We are learning that the idea of a trip to India is a frightening thing for some people,  unimaginable, distant, very foreign and dangerous. Maria couldn’t even get her vaccinations without paying a doctor $200 and listening to an hour’s litany of horrors and dangers, from snakes to diarrhea, to tetanus and food poisoning, cholera,  deadly mosquitoes, deadly air, sex traffickers and rashes.

I don’t know if this happens in other cultures, but America has become a fearful nation, everyone uses warnings almost as a greeting,  we are a country of victims.

I could not count the times we have heard – don’t drink the water, don’t use  toilets, don’t put your pocketbook down anywhere, hide your money, never go out alone, don’t be nice to beggars, avoid stray children, stay away from trains, don’t buy tickets on Indian airlines, beware of people with feces-stained hands, don’t touch any food on the streets, don’t breathe too much air.

These fears and cautions may or may not be justified, but it is strange that warnings become the focus of people’s conversation, not the wonder and magic of this wonderfully complex country, which millions of visitors come to every year, with very few bad results. Warnings are everywhere, from tour guides to pamphlets, airlines and travel guides, websites and videos. There is no shortage of warnings, but it is rarer for people to share in one’s excitement.

Yesterday, this very thoughtful woman send me a message for Maria, she told me that she took her two daughters, they were 5 and 7, to India last year and they traveled together across the country (they were from San Diego) for two months on trains, busses, local places, even carts pulled by horses or donkeys.

“We had the most wonderful time, we drank bottled water, or boiled water, which is everywhere and made sure the food we ate was cooked thoroughly. The people were wonderful, the country overwhelming in its beauty, friendliness, wealth, customs and poverty. People have never been nicer to us, so much nicer than here in America. They kept asking us if it was safe to travel in America, there were so many guns and so much violence there. We told them it was safe to travel in America, just as it is safe to travel through India. If my two young daughters loved it so much – they can’t wait to go back –  I don’t think Maria will have much trouble, I see from your blog that she is a hardy farm girl. We just had the most wonderful time.”

There was a lot of wisdom in that message, and I realized again how smug we often are in America about the rest of the world, we think our lives are so safe and perfect, everyone else’s life is dangerous, filthy and inferior.

I think Maria will have a wonderful time in India, she will take good care of herself, as she always does. I will remember the next time someone tells me they are taking a trip to a distant part of the world, I will say, “how wonderful, have a great time.” I’ll leave the warnings to the many people who are happy to keep track of them and pass them along.