So this is it, isn’t, I am beginning to learn. The choices we make. What to look at outside of our heads, what to look at inside of our heads. Each day we make choices. I choose to look for the light and beauty and color of the world, for the love I can find, the encouragement I can give and receive, the small miracles, points of light and generosity, moments of the heart and expressions of the heart and humanity. If I watched their news, listened to the laments, complaints, piteous stories that float through the air and fill the spaces between so many people, then I would not see the horses standing in their barn, the golden afternoon sun setting behind them.

In a walk with a dog, the struggle of a chicken, the braying of a donkey, the making of a story, I find the news I want and need in the world. Life is not a struggle. It is not a complaint. It is not a perpetual accusation, outrage or argument. It is not a litany of the awful things they are doing to me, every day. Bad things happen and good things happen, and we will all live and die. Lifeis a gift and an opportunity, and I am learning to see the beauty outside of me, and to find the beauty inside of my head, my soul. A choice, every day.

I do not wish to live a small life again.