Bedlamfarm.com will be quiet for a couple of days. Off to celebrate my first wedding anniversary. The farm is in good hands, and Simon is comfy in his barn and adjoining corral. Good life for a donkey. I’ve got a few novels – including “The Tiger’s Wife” by Tea Obreht, and “The Upright Piano Player,” by David Abbot, some new games on the Ipad, along with the T.S. Eliot poem “The Waste Land” which I hope to read a dozen times or so. I’m not checking e-mail, and I’m not sure if I’m bringing the camera or not.

I need to do better at doing nothing, and when I have a camera, I’m out taking photos much of the time. Maybe a break is a good idea. My arm could use a rest, too.  Look at things anew when I get back.  I want to listen to music (I just got a “Coldplay” album and downloaded”Revival” by Gillian Welch.) I am eager to read.  I see I can’t possible do all of these things in two days, which is typical of me.  Mostly, I will walk and talk with the former girlfriend. We’ve come a long way together and each of us, a longer way alone. We had a wonderful year. We intend to have more.

I am reminded on this anniversary of the importance of living your life. Of choosing life. Of not living a life in fear, or out of fear. Of self-determination. Of being fulfilled. Of gratitude. Every day, I meet people who are struggling hard to bring light and shapes and images and color to the world, and they are heroic to me, as nothing really can deter those who answer that call.  I believe the creative spark – the shining light – is embedded in the human software. I do believe that love comes to those who open  up to it. None of it is easy, but then, nothing in life worth doing is easy.

I will not miss the dogs. I will not miss the farm.  I will not miss Simon or the other donkeys. They will all be here when I return, it will be refreshing to let somebody else worry about them for a bit.  Maria and I have no problem being together. And I will not miss all of my cable-connected things. I hope to separate myself from technology, from passwords, trouble messages,  the details of normal life and the real world. I know my soul is tired and it needs a rest from me and my frenetic self.

My goal is to honor my marriage, appreciate it, celebrate it, and to go to the next level in a spiritual sense, to expand that peaceful center, shine the light within and respect it. I am appreciating meditation and hope to do a lot of it. And Maria and I have a compelling year to go over and another to plan. I am blessed. I am lucky. I am good.

I’m alive, and then some.