When I was a young reporter, I was assigned to follow the Rev. Billy Graham around on one of his great revival meetings. I didn’t relate to the Rev. Graham all that much and was not religious in the way he was.

But as I rode around with him on a couple of plane flights and some busses and interviewed him and got to know him, I came to like him. He was an authentic man, he loved his God and wanted to do good. He was a healer, unlike so many of the politicians who hide behind the mask of God in our world.

The Rev. Graham said a number of things that have always stuck with me: Never speak poorly of your life, never complain about taxes or the prices of things.

And the last advice he gave me. As you progress in years and experience, pause every now and then to ask yourself if you are contributing to life.

An interesting idea. Until fairly recently, I rarely did that or even knew what it meant.

Some people dream of great things when they think about what they want in life, changing society, eliminating disease or poverty. Some are happy to have a family, write a book, invent a new machine, build a house or cabin in the woods.

I think so much of my happiness or sadness or fulfillment as I begin to be old depends on my own sense of whether or not I have or am now contributing something to life. I get what the Rev. Graham was saying, it was hard to see it when I was young and full of time.

Some religions – Christianity in particular – call upon the faithful to do something good for someone; to give advice,  comfort or solace to the poor or needy or vulnerable. It seems that most Christians no longer heed that call.

I’ve taken my own path, I’ve chosen to contribute the small things to life.

Sneakers for someone with bad shoes, underwear for someone whose clothes are soiled and dirty, a fan for someone who is sweltering, a deposit for a clean apartment, groceries for the hungry, a radio for someone whose brain can only be calmed by music, paint brushes for someone who wants to paint, clothes for someone going to high school.

There is a simplicity to this, and some selfishness. If I think small, I can easily be successful, it is harder to fail if my expectations are low.

If i am low in ambition, it’s hard to miss my own target. I don’t seek to save lives, but to ease pain and discomfort.

Each small act of kindness eases my self-doubt and low-heartedness. It builds the self-esteem Bill Graham was talking about. It’s important for me that my actions come not as an expression of fear, but as a reflection of my inner freedom.

Everything I do out of fear is spoiled, tainted. It is the devil in me. I have never accomplished one worthwhile thing out of fear.

It’s so easy for me to become a prisoner of my own delusions, it has happened to me so many times. I’ve learned not to judge myself by results, but by honest intentions. If I only have successes, then I become my own successes.

So now, I think I am beginning to contribute to life. I have stopped selling my identity to the judges of the world, I am keeping it for myself.