When I married my quite wonderful wife, I had no idea how many things she could do. For some years, she worked on restoring old houses, something she didn’t really want do, and so when we moved into our new farmhouse, I was surprised by how many things she knows how to do.

I’ve been very clear in my mind that Maria is an artist, not a handyperson, it is up to her, but I strongly discourage anything that takes her away from her art, where her heart is. But she can do almost anything. She gardens, paints, is a devil with a drill, repairs holes in the barn, moves rocks around, frames pictures, cuts glass, and also makes beautiful art that people want to live with.

She can also make beautiful quilts, wall hanging, crank out potholders and tote bags, organize art shows and open houses, be a good and loving friend to many people. She knows how to love also.

It is odd to be so proud of your partner? I am just perpetually amazed at the depth of her skills, from her art, to her wielding a hammer, climbing up on a ladder and figuring out how to measure a gutter. These are things I always hired people to do, and I grew up having no idea how things actually work, or understanding what I can do.

Climbing up on the ladder to clear the leaves out of the gutter was not exactly brain surgery I handled it quickly and easily. The gutters are harder, and I defer to Maria, who grasps the different elements that would be too complex for me.

But I am fortunate to have a partner with these skills, we have re-shaped and re-designed our home in many ways that have a lot of impact, but that we are proud to have done ourselves. Sometimes having no money is a blessing. We both love the work we have shared in bringing this beautiful old farmhouse back to life inside and out.

So I want to get back outside and help Maria, and I am in awe of the things she can do. She is not Superwoman. There are things she does not do – cook, shop, or clean much (unless something is disgusting.) I love doing the domestic stuff, making suer we eat in a good and healthy way. Our lives are in balance, we switch gender roles on and off all the time.

And I am proud of her.  She is my wonder wife. It turns out a person who thought she could do little can do just about anything, and there are all kinds of lessons in that.