I might not always love the snow, but my dogs always do.  I call “come to me” and they tear down the path, chasing after one another. I am beginning to use that high voice I hate – the chirpy training voice. Because it works.

Another note on grieving. I think intense grieving for animals is quite often a projection of losses and sorrow in our own lives. I spent a lot of time at the University of Kentucky working with attachment theories, and also researching this subject for years.  There is much alienation and loss in our society, and most of us don’t really know where to put it. We love our animals, of course, and sincerely and deeply grieve them. But sometimes it isn’t the only thing we are grieving, especially when it is so deep and prolonged.

I believe we need to be more self-aware in our dealings with dogs. We need to understand the emotions working in us, rather than simply transferring them or projecting them – or anthropomorphisizing them – onto the animals we love. We do grieve our dogs and cats for sure, but we are also, I think, grieving for parts of us, our families, our own lives. I think we need to know that, just as we need to know that when we rescue a dog, it is not entirely selfless. We are doing something for ourselves.