Some animals are ours, and some animals are not. Red is more my dog than Maria’s, Frieda was really Maria’s dog, not mine. Animals often make their own choices about who is their human. Maria is learning to love Chloe, I think, they are much alike in some ways, they are feisty, independent, and when they want attention, they let you know.
She has been visiting Chloe, learning how to brush and harness her, how to scrape her hooves and comb her. Ponies are headstrong, I gather and Maria says she sometimes has to push back, she has to be a leader. Chloe is definitely Maria’s horse, not mine, this is not something that is ours, it is very much Maria’s. I think that is a good thing. I have spent little time with Chloe, and I don’t imagine that I will spend a lot of time taking care of her. I don’t see myself riding her.
Maria and I share many things, but we both recognize that we need our own things also. Our work is very separate, our workspaces are separate. I don’t see much of Maria during the day, or when she is in one of her creative fits. When I am on a writing jag, I am holed up in my study, she rarely goes into my study, I almost never go into her studio. We are close, we live together in a small house. Independence is as important as closeness.
When she goes into her studio to work, i know she does not need to be disturbed, she gives me the same respect when I go into my office. Tomorrow, I think we will visit Chloe, Maria is into it. My jog is to take some occasional photos, I am eager to get to know the pony, see where it goes. The puppy we are hoping for will also be Maria’s, she will be her studio and walking dog. I am thinking of getting a house dog, a mutt, if I run across the right one. That would be our dog.
I love being around animals, I am not as universally loving as Maria. I love the dogs and the donkeys, Flo once in awhile. I do not love sheep and chickens especially. I like having Red, he is the right dog for me. So we will see where a pony takes us in our creative life and our life with animals.
And I am thinking a lot about my daughter Emma’s wedding in April. I love Emma so much, I am excited for her. I’m not sure a parent ever sees their child fully in terms of being an adult, seeing Emma pop out into the world and open her eyes was a miracle I will never get over. Now she’s a big shot magazine editor, wow. I’m not sure what role I have to play in my only child’s wedding, I guess to stand around and be happy. I’m looking for the right toast, I think I will get to do that.
She has put her life together in a beautiful and impressive way, I will cheer her onto the next thing and raise a glass to happiness and a meaningful life.
As for me, I am exhausted. I worked hard this week writing about the Joshua Rockwood story, went to Glenville twice and was up to my ears in transcripts and videos and blog posts. I am thrilled that he got the $50,000 he asked for, more will be coming. He will be able to defend himself and hopefully get his animals back. My fantasy is that a judge will listen to the testimony, shake his head, ask what are we doing here wasting all this taxpayer money on a bunch of “Bullshit Misdemeanors”, as Ken Norman called them?, and toss it out. I’m not sure the world is ever that neat, but one can hope.
We have nothing much planned for the weekend, our first at home in awhile (the book tour). Lots of sleep and lots of reading and lots of listening to all of the new music I bought and haven’t yet really listened to. I also bought two Iphone games for the first time ever, I will see how that works out. Scott Carrino is sugaring again this weekend, I might get over there and drink some more hot toddies and get stewed again and shake up my blood sugar. Maybe a movie, maybe nothing. Maybe a lot of sleep and rest.
And see Chloe. I’ll have my camera on hand for that.