wm has for interactions of all kinds. Wm does not want a well trained dog- he wants a non-judgemental, loving being who will make no demands of him, and will keep scary people away. The emotional food, not the continuous responsibility for training that a dog needs. So Theo is in charge, which terrifies the little guy, protecting Wm from interactions with other humans. The dog has become very aggressive, hyperalert, snarling, snapping, wild barking, hurling himself at other dogs and people.
As it stands now, we have ruined this dog. It is massively unfair. Except- when I take charge, he is a different dog. stops barking when I say “Stop!”, has stopped rushing cars/people/bikes. I initiates and makes up games to play with me. Still aggressive, but looks to me for instruction about what to do next, does want to learn and to be outside doing things with me. Like going to the bakery etc.
So we have two dogs in one dog- poor little guy, it is an unique form of abuse. But, my emotionally disabled, badly wired, husband really needs a loving friend. Theo makes a huge difference in his life.
I live so close to this situation that I can’t see how to blend the twodog into one dog. I know that I will need to muzzle him if I decide to take him with me, which just breaks my heart. He is not trustworthy now, and the risks are too great to go muzzle free. But I am hopeful, that with your knowledge of emotional issues and dog issues, you might know of a way I can find a better balance for this dog.
Thank you- I am so sad for both my husband and my dog- I am grateful for your generosity in sharing your complex life.
Elizabeth, I’m sorry about this difficulty. I can’t offer training advice to people I don’t know and dogs I don’t know, it doesn’t’ seem ethical or honest to me. And I’m not a dog trainer. Perhaps you should consider hiring one and seeing if he or she can socialize your dog. If not, you have a difficult decision to make. I won’t have a dog who is a danger to people or other dogs, but that’s just me. We all have to make up our own minds. Good luck to you.
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