Good morning from Gus, and here at Bedlam Farm we wish you a peaceful and fulfilling day. Gus begins his day on top of Fanny and Lulu and he took his first ride on a donkeys’ back this morning, Lulu took him for a stroll around the barn. Gus is pretty unflappable up there.
I woke up thinking about how we can stay grounded and hopeful in a time of conflict and misunderstanding, there is so much bad news and the good news is not considered news at all. Yesterday, I was writing about Nazi’s, today about staying positive and living lives fully. An interesting world.
When I was in hospice work with Izzy and Lenore, a social worker taught me about the idea of “putting it in a cup.” In hospice work, I was confronted with imminent death. Almost everyone I came to know and lived died, usually soon after I met them.
In our country right now, it was difficult to stay grounded, we seem to lurch from one ugly conflict to another, it sometimes seems as if we are being torn apart. I usually try to avoid the news, but sometimes it comes right through our many devices and dares us to hide.
The social worker told me to “put it in a cup.” To imagine myself with my own cup – I chose blue enamel – and whenever anyone tried to pass their anger or fear or sorrows onto me, I just conjured up my cup and put it in there. I learned to do that with grief and death as well.
It wasn’t as if I didn’t feel it, it was, instead, that I taught myself not to take it into my consciousness. This takes a bit of work, but every hospice nurse knows it quite well. Our country can be a daily trauma sometimes, the loss of community, common values, and peace of mind.
It is wearing and disturbing. My cup keeps me grounded, as does Maria, my blog, my photography, my friends, and lately and most especially, the Army Of Good. Whenever I get angry or frustrated or fearful, I ask myself what good can we do today, how can we fill the hole sin people’s lives, how can we feel good about what we do, rather than worry about what others are doing.
In this way, I not only survived this year, it has enriched and fulfilled me. Every time I see Gus on a donkey, take a walk with Maria, help someone at the Mansion, ease the journey of a refugee into America, herd some sheep, post a photo, walk a dog, listen to music, write a book, write something people think about, I am living my life, staying grounded, putting the daily outpouring of argument and grievance into my Blue Cup.
When someone sends me a pointlessly nasty message, i put it in the cup. When a politician says something hateful or stupid, it goes right into the cup.
We all have our own methods of keeping our feet on the ground, but I pass the Cup idea along, in case it is helpful to anyone. These are not simple times to be an American, or a caring person, I am thinking of you. The Army Of Good is my salvation, I hope it does the same for you.
Gus will do his part by sitting on a donkey most mornings at Bedlam Farm. Those who can’t smile at that may already be lost.
If the angry world bothers you, put it in the cup.