Lenore was hanging out with Brutus today, when Rumsfeld, the other ram, came over and decided to hang out with them. Next, I suppose she’ll charm some raccoon into joining their little group.

  July 2, 2008 – Some people think that when dogs jump on them, go crazy, whine and bark that it means the
dog is showing great love. Maybe. I feel dogs show love differently, not by running around aroused and excited, but by deciding who they will hang out with.
  When I go up to my office to work, it usually only takes a few minutes before Rose, then Izzy, and Lenore will appear quietly and curl up in their various corners, stretching and sleeping. They don’t come up to me, lick me or jump on me. They simply appear. And if I move to another room they will soon appear there, quietly and quickly, hanging out in a new place. Our view of dogs is often a reflection of our own emotions, and our own needs and many of us need to see our dogs are crazy about us, and the more excited they get around us, the more we believe they love us.
  My own view is different. I don’t get excited around my dogs, don’t allow playing in the house, rarely (except for Lenore) hug or touch my dogs all that much. I don’t like it when they get excited, don’t encourage or reward it. If you give a dog a lot of biscuits, he will jump around in a lather when you appear, and you will tell your friends or spouse, “look, he is crazy about me,” and you might get all excited too.
  Dogs are brilliant when it comes to food and reinforcement, and if you want them to jump and dance around when you come home, they will do it. It is difficult when studying dogs to tell the difference between arousal and affection. And dogs are not humans, so their notions of love are different than ours, driven by need and instincts finely honed after thousands of years of living with people. We project our emotions on them, and so it is common for people to talk about dogs loving them in the same way people do. This, I believe, is not so.
  Dogs tend to love the people that feed and care for them, and they read and react to human needs and reactions well. They don’t need love the same way we do, and don’t have any language for it They need attention, activity, food, shelter and often, some affection. If you give those things to them, they will love you. If you don’t, they will still love you, because they depend on you for their survival. But they probably won’t be as excited when you come home.
 This is not a cynic’s view of dog love. I love my dogs, and they are very attached to me. I just don’t want to misunderstand them because it makes me feel good.
  There are lots of theories about what dogs feel, and a growing movement to personify and humanize them. If we love them, then they must love us in the same way. One of the primary ways my dogs show affection is to be around me, to follow me, ride in the car with me, hang out with me. Sometimes Lenore and I cuddle, and sometimes I sing to her and call her pumpkin, but otherwise, I am content to just be with them. Arousal is not something I want to develop in my dogs, so I never give them treats when I am working or get too excited when I talk to them. I take good care of my dogs, and I try and show my love the same way they do – by hanging out with them peaceably and happily.