Tuesday was my day to read to the Mansion residents, I went there about 1 p.m. They LOVED the story of Maud, the sweet 88-year-old lady who has a tendency to murder people she doesn’t like or who are bad. They love poems and short stories too.
But I had another mission. Red was with me, making the rounds, offering his usual comfort and grace, and then he lay down next to me to sleep. I knew I had to tell the residents about Red’s sickness, and the truth: that he was failing, and could live a good while, or have his spine fracture deteriorate again, and have to be put down.
The vet was pretty clear that the prognosis was not good, his heart is weakening, he is moving less and less. They needed to know, there are few people to whom Red is as important as these people, they have been loving him and awaiting him for several years now. He means a lot to them.
I told them everything, his injuries, his paralysis, the diagnosis, the prospects. There was absolute silence. No tears no questions,, no change in expression, except they were alert and focused, and listening to every word.
Red’s relationship with these people was extraordinarily, meaningful, beautiful and deep. They would feel his loss in a very personal and deep way. But I didn’t want them to find out about Red’s troubles in any other way than from me. And I didn’t want them to be shocked by any sudden or unexpected news. They get enough of that.
Sickness and death are no strangers at the Mansion, the residents see it, feel it and live it almost every day. They know how to process bad news.
I finished my report on Red and just sat in silence for a moment. Only one person, spoke, Alice, who had been listening closely, she loves Red dearly.
“Of course,” she said.
And that was the end of our discussion about Red.
As you have always said, they come when they are needed and leave when they are finished. I wonder what lies ahead for Red? Do you think there’s a Bedlam Farm reunion with everyone? I hope so! I like to think they are always watching you! Thanks, Jon!
❤️??❤️
Jon, you can be sure there will be a lot of private tears (mine included) for your special, exceptional, brave, beautiful Red.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard people say that they didn’t want to tell Mom or Dad something because they didn’t want to upset them. But, as your post shows, seniors have dealt with difficult things in life and the seasons of life are well known to them. Getting old isn’t for sissies.
Of Course Alice. That really does say it all. And as above, to treat a senior like they can’t deal with death and loss is patently absurd – who else has more experience and grace bearing this stuff.
Red has had the fortune to have a breeder who is connected above and found Jon so they could do their therapy work together. Bud came at exactly the right time of course, to take Red into his heart and soul and continue his work.
Thanks for giving the folks at the mansion (and dus) a heads up about Red. Hope the restof his time with you is good, however long it lasts.