Sometimes I am embarrassed and regretful that people think of me as fierce, and sometimes I am grateful that my self-described righteous anger makes hateful people tremble.
Yesterday, I got a message from someone on Facebook, I’ll call her Jackie, who told me she had read my writing for a long time, was “unfollowing” me on Facebook because I had chosen to buy a dog from a breeder rather than adopt one, and was thus enabling the death of needy and deserving dogs.
I had the feeling she expected me to burst into tears and beg her to stay. Or engage in a day-long dialogue about ethics and dogs.
Those of you who have been following me for a while can just imagine my response, I say with humility. Somethings just bring out the monster in me. That is one of them.
I told her I was delighted that she was leaving, go in peace I said, but just go. I didn’t care for people like her to be reading me at all, and she would be so much better going elsewhere.
Her response was by now quite predictable to me.
Like some of our political leaders, they always have to be the victim.
Jackie wrote back that I was an ass, and many other things and vowed to share my response with other people. Great, I said, I’ll do the same, and she was gone in a flash, her insulting comment vanishing with her into the vast Facebook biosphere.
She did the right thing, she was a hit-and-runner. Could she really have been reading me at all?
I don’t care for self-righteous people accusing me of killing dogs, and I don’t care much for cowards who fire off their nasty messages and run for their lives. I remember the unfortunate Anne, who wrote to my breeder warning her not to sell a dog to me.
She fled for her life after I posted her e-mail on the blog, claiming to know a thousand good lawyers who would destroy me if I didn’t stop picking on her, and then wishing me every good luck with my puppy before she ran and vanished.
It seems she doesn’t really care about Zinnia.
I have always considered myself a committed supporter of animal rights, both in my life and my work. And I will bet the farm I’ve rescued a lot more animals than she has.
But the thing about the movement that has come to trouble me the most is that it seems to draw so many nasty people.
Zinnia is a pure creature, an innocent in the endless wars that human beings seem to need to wage with one another. She deserves better from us.
I didn’t even get to tell this person that my choice of dog was none of her business, or that she didn’t know me, my family, my farm, how to train a therapy dog. She knew nothing of my life at all, and thus had no right to tell me what I should and shouldn’t be doing.
Oh, yeah, and who asked her, anyway?
I think it’s promising that these people run and hide now, rather than stay and slug it out. What I’ve learned is that they always run, they never stay to listen or talk, feigning outrage and indignation when their cruelty and insensitivity is not well received.
There are good reasons to talk about saving the millions of dogs languishing in animal shelters or rescue group homes, and about how to do it. But does anyone out there in the movement that says it supports the rights of animals really want to talk about it?
I have been following you for a few years. I tell everyone that will listen to me about your books your Facebook and blog. You have brought so much joy to my life and to other people and animals. I get so angry at people who say stupid things like this women did. She is just plain wrong. Keep up your good work. God bless you !
Bless you back, Kris..
Yeah – trolls. Geez. Some dogs come from good breeders. Some come form rescue organizations. What matters is the heart that adopts them. You, sir, have a big heart.
Jon, adopting Zinnia is a wonderful thing. She will bring love and joy to the masses. What about the folks at the mansion. They will receive her love and companionship. She will fill voids that need to be filled. Its YOUR life. Carry on as you please. Who doesn’t know that about you. Some people are pompous asses. I support you and admire you. Maria as well. You both bring joy to the masses. I love reading your words. I respect what you say and do. Can’t wait to see photos of Zinnia. Your words are beautiful as are you.
I’m with ya…some are just not worth the effort and energy or deserving of the words! Oh, but they want to have the last word! Big deal…whatever!?!
Love that new baby puppy!? All our best to you and Maria.
~Dan and Barbara Teplesky
You did respond well. People who want to practice narcissism whether they know that they are or whether they do not know are best to be gone; it is her problem, and she is responsible for her action.
We have the right to chose our decision about what matters to us. It is our life to live, learn, and to enjoy graciously.
I know myself that if I had received that being said to me – I would be crushed, hurt, and be depressed about it. I myself have to learn not to be responsible for others’ words.
We look forward to hear more about Zinnia.
Moving forward,
Diane
Some people are not worth the powder to blow them to hell! I am so happy for you and Maria with Zinnia. She will be raised and nurtured with love. Don’t sweat the idle chatter! Especially on FB!! You can’t please everyone Jon! Go in peace!
Who really needs Facebook? I am so respectful of the difference you have made to so many lives, Jon – the Mansion, the refugee kids, the Army of Good, but with that, you already know that you will be receiving the messages that will irk you and send you to exasperation – it’s part of exposing your life so fully on social media, – so in all fairness, we readers who really support you and admire you and Maria, don’t need so many follow ups on how the minority comments make you mad – it’s part of being so exposed, which is your choice. Blessings always
Breeders such as Zinnia’s breeder are preservation breeders–they are preserving the traits in a breed that were bred into them and are so important. Without preservation breeders, many of the dogs and their specific traits–whether sporting, herding or warming a lap, would be lost. The US imported nearly a million dogs last year and placed them in rescue–a number similar to the amount of dogs that were euthanized. None of this is regulated and with them came a myriad of diseases. I applaud Zinnia’s breeder as it is getting harder and harder to breed and maintain purebred dogs without being called all sorts of names or have the AR folks take you down for falsified reports. Salute to Zinnia and may she give you and many others years of the sweet love labs are known for.
March on Mr. Katz. Thank you for sharing your life and your wonderful animals with the world!
I read your blog occasionally when it comes across my newsfeed and have always been impressed by your common sense when it comes to animals. You do not treat them like human children and yet you treat the very respectfully and with great love. I guess we share the same philosophy. I also tend to adopt my dogs, but it is not a “must adopt” attitude. I have no problem with someone choosing to buy from a good breeder, and think people who get wound up over where a dog comes from miss the point. It is about providing a dog the best possible home for its life. Choosing one dog simply means another one is without a home. Should we wait until that breeder pup shows up at an animal shelter before we get it, or should we give it a good home so it never experiences years of neglect and abuse?
I found you when I was looking for books about dogs and dog training. We had just lost a dog and were getting a nine-month old boxer from an admitted dog hoarder. The title of your book, Katz on Dogs amused me so much that I had to read it. I enjoyed it and began reading all of your other ones. This was in 2006. I remember how in your first book (I think) you were discussing how you turned 50 and the turmoil that came with it. I myself was “only” 42 at the time, but I remember your thoughts as I reached 50. I have followed your life through all of your many books with your many dogs and animals. I read with concern about your health problems and appreciated your candor when you discussed your mental difficulties. Your ability to write from the heart has been helpful to me in my own life and has given me a different perspective on life as I too followed in your path.
I even read your book where you put down Orson. Not right away. It was difficult. To be honest, I struggled with your reasons, but I saw why you did it. I may have made the same decision if in your shoes.
The one book that spoke very deeply to me was the book called Going Home: Finding Peace When Pets Die. You wrote it in 2012, but I never saw it when I was reading your books for some reason. Perhaps it was fate or God that blinded me to it until I needed it. In October of 2017, the boxer that we adopted at the same time that I found your books passed away. She was by far my favorite dog as I was her human. It was a very difficult time as she slowly declined over about four months. It was a tough time and deciding when to let her go or let her die naturally was very difficult for me. I had people saying, Put her down, and others saying wait. Finally, I was told to do it when I was ready by my wife.
She died at home only a few feet away from me in the middle of the night, and I do not regret how it went. Yet after she died, I struggled with many emotions. It was at this time that I came across your book Going Home. Your words spoke deep into my mind and heart and they helped me so much. You said that we all have to do what we think is best and everyone is different. No one can tell us how to grieve or what decisions to make at the end of our dogs’ lives. Your thoughts lined up with my thoughts and were very comforting to me. I can never thank you enough for that book. I still have it, but have never felt the need to read it again. Perhaps I will reread it when our current boxer reaches the end of her life. Time will tell.
Keep writing as you do with complete candor and with your thoughts from your heart. Many of us learn from you and find comfort in them even when we may not agree with them. I am glad that I discovered your books and will keep reading them along with your blogs.
Every puppy needs a home. Purebred or rescued. Zinnia is lucky to be part of your family! Where you choose to get your puppy/dog from is no one’s business. Sad that the internet has let everyone feel free to leave negative comments…
Jon, I’ve been in the puppy mills and taken lots of broken, adult dogs away from that life and am absolutely delighted for you, Maria and Zinnia. Breeders who work hard for years to develop a line of good-tempered, healthy dogs dream of placing their pups into homes like yours. I so wish everyone could understand there is a world of difference between monsters who breed mass quantities of dogs for retail sale and good people who breed for the love of one or two kinds of dogs. Best of luck with your new friend.
Go with what you love and what makes you happy. Everyone needs to make their own choices. Zinnia is beautiful
<> Love this line. Good column. Zinnia and you will bring sunshine and happiness to many people. Congratulations on your new four-footed partner.
Oops. The line I love didn’t copy when I posted. It’s the one about Zinnia being pure and innocent. Without that line my comment makes no sense and I don’t know how to fix it. 🙁
Lucky Zinnia to be going to a wonderful home.
I was just thinking yesterday while looking at Zinnias photos that a dog from a quality breeder is a beautiful thing. I appreciate that you support a breeder that works so hard to produce such an outstanding animal.
Geesch give it a break already !!! If if were a skif we would all float away. Keep on keeping on John KATZ . I’m not articulate in any way, but please keep on doing what you do.??
It isn’t anyone’s business where you get your dog. You have a purpose in mind for Zinnia and know what you need, I support my local shelters but bought my Golden from a breeder. Like you, I wanted her for a certain purpose. Buying from a breeder does not make us bad people. Can’t wait to read more about you and your new pup.
Supporting conscientious breeders is just as important as rescue. How else do we preserve the integrity of the breed being reproduced? Because I do therapy dog work I want to buy from an ethical breeder who works hard on bloodlines that emphasize health and temperament. I am wary of taking the risk of rescuing when I don’t know the background of the animal and how it might influence my efforts at developing a dog suitable for therapy work. Just last week I spoke to a woman who rescued a beautiful dog but one with baggage that definitely come into play when she does therapy work. She told me she’d never again adopt for a therapy candidate. Obviously it all boils down to the individual and their preference. I’m thrilled you are getting such a gem of a puppy.
This kind of shaming is shameful in and of itself. People like that woman are devoid of reality. Good riddance of her.
Jon, I’m with you! I have been thinking about the very same conduct in life from others, rudeness and bullying and how I now react differently than in my younger years. In my life I usually just accepted and was bruised by being bullied. But now, I call it out for what it is and then I let it go. I have adopted standing up for myself as strategy, just like you matching their vitriol, and then (in my mind) bullies always retreat … agree to disagree. If another can’t be civil then I don’t have time for the nonsense. Why the change… still working it out. I have decided as long as it’s not about changing other person and only my reaction then I am ok. That I am speaking my truth and voicing my dismay. I love that you and Zinnia are together. You and Maria have made a very good decision to bring her home. I can’t wait to follow you story, perhaps another book is on it’s way about training her and following her through the journey of therapy work ? I will send my check today for an advanced copy!
It takes strength, kindness and love to complete strangers when you open a blog. Many of us could be people you would not want as friends but you welcome us all.
It is a privilege to be able to join this group but not an invitation to criticize and even insult you.
Please never feel that you have to tackle the unpleasant ones who pop up here. You are thoughtful enough to strain them out where other readers are concerned and so the blog is always upbeat and helpful. Thank you for this and for the photographs which so often start my day with happiness.
Thanks, the privilege is all mine..
I certainly support your views, your right to be triggered, you choice to deal with your trolls as you see fit (even if it’s not necessarily what I would do). I understand the whole interaction. What I don’t understand are the follow up posts like this one–the sense of you of both justifying and celebrating your anger. Standing up for yourself is a virtue; anger is not. Why keep it alive in this way? Why try to spread it?
Christian, I don’t argue or explain my writing, I write what I feel like writing at the moment, and just try to be honest. I’m not a Saint, and not running for office. I am all too human. And I don’t need for you to understand it. I don’t write for anyone but myself, I am the only one I need to please, although I am grateful that I sometimes please others. If you find my writing uncomfortable, I respect that, you don’t have to read it. I think it’s quite clear why I wrote it and how I feel about it, I’ve had no other complaints or questions. It might just be that I’m not for you. I’m not for everybody. I certainly will not give up writing what I feel and think because it makes you squirmy. That’s the best I can do, or will do.j P.s. I think truth is a virtue also, Christian…
Whenever we’ve been looking for new pets after old beloveds have gone on ahead, and we start making the rounds of Petfinder and shelters, I am always grateful for the words you’ve written regarding animal “rescue” and the art of bringing animals into our lives. It’s a funny old world out there, filled with quirky people and other animals, and we do best when we trust our own instincts for what we need. But I know I’m preaching to the choir.
You are right, it is your choice and none of her business. You chose a legit, breeder, not a puppy mill. Good luck with your new baby. I love your writing. Your last days with Redd were sad, but beautiful. Take care. Dont pay attention to the trolls