I went up to the top of the hill with Red to say goodbye to Orson and to look out over my farm.  And say goodbye. I thought about the Bedlam Farm idea. It is about living your life. Being creative.  About encouragement. The Bedlam Farm Idea will not be left behind, it is in my heart and soul and life and love. This is a creative place, a place of affirmation, a place that symbolizes our common struggle to live free from fear and the oppressive forces of the world. A place to come to life and stay in life. To seek and find love.

I told Orson he was the spirit of redemption, of loss and gain, of learning and understanding. I told the farm I wanted to tie myself as a gift around its neck and hold it dear. I wanted to pour its magic into sounds and put them on my Ipod and close my eyes and cry into the morning: I once was lost and now am found, my soul and spirit forever embedded into these old barn and rich soul, and in the ghosts of so many spirits that will ride with me forever. It was crazy to come here, crazy to leave. That, I suppose, is the idea, too. There is no risk or loss or pain too great for a meaningful live.

I told the farm that I can see the angels sitting in its eaves, up in your  rafters, on your paths and pastures, polishing their trumpets to sound the call to life.  Can you see the angels here, in this magical place? If you cannot see angels, it is time to move, to change.  If you live here, they are everywhere, laughing, cajoling, pestering, encouraging. So I love you, farm,  and thank you and will shed some of my own tears into your soul, to wash in the river of life, the hero journey we are all on.

I thank all of you reading this for putting up with me, for growing with me, for loving this place with me, for laughing and crying here with me, for stumbling and standing with me.

I have just cancelled my Internet Service Provider and will unplug my computer, and  when you hear from me next later in the day, I will be writing you from my new Bedlam Farm, where the Bedlam Farm Idea will live and grow. And grow.

I can already hear the angels singing there, they are waiting for me. And you.