I don’t think there’s ever been a day when somebody didn’t question or second-guess me about this Army Of Good work with the Mansion and refugees. I understand that’s the way it is, grievance and suspicion are not part of the national story.
I accept it.
I’m a bit schizophrenic about it.
On the one hand, I appreciate people questioning me – they have a right to know what we are doing – and on the other, I just get weary of the snarky and often poorly-informed questions.
In my less gracious moments, I resent having to take time out of good work to argue with people, almost none of whom have ever contributed a penny to anything, to the best of my knowledge.
Perhaps it was the heatwave scouring much of the country, or our President’s Twitter rages – I’ve started thinking of him as Tweety Bird for some reason – but the messages came in a wave yesterday.
Yesterday was the nasty and grumpy day.
First, there was a surprising message from someone upset that we were trying to buy basketballs for Bishop Maginn or DVD’s for the Mansion residents, or concerned that I didn’t seem to care how Amazon employees were bring treated.
People wondered why I didn’t do more bargain hunting. One angry man – Brent – went onto eBay and listed all of the DVD’s that were cheaper than the prices on Amazon.
I am nothing if not transparent, I owe that to the people who send me their money. I get a lot of thanks and praise, so I suppose it’s only fair that I get a lot of sniping and questioning also.
They call it democracy, and I believe in it. It’s good for the righteous and the Second-Guessers, a vast subculture in America that loves social media. The first message was about basketballs:
“I’m having a tough time with this school. Please don’t take this in the wrong way. I have donated from the wishlist but this basketball request struck a nerve. Of course, I want the kids to have basketballs. Hope you get all you request but what kind of school has a gym with no gym equipment, an art department with no art supplies? What other departments are barebones. And why? This is the type of charity I cannot give to without seeing their financials.”
This one set me back, I admit. How was I supposed to take it? Why was it okay to buy soccer balls and shirts for the soccer team, but not to buy basketballs for Bishop Maginn?
Bishop Maginn High School opens its doors every morning all summer so that the refugee children and the poor children in the neighborhood can come into the gym and play basketball rather than roam the streets, dodging drug dealers and gangs.
The school does not have a single new basketball for its own students, kids have to bring their own scarred, patched and deflated balls.
What kind of school, I wrote back, has no equipment or art supplies?
This kind:
A struggling Catholic School in a poor urban neighborhood whose student base has moved to the suburbs and who admits children whose families have no money to pay for tuition. The Catholics call this a “mission” school, it’s mission is to help these needy children.
The gym teacher begged for those basketballs, I’m told, and I am glad he did.
I told the writer that she may not have noticed that the Catholic Church, the owners of Bishop Maginn are spending billions of dollars justly settling lawsuits, and closing hundreds of schools.
If they closed Bishop Maginn, it would be a catastrophe for the needy students who go there. So they put up six $59 basketballs on their new Wish List. I told this messager that the school was asking for six new basketballs, and I was proud to have purchased three of them. They are all gone now.
I ought to say the sender is a good and generous person, we worked it out. She has often contributed to this work.
(There are now just two items and two gift cards left on the Bishop Maginn Wish List.)
Then this message from someone named Cameron, who suggested he has been reading the blog for a while (but I somehow doubt it.)
“I’ve been curious for a while now,” wrote Cameron, “how do you justify relying so heavily on Amazon, even including pictures that are essentially free advertising for them, knowing the horrific way they treat their employees.”
Cameron is a devotee of the new American way of online dialogue – sending snarky messages while hiding behind computers and then fleeing when challenged. I wrote to him and pointed out that I don’t run the Wish List’s or choose the items on them. I just support them, in order to help the residents and the refugees.
I said Amazon has been a godsend for the Mansion residents and Bishop Maginn. It is simple and safe and the things people need to get there quickly and as advertised. That is no small thing when people are desperate for underwear, socks or shoes.
I don’t really know a lot about how Amazon treats its employees, my guess is that they treat them as badly as most corporations in America treat their employees. I think “horrific” might be a bit of stretch. I don’t think they torture or murder anybody.
In our country, people are just garbage, to be discarded the second profits dip. Switching to e-Bay won’t stop that.
I told Cameron if he could suggest a corporation that could do what Amazon does and support our work as efficiently, I would be happy to pass that information along. I told him if I only ordered things from American corporations who treated their employees with compassion and generosity, we’d probably have to close up shop.
Cameron, of course, hid. It seems he wasn’t all that curious after all.
The idea of a snarky message is to feel the power and righteousness of sending it and then vanishing into the fog. I will never hear from him again.
I was barely done with Amazon and basketballs when Brent and Anne posted messages complaining about the price of the DVD’s the Mansion residents had requested. Six of them were posted on the Mansion Amazon Wish List.
“The Army of Good can do a lot better than buying wildly overpriced used DVDs on Amazon,” wrote Anne indignantly. “There are other sites that have them for one-tenth the price that Amazon charges.”
I also wrote back to Anne, saying that I didn’t choose the items on the Wish List, and I was sure that many could be purchased more cheaply. The thing about Amazon is that it is simple and people trust it and feel safe using it. They also have a vast range of products, almost everything we need, and they ship it quickly and intact.
If she wanted to find items at lower items and send them to the Mansion, I gave her the address: 11 S. Union Avenue, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816. I am waiting to hear back.
Brent went to eBay and posted a half-dozen links to eBay prices and products without comment, permission or explanation. I deleted his messages and told him to get lost.
I will say that I am wary of used products for the Mansion residents. So many are broken, scratched or don’t work at all. I am sorry to say people often send dirty or torn clothing. Or clean out their attics and ship the contents to me without asking. It is always good to ask.
Shopping on eBay with strangers is much more complicated and time-consuming than Amazon. And we’ve had bad luck with it, to be honest. I hate it when the residents get things that are broken, have no guarantees or not as advertised. I don’t want them wearing somebody else’s underpants and socks.
Beyond that, there are few well functioning computers at places like the Mansion. The staff generously takes the time to put some items up on the list, they do not have the time or bandwidth to bargain-shop. And they are so busy, they aren’t required to do this work.
It’s a miracle to have a wishlist like this for the Army Of Good, it is such a good thing, it has done so much good.
I buy many of the items myself if I have the funds, and I do bargain shop all the time, especially for clothes, I have a nice network of thrift shops. But I don’t have much time to bargain shop or browse the Internet either, I surely don’t have an hour to shop around for the cheapest DVD’s.
Sometimes the cheapest way is not the best way.
I’ve suggested three Wish Lists in the past few years – one for RISSE, the refugee and immigrant center in Albany, one for the Mansion, one for Bishop Maginn. All were successful beyond expectations. I can’t speak for RISSE, I haven’t been working with them for some time.
I will say this – the wish lists – was the best idea I have ever had for this work. This is the future of fund-raising.
The lists have drawn scores, if not hundreds of people who don’t have the time or skills to bargain shop online or send money over the Internet. They trust Amazon, and in this context, so do I. Its not my job to evaluate the corporate mentality and honor of every business we work with.
The wish lists have democratized fund-raising.
People can send their money directly to the people and institutions who need it, purchasing things they know are needed. There are no middle-managers or administrative fees. I can’t tell you how much good these wishlists have done. People know – see – what they are sending.
Nobody likes to be second-guessed, least of all me. But being open is important. I want to share these comments and explanations, you all deserve that, even if they do take more of my time that could be better spent.
P.S. There is one DVD left on the Mansion Amazon Wish List, it’s a Clint Eastwood DVD for $30. I’m sure it’s cheaper somewhere else, but if you don’t buy it, I will. It will come tomorrow. (The list is sold out, as of noon, Friday, thanks)
There are two items and two gift cards left on the Bishop Maginn High School Wish List. One is some copies of Shakespeare’s Romeo And Juliet, the other a Jumbo Monthly Classroom Calendar.
I have a dream that both lists will be empty by the end of the day. The gift cards will say up.
As always, thanks for listening.
Jon, I hope you will disregard this “advice” and second-guessing from people with too much time on their hands. Most of us are grateful for all you to to help us make small differences in the lives of some of those who can use help. In the face of the overwhelming need in the world, being able to help a few people at a time is a defense against despair.
I will Lynne, I have worked hard and done lots of research and this is really working for people who need it. Thank for your good words.
Was Cameron’s comment about Amazon “snarky,” or an expression of social consciousness?
Probably both, it seemed a bit self-righteous to me…We help these people in any way we can, and it is difficult and important work. Social consciousness and reality have often been in conflict, and I have heard nothing that makes me believe working conditions at Amazon are “horrific.” I’m pretty sure they suck, tho…I’m not stopping this work to evaluate every corporation in America who is less than noble..who would be left? I believe I am practicing social consciousness in the real world every day, I don’t need to wear it on my head…
Jon,
Part of me wants to say “try not to be over sensitive to snarkiness etc. and don’t waste time feeling that you must reply to them, but then another part of me says you have often settled doubts I have had about the program’s you help so quickly and willingly.
You are more than a candle in the dark–you are a blazing beacon and all my best wishes to you for this.
Lovely message Erika and thanks, much appreciated. I promise you I have a very thick hide, like a tank. You can ding me but not stop me. As you pointed out, sharing this and responding to it isn’t a waste of time for precisely the reason you mention, openness breeds trust..these are questions a lot of people think but don’t ask, so they do need to be addressed. I wish I didn’t have to spend time doing this, but we don’t get to dictate a perfect world..yes? Thanks, again..
I think people just read things they find on the Internet and just respond without thinking anything through.
And maybe pointing out Amazon’s deficiencies is more important to them and actually helping someone.
People are so complex — interacting with them is always dicey. And nothing is ever just black or white.
But I thank you, Jon, for opening yourself up to this work. I can imagine how difficult it is at times.
Thanks Marcia, I am nothing but lucky. Life always has its challenges, for everybody, but I love every day of my life, and you cant do better than that. I appreciate the message…
As I read this post I felt that pit of anger and amazement in my gut over how anyone could take the joy out of this work that you do. Reading your posts are often the most uplifting moments of my day. I am dumbfounded at the success you have had in creating this space for love and heart and soul to flourish and nourish us all. But on the heals of that I also felt the energy of all the wonderful people out there reading along with me and feeling exactly as I do, a deep appreciation for you and your work. I know you know that there are many like me and you don’t need to hear this but it feels good to me to just throw in my two cents again. Go, Jon. I just love what you do and all the creative and colorful ways you come up with to pull it off. I am by far not your only cheerleader but I am for sure one of the most enthusiastic. Bless you!!!!!!!!!!!!
And one of the nices, thank you so much Wendy, and bless you for that…
Hello, Jon:
Cameron here. I only read your response this morning, and I have a job. It’s not exactly fair of you to say that I’ve “fled” just because I didn’t respond to you immediately. Since you control this platform of dialogue, I do hope that you’ll approve my post, so I can defend myself against your attack.
First, why do you doubt that I’ve read your blog for awhile? What’s your evidence? In point of fact, I’ve been a reader since the very beginning.
Second, nobody ever said that Amazon isn’t cheap and convenient–of course it is, and that’s why it’s so insidious. You love your wish lists, because it’s such a visual, tangible symbol of “doing good.” You proudly say that you can order a DVD and have it arrive in a day or two. But do you have any idea how much suffering it’s taking to GET you that DVD in that day or two? You say that you don’t know how Amazon treats its workers, but you “guess” that it’s similar to what other companies do. That guess would be inaccurate. Try googling “John Oliver Amazon warehouse” for a great piece of journalism on just what it takes to woo customers into wanting to buy anything from cereal to toy robots on Amazon. You have a responsibility to make sure that the amount of good you’re doing for a very finite number of people isn’t vastly outweighed by the way you’re choosing to get that done. The question isn’t whether I can find you a company that’s cheaper and more convenient; the question is whether cheaper and more convenient is worth the moral cost of doing business.
Third, I didn’t comment on the DVDs before, but I will now: buying $30 DVDs today is ridiculous. Half of those movies stream on Amazon or Netflix, and the ones that don’t can be bought from Apple for half that price, or rented even more cheaply. Get the Mansion a Roku or Apple TV so they can have access to a vast streaming library and stop wasting money on physical disks that are already out of date.
Cameron, thanks for replying, I appreciate what you say and am glad you spoke up. Sorry for disrespecting you in that way. I appreciate your passion and will carefully read your comment, I am happy to post your comment, why wouldn’t I? I’m not afraid to be disagreed with as you must know if you are long-time reader.
At first blush, you are just too absolute and rigid to me. You have not in any way persuaded me to abandon the Amazon Wish List (it isn’t up to me anyway) on your say so.
I asked you if you could name a corporation that would meet your standards of good and fair employment, and you blew me off, as I thought you would. I don’t accept your idea of what is ridiculous and inappropriate for me, you don’t know me, the Mansion, it’s needs or our resources, experiences, and history. And I don’t really consider it your business.
As a long-time journalist, those are the first questions I would ask before passing judgment on other people: who are they and what do they need, and what is best for them? The Mansion residents deserve first to have their needs met quickly and well, that is my idea of a first obligation. They live on the edge of life and deserve to have their wishes respected.
I don’t feel any obligation to live by your standards of morality, especially when presented in this off-putting way. I don’t live in a black and white world, the Mansion is filled with suffering, struggle and death almost every day. I am blessed to able to relieve some of that suffering, something that seems irrelevant to you and your high moral ground.
And I don’t believe in telling other people what to do. People telling other people what to do is the curse of social media.
And yes, the question is very much how I could help these people and still satisfy your moral values, which I do find stringent. You are ducking that issue – again.
If you knew what you were talking about, if you knew anything about the extreme elderly, you would know that Roku or Apple TV would not work in the Mansion, for all kinds of reasons, from infrastructure to dementia to physical impairment, technological understanding, blindness and even partial paralysis of people who are in wheelchairs and can’t move around.
Your prescription is just the kind of elitist and poorly informed lecture that turns me off and makes your argument seem naive and arrogant to me. You obviously know nothing about assisted care facilities, and from this post, have never set foot in one. Many of the residents are immobile, some have severe memory problems. It’s a Medicaid facility, they have little money, there is no one flip, just-do-this solution. That makes me angry, you ought to know better.
These people are not 18, or mobile or healthy. DVD’s are what they want and are comfortable with and need, and the used and cheaper ones I’ve purchased have not worked for them. Most are in their 80’s and 90’s, have no Internet experience and are terrified of new technologies. I respect what they say they want, not what you say they ought to have. It is not easy to find what they want and can handle, Amazon is one of the very few places the DVD’s are available in any quantity. What is obsolete and wasteful to you is neither to them.
People who don’t have too long to live and are often in pain and uncomfortable deserve a quick response to their needs, you don’t get to dictate that, and neither do I. I am proud of what I do and your casual contempt is offensive, even immature. My wish for you is that you learn empathy as well as self-righteousness.
The reality of their lives is something you might want to know or at least consider before you tell me what to do and piss on my work and the judgments of the Mansion staff.
It’s easy to spout off while sitting behind a computer far away, the reality is a bit more complex. These ideas tell me you don’t know what you are talking about. Self-righteousness is great, but it isn’t enough all by itself. I don’t generally argue my beliefs on the Internet, but this is a valuable conversation and I thank you for having it. Despite your pious tone, you were relativively civil and eager to talk in the open. I admire that.
Amazon has too much power and is insidious, as I know well from my life as a book author. Amazon destroyed a precious world, as I have written many times. I would be happy to recommend an alternative other than Amazon, but it is not a crime to be efficient in itself. Amazon knows how to please its customers.
I don’t decide what goes onto the Wish Lists, I’m not on the staff. They decide what lists they wish to have, it’s not my responsibility. I will support whatever they choose to do, I can live with your contempt quite comfortably. These people also have jobs and work long hours for little pay, and wish lists are something they do out of their hearts, not for pay. They want the residents to get what they need. Sorry to see you crap so casually on that.
The workers there have precious little time – the Amazon workers are paid more than they are – and while you care nothing about efficiency and speed, it matters to the staff and the residents, very much. You have not made any kind of case for “horrific” treatment of Amazon’s employees, more unsubstantiated hyperbole. I am sure they are not treated as well as they should be, I have written about it more than once.
I think it’s great that you care about the Amazon workers, I’m sorry that in your posts at least, you don’t seem to care about anybody or anything else, except perhaps the cost of things. Your lectures on my responsibilities do not move me a whit, they just seem obnoxious and presumptuous. I rarely listen to people who tell me what to do without even knowing me or being asked. My wish for you is that you find some balance in your arguments, some acknowledgment that you don’t have a lock on the truth. I sure don’t.
As to the cost of things, that is up to the people who choose to spend their money on this and to help the residents. You jeer at the idea of doing good and see it only as self-serving, more obnoxious and insensitive rhetoric. If people think it’s too much money for a DVD, they don’t have to buy it, they don’t need to get your permission or approval. Nobody is forced to buy anything, people have the right to see what they are buying. Everything I do, including this conversation, is in the open. I never tell anyone what to do.
How curious that you feel attacked by my response to your attack. Do you really think you have a patent on right and wrong?
So that’s my response to your response. I need to move on, if you wish to talk to me further, you are welcome to e-mail me: [email protected]. I’ll be happy to continue the conversation if you wish, and I wish you the best.
I’d rather be doing something useful than trying to explain myself to somebody who doesn’t seem interested. But as I said, this is an important conversation to have, and I am happy to do it in the open. Take care. It is admirable that you care about the well-being of workers.
There’s a wicked heat wave here and some of the residents urgently need summer nightclothes and shirts, they are sweltering.
I found what they need on Amazon, it will be here tomorrow, and I have absolutely no apologies to make to you for that.
Well said, Jon!! ???
Jon-I was reading BFJ before you started doing the Amazon Wish lists. When you started doing them, first for RISSE, then for the Mansion and now for Bishop Maginn HS, I started donating to these organizations via the Wish Lists. I had an Amazon account and I’ve now moved to a Prime Account. It’s easy, especially since Amazon will send things directly to the school or the Mansion. Items are tracked when sent and you know when they arrive. (BTW, a number of charitable organizations that I donate to also have Wish Lists on Amazon, although I don’t donate to them that way.)
I know that Amazon does not have a good reputation in how it treats its workforce and hopefully it will improve. However, look at Apple and all the stories about how badly their workers in Asian countries are treated.
Finally, I use Amazon because Trump hates Jeff Bezos, and anybody that Trump hates I’ve got to like-at least a little
because I despise Trump. (Finally, I do my own personal boycott of PayPal and Home Depot because both organizations were co-founded by big Trump supporters and I’d never buy pillows from the guy who always hawks them on TV because he worships at trump’s feet.)
Have a good weekend and be careful with all this heat and humidity!
I love Amazon. It has been a secure reliable site for me. I use them a lot. (Rumor is an Amazon warehouse is coming to our area and the people here are ecstatic for the work. It may be a poor job in some places but it is a godsend here.)
I am wondering how old Cameron is? Your long, polite and very, very useful answer to her is exactly how I would have replied to her if I was younger, (I am 82) in poor health with heart disease-tired by this heatwave and now planning how to cook for my husband–just out of hospital, with an appalling ear condition brought on by flying with a beginning head cold.
Once again you answer the questions brought on by this blog of yours. Once again you get an A++!
Cameron you have the black and white mind set belonging to the young. Those working for Amazon are almost always very pleased to have these jobs. We have one of Amazon’s enormous warehouses
very near to us here in Delaware and we know 2 job holders. Yes, they have the usual grumbles of all workers. And yes they are justified) My husband and I regularly groused over our work, although high up the financial ladders of academia. The human animal is not designed for 40 hour weeks but by golly it is dreadful to find ourselves with out them (been there, done that and with two young teenagers to care for)
So, Jon and Maria many of us so glad to be on this strange planet when you both are also here. Best wishes and gratitude from Erika W.
I am glad Cameron came back to comment. Open discourse is important. This line written by you Jon really bummed me out: “If you knew what you were talking about, if you knew anything about the extreme elderly, you would know…” It felt mean spirited in tone and I didn’t feel Cameron’s reply warranted the amount of “correction” that came at him in a way that didn’t seem to move the conversation.
Long time reader and supporter, and I understand the frustration. But sometimes it feels like you are doing the very thing that you do not like – scolding, making your position more correct and the other person wrong for their beliefs. It didn’t feel commensurate with the tone Cameron took – which considering he got shredded and “accused” of disappearing, was pretty reasonable I thought.
You can certainly educate someone on why a Roku wouldn’t work without the lead in of what idiots they are more or less!
Thanks Elizabeth, I felt good about the message to Cameron, sorry it didn’t work for you. I’m not running for saint, I’m quite human, anyone seeking perfection from me will be disappointed. The post is perfect expression of what I was feeling and what I believe. That’s my goal in writing, I don’t sanitize my thoughts. Cameron’s disregard for the residents and their needs was callous and made me angry, the Wish Lists have done so much good. I can live with what I wrote, we are all responsible for our words. There were a lot worse names I almost called him, reading it, I was quite restrained. Thanks for your honesty, as always.
“The lists have drawn scores, if not hundreds of people who don’t have the time or skills to bargain shop online or send money over the Internet. ”
I agree with everything you say, Jon. And I thank you from the bottom of my heart for the opportunity to help a few souls who have it far worse than I.
Yes, Amazon is a beast. And I have written to them about the inhumane treatment of their warehouse workers. I urge Cameron to do the same.
Now…Let’s see what’s on those lists.
Jon,
I first heard about you while listening to an NPR interview some years ago. I was intrigued, and have read many of your books since then. Some more than once. I now read your blog, and I am beginning to read Maria’s as well. I know you are inundated by readers, and I have many times deleted my comments, as I don’t want to add more to what I am sure is a never-ending barrage of energies surrounding you. But, I am finally being brave enough to ask a question. I have about a dozen CD’s from my father-in-law’s collection of jazz music. Would this help your mansion residents in any way? Do they have access to CD players and how do work them? Duke Ellington, Dizzy Gillespie, et al. If it would just waste the Mansion people’s time, I don’t want to further burden them. But if it would be a nice gift (even though second-hand) it might also help me to finally take the first step and reach out. I am not wealthy by any stretch. I’m retired and on a fixed income. But I can certainly do more than I have been doing, and I am feeling this push more and more do be a part of the AOG, even if just in a small way at first.
Gail, thanks for following me for so long and for asking about the Mansion. I appreciate both. I don’t think there is much of a demand for jazz CD’s, when they listen to music, they like to sit around the piano and sing. I’ve never known of anyone there listening to jazz, which is a shame but true. They love to watch movies on discs, you are welcome to join our little army. You can check out the Bishop Maginn High School Wish List – https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/1KH6P4Z74FAQW/ref=cm_wl_huc_view, or wait for a new Mansion Wish List, or send a contribution of any amount to me, Jon Katz, Mansion/Refugee Fund, P.O. Box 205, Cambridge, N.Y., 23816 and thanks again.
Thanks Jon, I appreciate your thoughtful response. I have written down the address, and put the paper in where I keep my bills to pay and birthday lists, etc. It seems the only way I can actually DO these things. While the computer/internet, etc. is wonderful, I find it overwhelming sometimes. I mean to do something, then 30 minutes later I have scrolled through so many things… I can’t seem to hold my focus. Anyway, it helps me to actually turn it OFF, and get it done via snail-mail. So thank you again, and you will find mail this week from a grateful reader in Maryland! 🙂
Thanks, Gail…