The Internet is a strange and mysterious and quite often mystical place, it makes us crazy and distracts us, sometimes it redefines the idea of friendship and community in the most powerful of ways. I don’t quite know how to describe my friendship with Julie Vogen Beck of Davenport, Iowa, it is a new kind of friendship but so real. Julie has been following my blog almost from it’s inception, we have traveled a lot of life together and are very much connected in this new and unprecedented way.
I became aware of her after her then-husband died of cancer, and she set out on her own hero journey to find love, connection and security in a very uncertain world. From the first, she encouraged me on my blog, in my writing and photography. She rooted for me in my life.
From time to time, she shared some of the pain and struggle in her life with me, I remember encouraging her to get some help, which she did, and I have been fascinated and overjoyed to see the way she has put her life back together, overcoming some painful things, things that might have discouraged or done in a lesser person.
Julie does not get discouraged or done it, she does not quit or complain. A couple of years ago, she got in touch with an old school friend, then she lost the job that was keeping her life afloat. She and Roger decided to pool their resources and get married, and I was thrilled beyond words when Julie came charging into the Iowa City Public Library with her new husband and her daughter to meet Maria and me and to hear me talk.
She was beaming with energy and contentment. She and Roger are having a wondrous life together.
In this new culture, we pass one another like shooting stars, we whiz along on our own tracks, only fleetingly aware of one another. Once in awhile, something in the ether connects us, and Julie and her brave struggle through life have always caught my eye and touched my heart. Month by month, I saw her will and courage and strength demonstrate to me and others that there is no value than whining about life, in struggle stories and lament, the meaningful life comes to those who do not give up on it, do not surrender themselves to the ideas of other people.
Julie lit up when she came charging down the street outside of the library and saw Maria, hugged me and said “good for you, she is such a sweetie! What a smile!”
This morning, she messaged me. “It was absolutely wonderful meeting the two of you last night. In my lifetime I haven’t really ever been keen on meeting people that I consider celebrities, however I have always wanted to have the chance to meet you, Jon.”
Same to you, Julie.
“Maria’s smile is something else,” she wrote. “I just loved how she lights up when she smiles…even Roger agreed with this. I am so happy you and Maria found each other. It was meant to be…You and Maria were so warm and friendly that I will never forget it, it meant so much to me. My daughter and her friend loved the talk and meeting you both also and were so happy that they came.”
I wish I could find the words to let Julie know how much it meant to me that I finally got to meet her; that we have known and stuck with one another in this new medium and in this new way for so long. That we have both cheered the other on as we fell off the rails and climbed back on, again and again. I wish she could know how much it meant to me that she came to see me with her new lover and partner and her daughter. She is a celebrity in my world, and I could feel the very real connection we felt with one another, the sense of a shared experience, her warmth and openness and honesty. It made the trip to Iowa worthwhile in and of itself.
Thank you, Julie, for putting up with me and my life for so long, we have traveled the hero journey together. I told Maria that I hoped you would make it to one of my talks, your bravery and determination to find your rightful path in the world despite the many painful obstacles thrown in your way have always been a light to me. I am so glad to have met you and felt your energy and love. Lucky Roger.
