From the very beginning of my Mansion work, I’ve been focused on reading to and with the Mansion residents. I’ve learned that almost everything I thought and assumed was wrong, I’ve started from scratch a half-dozen times.
It was an engaging children’s book – the Wonky Donkey, that helped me figure out how to read to the residents at the Mansion in a way that is engaging, entertaining and valuable to them (as opposed to me.)
I had my own rather snobbish and elitist ideas about choosing books that I thought were serious, I didn’t wish to patronize or diminish the people I was reading to.
I dismissed children’s books a demeaning. I didn’t know that although we lump them together, elderly people are not all alike, that is just another form of bigotry and insensitivity.
The truth is children’s books are sometimes perfect for them, as are other kinds of books. It isn’t a question of infanticizing them, it’s a question of stimulating and entertaining them.
In the wealthier, more expensive and upscale elder care facilities – there are many in the affluent cities of Vermont – I wouldn’t think of reading the Wonky Donkey, a funny work-play book by Craig Smith.
The residents there have a different history with reading.
In the Mansion, the residents were not rich enough to get to college in many cases, and they are sick, often with memory problems and other issues that brought them into Medicaid assisted care.
It is difficult for some to focus, or stay alert, or remember what they are seeing and hearing. I had to drop my own prejudices about reading and find books that they reacted to.
Some are children’s books, like the Wonky Donkey and HippoPotamus and Pirate Chicken, some are more adult, longer and more complex – we are reading a story about Maud, an 88-year-old woman who kills people who get in her way and is never suspected of murder. She is just a sweet old lady.
Other are short stories and poems designed for the elderly. I bring them all.
I have begun reading a ground-breaking new book to the residents called Mama’s Last Hug: Animal Emotions and What They Tell us about Ourselves by famed primatologist Frans DeWall. This story, about an aging chimpanzee named Mama and her touching fare well to a biologist she had known for years.
The book has already ignited a wave of discussion and thought about animal emotions.
I’ve also been reading excerpts from Saving Simon, a book of mine detailing the rescue of a savagely abused donkey.
Maria came to the Mansion with me today, the residents love her energy and enthusiasm. She was uncomfortable at first reading a children’s book to the residents, until she saw the smiles on their faces and heard their laughter.
She has a wonderfully natural way of communicating with them.
This is what I look for: a response. The most important thing is to show up, they are not critics, they are not dissecting my reading choices, or sniffing at children’s books. They want to trust me and Maria, to connect with us, to laugh, and get respite from their weariness and the inevitable monotony of assisted care.
I am there all the time. They know I will be back.
They want to be surprised, challenged a bit, think.
They love all kinds of stories, odd sounds and color and anything to do with animals.
I bring a mix of stories, and am no longer uncomfortable bringing tales of Pirate Chickens and Wonky Donkeys. Neither am I afraid to read a story about an 88-year-old killer, hiding behind the screen of her age.
I am connecting, I can feel it. The Activity Room is full when I come with Red, the point is to show up. The stories are almost secondary. This is perhaps the most satisfying work I have done at the Mansion, I am also excited about my Meditation Class, which resumes Thursday.
That is also full up and I’m bringing meditation beads for everyone who comes.
The Mansion residents are important to me on so many levels. One is not what I am teaching them, but what they are teaching me.
If you wish to support this work, I’m planning all kinds of Spring and Summer stuff, boat rides, wagon rides, outings, lighter clothes.
You can contribute by sending a donation to Paypal, [email protected] or by check, Jon Katz, Mansion Fund, P.O. Box 205, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816. My readings and meditation classes will be regular weekly events.
I’ve got about $700 in the fund now, which is good. I also received a $500 check which will go to the boat rides I am planning in June and September on Lake George. Thanks for it.
Small donations are also very welcome. I love my $5 people.
I think some of the old classics like Charlottes Web, would be fun for them. Even the little house on the prairie series.
Just a thought.
Tom, myself and a dear friend are a tag team who read to our Aged Care Residents in our small country hospital every week. We have called our time with them our Reading Circle, The residents are varied also in their backgrounds, some in recent dementia others just frail of body and perfectly with us. We have been reading every Tuesday for the last 7 years. Of course the residents group changes as life takes its toll on them as their age and health decrees. So our audience really does vary. We have graduated from short stories to reading chapters of books each week. We also read a poem every week, quite often matching the topic. There is a delicious one they all loved called “Lamb to the Slaughter” (1953) is a short story by Roald Dahl. … The story was supposedly suggested to Dahl by his friend Ian Fleming: “Why don’t you have someone murder their husband with a frozen leg of mutton which she then serves to the detectives who come to investigate the murder?”. It was a great hit.
One of the joys of children is reading children’s books, the art alone is so amazing. I miss those times with my wee one who is now 27! And many of them tell the truth beautifully.
I used to read “I Will Love You Forever” to my childbirth students, always tears when I did. The truth elicits strong emotion.