Treasure and Donna report that Chloe is settling in beautifully in her new home. She eats next to Queenie and two miniature goats, who have befriended her.  It was nice to see her in the sun, although, like Queenie, there is little she loves more than rolling in mud. Usually, minutes after being brushed.

It often takes horses weeks to acclimate to other horses, it has taken Chloe a few days.

She is eating, sleeping, playing well with her new friends. She has a lovely pasture now turning green, space to run and move around (a much bigger one for the summer), company all the time, available shelter, and a herd to join, which is her natural state. She will have the chance to work and ride continuously, there is a line of doting children and grand-children –  experienced riding horses –  waiting to ride and love her on beautiful country trails.

I could hardly wish for more for her, and it is more than we could give her. Maria and I are up to our necks in good stuff.

Thanks for the lovely comments about her and her move, horse people and farm people understand that these animals move from one place to another all the time, most are very lucky to have those options.  It is not a big deal.  It is the ones with no place to go, the ones nobody want, that we worry about.

Chloe had a fine life here, she has a better one there, almost round the clock love, attention and activity from people whose lives are focused almost completely on their animals.

A small number of people seem to see this as a drama. A couple have demanded I post regularly about Chloe. Some say they are grieving for her. Others are worried about her, one woman fears that the miniature goats, who sleep and eat with Chloe, will harm her because they have horns.

Several have written me and Maria bereavement messages of support, expressing great sympathy for us, even though Maria and I are not  grieving for Chloe, we are happy for her and grateful to have had her. We do miss her sometimes.

It is one thing to grieve for the loss of one’s pet or animal, it is another to sympathize with someone who has lost a pet or animal, it seems over the top to me to grieve an animal who is quite alive and healthy and well cared for. I think – I know – that many of us tend to project our own stuff onto animals, they are, after all, blank canvases, they can’t talk or correct us so we are free to dump all of our stuff on them.

When I wrote my grieving for animals book, “Going Home,” I talked to many vets and psychologists and they all talked about the relatively new phenomenon of what is called “extreme grieving” for animals, which is grieving that is greatly prolonged, that interferes with normal life, or that goes beyond their own lives and animals.

In some cases, this is an illness, and should be seen in that way. Psychologists and social workers are very familiar with this problem, and can help. I’ve seen it many times. Study after study has found that people with prolonged and extreme grieving issues are most often dealing with loss in their own lives, and transferring it to animals. Grieving for pets is natural and healthy, when we can’t move on that it becomes a problem.

I am sorry that anyone suffers on behalf of my animals, but there is healthy empathy and then there is something else. There are lots of animals to feel sad about, Chloe is not one of them.

To the vast number of people who wished Chloe good wishes, thank you. To the people projecting their own grief or unhappiness onto us or our animals, I will be frank with you, as I always try to be.

First, we are not in grief or sadness, we are not in need of comforting.

We will not be visiting Chloe regularly and I will not be posting regular updates. She is not our business now, and we are more than satisfied that she is good hands and is content. We were quite careful about that. If there is ever a problem, Treasure and Donna know she can be returned to us, at any time, for any reason.

We simply do not do drama, we do not bring drama into the lives of our animals, it is not good for them or for us.

Finally,  we have no apologies or explanations to make about such a common and rational thing in the real world of real animals. Animals move around all the time, and like the millions of animals who are rescued each year all over America, the overwhelming majority of them adapt happily to their new homes.

Every once in awhile, I’m sure we will drive by to see Chloe when we are in the neighborhood and say hello. As with much of my life, I will probably share that. But we are not going to investigate her or check on Donna and Treasure, Chloe is theirs, and that is that.

I will not  feed anybody else’s neuroses or enable them. I’ve spent a lifetime dealing with mine.