I am continuously struck by animal behaviors, especially in light of many entrenched human ideas about their grieving and emotions. Red is a dog that enters into the spirit of just about everything we do on the farm. He became visibly attached to Rocky and seemed to act in many ways as a guide dog for him. We were touched by this relationship as were other people and many  have expressed some curiousity about how the other animals, especially Red, have reacted to Rocky’s death.

I have to say that I have never witnessed any kind of animal grieving in my life, which does not mean it does not occur. Many people feel strongly that it does, from elephants to birds to dogs and cats, and testify to it, and I accept their stories. I am not writing to argue this point, simply to pass on what I’ve seen here.

Red and Rocky spend some time together each day. Red would walk ahead of Rocky and Rocky would look for him, sniff him out, sit still. Rocky would touch him with his nose, and then move forward and Red would move up again. They would often sit together. Whether this became a kind of work for Red or another kind of attachment, I don’t know. Rocky was always aware of Red, always looked for him, and seemed to draw comfort and safety from him.

Red was present when Rocky was euthanized and watched the process closely. He also watched Maria and I and seemed to be recording our intense emotions. He came over to sniff Rocky’s body. I always let Rose see any animal who had died or was leaving the farm, as I wanted her to be aware of everything that happened, and I will do the same for Red.

Beyond that, he has shown no visible signs of noticing Rocky. The morning after, he walked right through Rocky’s stall and headed out to look for the sheep. Red does not seem to look for him, or to to the places where the them were together. He simply looks for the sheep and waits to work with them or watches me to see where I am going.

Simon has changed dramatically since Rocky died. He seems calmer, easier, more affectionate. I’ve seen no reactions from Lulu and Fanny, who stayed away from Rocky, or from the sheep who do not seem to worry about things other than food and shelter.

Red is a very businesslike dog, and to me, he typifies the astonishing and remarkable ability of animals to adapt – the millions of dogs rescued each year, the Katrina dogs, Simon, Frieda,  the dogs who have lived with me. If Red is feeling anything beyond what he is showing me, it is internal or invisible to me. I am always inspired by animals like the old sheep, like Rocky, like Simon and Red, to be adaptable. To accept life as it occurs. Many people have urged me to talk to animal communicators about Mother, to find out where she is. I am not drawn to do that. If Mother has any messages, she will find a way to bring them to me, or I will not receive them. I can reach out to her myself, in many ways. But I am not drawn to that either. I am reconciled to the idea that life happens, and there are not always easy or comforting answers for me.

There are not always answers, even though life is quite predictable. We will all be born, live and die. My story, in one way or another, will be the same as Mother’s. Do I need to know more?

This is something animals have helped teach me and it has helped me greatly to be comfortable with my own place in life.